Passion Of A Night

And that damn day I cried. I cried for loving a man who belongs to someone else, even if he denies it, he'll always go back to her. Damn! The first time I really believe I love someone, and feel the extent of that love, the man is engaged and no longer gives a damn. I put on one of my lilac, almost transparent dresses that I loved, put gloss on my lips, a little eye shadow and I was ready. Oh, and I almost forgot the blush to make my pale skin look a little pinker. My hair was layered, shoulder-length and light red, as were my eyebrows, and it was these features that I liked about myself. My breasts were tiny, and when it was cold at night, they almost always had their n*****s exposed, showing that they were there. Marking that thin garment. David was sitting at a table with his girlfriend and a friend. Without any shame, I walked over to him, standing in front of him. "Forgive me, David. Forgive me for leaving you alone, I…" his hand grabbed my arm and pulled me to a corner away from where he was. "I promise I won't leave you alone anymore. My house is for sale! My life sucks, David." "Calm down." L His hand held my face while he looked at me tenderly. "Calm down, what's going on?" "My parents' house is up for sale, they're splitting up and I don't want to lose you. I can't stay away from you." In a desperate way, I touched his face to make sure he wasn't hallucinating. "I need you. I need you, David. I want to tell you about myself, I want you to get to know me, I…" "Giulia, look at me." How could I do such a thing? I was there, driven by the courage the beer had given me and about to do something crazy. "I love you, David. Please don't leave me." I begged one last time, feeling his kiss on my forehead. "Giulia, look at me." I looked up and he was serious, while my chest hurt and I'll never be able to explain such pain, but it hurt a lot, and I just wanted to disappear. "I don't... I don't want you." And as if the world was falling on me and killing me, that's how I was feeling inside. Dead. My attitudes had influenced this, and if I was being rejected at this very moment, it was all my fault. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry for that." His voice was bitter, but if that was his choice, he would never protest, just keep his distance. "I never want to see you again." he removed my hands from his face and I left as if I couldn't feel my body. "A shot of cognac, please!" he asked at the bar and I heard his voice so far away. The music I was listening to was good and one of my favorites. I no longer had the stomach to stay there, I no longer had the courage to look him in the eye and I felt that strange sensation again. Without asking permission, I passed through the crowd that was dancing, glancing back every now and then, seeing him looking back too. [...] Jesse was getting married, but she was still a naughty girl. "Today is the last fitting for the dress. Are you with me?" "Of course. Have you and Barry worked it out?" "We broke up a while ago, you know that. Sit on his c**k once in a while, it's okay, I'm not married yet." "Are you sure that's a good idea? If you still like each other, why don't you get back together?" "Because he's a son of a b***h. It wouldn't work between us anymore, and besides, I love my fiancé and I'm sure I'll be the happiest woman in the world with him." "You're lucky." I turned on the TV to an adult movie channel, and Jesse was smiling at the obscene scenes. We got on our bikes and went to the tailor shop. Getting married is something that was never in my plans, I never imagined being one-man, but now... now I just wanted David in my bed, he was all I needed. Jesse looked beautiful, her curves well designed and she was happy, I was happy for her too. [...] Work was my distraction. I watched the couples chatting, between one caress and another, and I envied them, in a way. "You'll be there today, we're already missing you there." Raul used to manage the nightclub I always went to, but I haven't been there for two months and that's made me feel better. "I don't think it's going to work out. My friend is getting married tomorrow and after that my mother is leaving, so I need to organize myself a bit." "The guy you used to pick on goes there every day, looking for you and when he doesn't find you, he leaves." David didn't know anything about me, where I lived, where I worked... I don't even know if he really knew my name, or just memorized it because it was associated with something. "You know... I stopped adventuring a while ago, Raul. I don't think this life is for me anymore, I've decided to take a break and re-signify myself, because I find myself very lost. Thanks for your concern, I need to work now." There were a few orders to take, I stopped by each of the tables and it was only two hours before I had to leave. I got home and had a quick shower, it was around 10am, I worked daytime hours, so I spent the night thinking about something other than David. I was a few minutes late for the wedding, which had already started. I grabbed my bag and my bike and pedaled as fast as I could to the church, but before I got there, I saw David sitting in a playground, alone and with a shaken expression. I didn't have time for this, nor did I want to, after all, I'd come out of this relationship pretty f****d up and I didn't want to be the other one any more. It was inevitable that our gazes didn't meet, and it was then that I pedaled faster and when I looked back, I saw him running to his car and following me with it. Before David could reach me, I arrived at the church, leaned my bike against the steps and walked in naturally. Jesse looked beautiful, she had already changed the rings and a few minutes later everyone was out of the church. David saw me and tried to approach me. I lowered my gaze and waited for him to say something, but I was too tired to say anything. "I don't know where you live. I don't know anything about you." There was something indecipherable in his gaze. “Giulia, look at me, please!” As I stretched my eyes to look at him, I was pulled away by Jesse and his husband. "Now it's time to stuff your face!". She shouted as we ran. "Are you coming with us?" I didn't look back, but I'm pretty sure he came…