Risks and Chances

2

Kabanata 2

Pride

Malayo pa lang ay natatanaw ko na ang malaking bulto ni Zadriel sa basement ng building ng penthouse ko. Nakapameywang ito, matalim ang tingin sa paparating kong sasakyan. He looks like a father who's waiting for his teenage daughter to come home because it's already past midnight. Nakapameywang pa ang loko.

Nang malapit na ako sa kaniya ay binusinahan ko siya. He glared at my direction as if he could already see me. I chuckled.

I wonder what he's doing here right now.

Pagkatapos maiparada ng maayos ang sasakyan, bumaba na ako mula rito. Naglikha ng alingawngaw ang pagsasara ko ng pintuan. Holding the car keys on my right, I walked gracefully as I ambled towards Zadriel who's watching me, a menacing expression laced within his dark aura.

"It's already late. What are you doing here?" I asked, my brow raising a bit. Nilampasan ko siya. Ramdam ko ang pagsunod niya sa akin.

"What happened?"

"Saan?"

"Your asshole boyfriend is looking for you. He told me that you had a small fight."

I rolled my eyes. Small fight, huh?

I pressed the elevator button to open. Nang makapasok ay sumandal ako sa salamin na haligi at pinagkrus ang mga braso.

"Let him go to hell." I said as Zadriel went inside.

He pressed the button until the door close. Sumandal siya sa haligi sa tapat ko at tinaasan ako ng kilay. Nag-iwas ako ng tingin.

"I'm listening."

"I'm not up for some stories, Zadriel."

"Uhuh. Am I right then?"

I heaved a sigh. I would never forget that this monkey is smart and very observant. Malakas pati ang pakiramdam niya lalo na pagdating sa akin. Ganoon ata talaga kapag magkakambal. We always feel when something is wrong with each other.

"You can say that..." My lips pursed.

"Motherfucker."

Pasimple ko siyang sinulyapan. Storm was slowly building in his eyes that they somehow look cruel. It mirrored mine. His jaw was even clenching. Kung sa ibang tao ay siguradong natakot na ako sa dating niya.

Inihagis ko ang bag sa center table at pagod na naupo sa couch. I leaned the back of my head against it and shut my eyes. Hindi ko alam kung saan nagdiretso si Zadriel. Sa tuwing narito naman siya sa penthouse ay hindi ko na siya pinapakielaman sa ginagawa niya. He feels at home here. Minsan, mas gusto niya pang tumatambay dito kesa sa sariling niyang penthouse.

Huminga ako ng malalim, mabigat at tila may kung anong nakabara sa dibdib ko. Paulit-ulit pa rin na bumabalik sa ala-ala ko ang naabutan kanina, hindi man lang nagawang burahin ng alak kahit sandali.

I'm not the kind of girl that will cry over anything or anyone. Dad has taught us to be strong and mop our weaknesses and hide them under the rug. Hindi ako iiyak nang dahil lang kay Kris. Aaminin kong nasasaktan ako pero hindi ko siya iiyakan. He's not worth my tears. I'm so much more than her cheap w***e.

"Here..."

Nagmulat ako ng mga mata. Isang lata ng beer ang nasa harap ko. Nagbuga ako ng hangin at kinuha iyon. I chugged the liquid down and anchored my eyes on the burning city lights from afar.

"Huwag mo akong sermunan." pangunguna ko sa kapatid.

"Hindi kita sesermunan. Mag-iinuman tayo hanggang umaga."

"I still have meetings to attend to, Zadriel. Kasama ko si Dad doon."

"Hayaan mo na si Papa. Kaya niya na 'yon."

Natawa ako. Minsan talaga ay hindi ko maintindhan kung saan siya nagmana. Zadriel can be as scary as you could ever imagine. Madalas kaming magtalo sa maraming bagay pero parati rin naman siyang nakabuntot sa akin. Whenever he can't decide about something, I am the one who he would seek for opinions.

Nga lang, pagdating sa relasyon niya ay hindi ako sang-ayon. I hate her girlfriend for I sense some bitchiness in her. Halatang may kulo. Ayaw rin sa kaniya ni Mommy. I don't know why my twin is still staying with her until now. Kung may relasyon naman sila ni Tate, hindi ba dapat ay iwan niya na ang totoong girlfriend niya?

If I were him, I'd prefer Tate than his girlfriend Dianara.

Zadriel and I stayed silent for a couple of minutes. Alam kong kanina niya pa gusto magtanong tungkol sa nangyari ngunit nag-aalinlangan dahil baka bulyawan ko lang siya.

He's all I have right at this moment. If he will ask, then I'll give him direct to the point answers. Hindi ko lang talaga ugali ang mag-sumbong at maglupasay.

"You okay?" he questioned after gaining some confidence.

"Guess I am."

"You're not going to cry..."

I chuckled. "Hell, no. A Monasterio won't cry over any worthless person."

He let out an audible smirk. "That's my girl."

Hindi ako sumagot at muling tumungga mula sa alak na hawak ko. Kanina pa ako umiinom pero hindi pa rin talaga nababawasan ang kirot sa puso ko. This is the first time I get to feel this kind of emotion. Sabagay, si Kris naman kasi ang kauna-unahan kong naging nobyo.

"Do you want me to give him a punch?"

I smirked. "No need. Don't stoop on his level."

"But he hurt you..."

"And I can deal with this," I glanced at him. "Ako pa ba?"

Tinitigan niya ako ng mariin sabay napailing. Una siyang nagbawa ng tingin at itinuon ito sa harapan namin, maging ako ay doon na rin ipinukol ang atensyon.

"If Kuya Reon's still alive, he would surely react this way, too. Ayaw kitang nasasaktan, Ania. I know how strong and fierce you are as a woman. Walang puwang ang kahinaan sa'yo pero tao ka lang rin. Alam kong nasasaktan ka. At naiinis ako dahil walang kwentang lalaki ang nanakit sa'yo."

"There's no perfect relationship, Zadriel. Paraan lang 'to para ipakita sa akin na hindi si Kris ang nakalaan para sa akin. I can accept that to be honest. I am willing to accept that. It's just that, the feeling of being betrayed is too much..." I chuckled. "My pride as a woman is damn hurting right now."

Gusto kong malaman kung kailan niya pa ako niloloko. Or does it still matters anyway? May magbabago ba kung malalaman ko? I just really don't understand why he's still looking for me.

Inaasahan niya bang mayroon pa rin kaming relasyon pagkatapos ng ginawa niya sa aking kagaguhan? I'm not a martyr to still stay with him after of what he did. An idiot, more so.

"You know that your twin always got your back, right?"

Nilingon ko si Zadriel matapos marinig 'yon. He's smirking at me. Umangat rin ang sulok labi ko dahil sa nakikitang reaksyon niya. His smirk turned into a soft chukle as he crumpled my hair.

"I know. But I won't still call you Kuya."

He groaned dramatically. "Fine. But I'm still the eldest."

Tahimik akong ngumiti, hindi na nakipagtalo pa. I'm just contented that I have a twin brother like him. But what have been good if our Kuya Reon’s still with us.

Kris:

Can we talk?

Kris:

I swear she's just a hook up. I was just stressed with work and she's there. I respected you so much, hon. Kaya naman hindi kita pinipilit gawin ang bagay na 'yon sa akin.

Asshole. Kaya sa iba mo gagawin ang bagay na 'yon? What kind of mindset do you f*****g have?

Kris tried to bombard me with his calls and messages. Ni isa ay wala akong sinagot doon. I even blocked him from my social media accounts. Maging dito sa building namin ay hindi ko siya hinayaan na makapasok.

"Ania..."

Tamad akong nag-angat ng tingin matapos marinig ang tawag na 'yon ni Dad. I found him staring intently at me... as well as some of the board members here in this boring meeting.

Bukod sa wala ako sa wisyo makinig sa meeting na ito, masiyadong masakit ang ulo ko dahil sa halos umagahin na kami ni Zadriel sa pag-iinuman.

I cleared my throat as I straightened my back on this swivel chair. Ikinumpas ko ang kamay ko at isang beses na tumango.

"I'm sorry. Please continue the meeting."

Naiwang nakatitig si Dad sa akin, malalim at tila pinagaaralan ang bawat ekpresyon ng mukha ko. Una akong nag-iwas ng tingin dahil kahit anong tapang ko, tiklop ako sa kaniya.

"You're spacing out the whole meeting, Zephania. What's wrong?" si Dad matapos ang meeting. Naiwan kami sa long table at nang sabihin niya sa akin na maiwan ako, alam ko na kaagad na masinsinan ang paguusapan namin.

"Nothing, Dad. Just feeling a bit under the weather."

Pinagsalikop niya ang mga kamay niya at mataman akong tinitigan.

"I heard from the guard that your boyfriend was trying to enter the building but you asked him not to let that asshole. Did you two finally break up?"

Ang talas talaga ng pakiramdam nitong tatay ko.

"Unfortunately, Dad."

Isinandal ko ang batok sa head rest at ipinikit ang mga mata. It's then I heard Dad's devilish chuckle.

"Fortunately, you mean..."

Ni minsan talaga ay hindi niya itinago sa akin ang pagkadisgusto niya kay Kris. However, he still let me decide when it comes to my personal life. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang nakita niya kay Kris para kaayawan niya ito. Iniisip ko na lang na nararamdaman nila kapag may mali sa isang tao.

"What did he do to you?" he asked.

"Nothing serious, Dad."

"It is. Hindi kayo maghihiwalay kung hindi seryoso," sabi niya pa. "What do you want me to do with him?"

I smirked. "For now, I don't need your help, Dad. Didn't you teach us to be strong? Wala sa pamilya natin ang mahina."

He bursted into laughter. "Of course. But it's okay to be weak sometimes, Ania. You have a Daddy here who's always ready to defend you."

Nagmulat ako ng mga mata at tiningnan siya. His lips twisted into a dangerous smirk like he's trying to make me remember what kind of devil he is.

Hmm. The most asshole I've ever known, Zion Alexander Monasterio.

"I know, Dad. Thanks."

Tumayo na siya mula sa swivel chair. Humakbang siya palapit sa akin. He bent down and placed a gentle kiss on the top of my head.

"Tell your brother to sober up. Nadatnan raw ng Mommy mo na natutulog sa opisina nito," sambit niya. "Did you two had a drink last night?"

"Siya ang nagyaya, Dad."

He pursed his lips. "You should have invited me."

I chuckled. "Next time, Dad. Kapag si Zadriel naman ang broken hearted."