Loving The Bad

T W O

2 years ago

KAITLYN

This is probably the only day where I'll be happy around my classmates. It was graduation day, and after the ceremony, I'm gonna tell Tyson how I feel.

"Honeyyyyy, let me finish curling your hair." My mom says while she grabs another strand of my brown locks. "okay mom," She continues to do my hair and I check my phone for the time. "There," She says while smiling to herself, "You look stunning Kaitlyn." She exclaims and I playfully roll my eyes. "You're just saying that because you're my mom." I draw out and she chuckles. "Maybe I am," She laughs out, "But seriously, you look beautiful." She gives me a hug before leaving my room to change.

My mom was like my spirit guide. She's probably the only one that makes me feel beautiful even when I can't feel that way myself. She's always taught me not to listen to what others say but in reality, that's really all I do.

Listen to what others think about me, maybe even believe it.

I change into my black strapless dress. It was short and casual but I liked it. I add a bit of foundation and mascara on just for this occasion because I don't normally wear makeup. I gotta at least look decent.

"Kaitlyn, we need to be there in 30 minutes. Hurry up!" My dad yells from downstairs and I quickly scurried out of my room. I went downstairs and put my black heels on which matched the dress. 

"Kaitlyn honey come eat your breakfast," My mom calls out. "I'll just eat a granola bar. I'm not hungry." I respond and she frowns, "Kaitlyn, you need to eat. If this is abou-"

"It's not about anything mom. I said I'm not hungry." I cut her off with a bit of anger in my tone and I suddenly feel bad about my change of tone. "I'm sorry, I'm just not hungry." I apologize and she nods in response. "It's fine. I just don't want you acting out on bad habits. I need you to take care of yourself ok?"

"Okay."

We therefore got ready and drove to my school where the graduation ceremony was being held. "Good luck sweetheart." My dad says while engulfing me in a heartwarming hug as if it was the last time we were seeing each other. I smiled up at him and my little brother who gave me a good luck look as well. 

The ceremony began, and we were all sitting in alphabetical order. Thankfully, I was around people I didn't know. Tyson was a few seats ahead of me so I couldn't exactly tell him at the moment so I had to wait till after the ceremony. 

"Kaitlyn Mcnaughton," Finally, after an hour of waiting they call my name out. I walk up onto the stage and I hear my family cheering behind me. I smile out to them while walking towards my teachers. "I wish the best for you in the future. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise." Mrs. Giberson tells me and I hug her. "thank you, so much." And I truly meant it. Ever since that day 4 years ago, she's always been there for me. 

After the ceremony ended, we had a little party in the gym. I didn't feel comfortable staying there so I decided to stay for a few minutes.

For Tyson.

I search around the room for Tyson only to find him next to Lyndzy. He spots me and smiles. "Kaitlyn, I've been meaning to talk to you." He says and I smile "Yea, me too actually, what's up." 

"I know you don't like her and I've been trying to find the time to talk to you about this," He struggles to say and my eyebrows knot in confusion. "What are you talking about?" My voice shakes. If he says what I think he's about to say then there's no point in what I feel for him, "Ever since I've been tutoring Lyndzy, she's really captured my attention. She's literally everything I could ask for and I'm honestly grateful that things between us are going well. I just asked her to be my girlfriend and she said yes!" 

Oh.

All the excitement and happiness faded from my face. The way he talked about her with glistening lights in his eyes as if she were the world to him made me feel like complete s**t. I felt my tears threatening to fall from my eyes but I held it back in and gave him a forced smile. 

"I'm so happy for you," I wish it were me. "Why didn't you tell me sooner? And also it's fine. If you're happy with her, then I'm happy." No, I'm not

He gave me a heart-warming hug afterwards. "Thank you, honestly. That means a lot to me." He says while I pull away from the hug. This is too much for me, I can't be here anymore without continuing to act like I'm happy. "Oh yea, what did you want to tell me?" He asked.

I'm in love with you. "Oh, it's nothing. I just wanted to let you know that I won't be around here anymore. I got accepted into the Huskies basketball team. I'm going Hayden to pursue my dreams." His smile suddenly turns into a frown. At least I didn't tell him a lie.

"You're not gonna stay in Ottawa?" I shook my head "No, I'm going to school in Burlington, it's pretty close to Toronto. And I'll be playing the sport I love." I shrug and he nods. "Well, I hope the best of you. Will you ever visit back here again?"

"I don't know. Maybe." He sighs and gives me one last hug. "We're still gonna talk right? Just cause you're moving six hours away from me does not mean we still can't keep in touch."

"Yea, of course, we'll still talk." I laugh out and I didn't realize I was crying until I felt a teardrop to my shoulder. "I can't believe I'm saying goodbye to my best friend." His eyes start to become glossy as well. "Like you said, we'll still keep in touch." I wipe my tears away and force another smile. "Alright, I'll leave you to it." He says while walking back towards Lyndzy, who gives me a dirty look.

I don't know how to feel about them. I don't know how to feel right now.

Imagine being in love with your best friend since ya'll were in middle school just to find him dating the girl that bullied you throughout high school.

Fun

I decided that I was going to leave tonight.

I needed to leave this place as soon as possible