Within

The pitch black sky and still, frozen air gave a sense of panic. The smell of something burning hit her nose hard, but she was frozen on the ground where she lay in a crumpled ball. She felt something warm flowing down her left cheek and land in drops on the grass next to her. Trying to recall the events that just had just occurred, Andora’s head began to throb. Where am I? She thought to herself, slowly regaining feeling in her body. But as she gained feeling, she also gained an unimaginable amount of pain. Sitting up, she began examining herself. First she looked at her leg. There was no doubt that it was broken. The bone hadn’t pierced the skin, but it was definitely disfigured to the point that she didn’t think she would be able to stand on it. Her head throbbed again. Instinctively, she reached up to cradle her head and was met with another surge of pain. Pulling her hands away, she looked down to see her palms and fingertips coated in blood. What is going on?! She wanted to scream. The burnt smell wafted towards her again and she scooted herself to be able look around, but the sight was nothing of what she wanted to witness in her lifetime. Flames flickered in her eyes as they filled with tears full of confusion and fear. Her father’s car was upside down in between trees and a clearing about 50 yards away. The little beater was engulfed in fire. “DADDY!” She half shrieked, half croaked. Her eyes scanned for him everywhere. At the beginning of the tree line past the burning car, her tear-filled eyes finally met what looked like a body. Adrenaline filled her and her heart was beating faster than it ever had before. She was able to stand on her one leg and put the slightest bit of pressure on the other to be able to make it all the way to the tree-line. Pain was searing down her leg and through her entire body, but she pushed through the pain. She knew she needed to get to him. It felt like hours when she finally approached the tree-line. She had made it to her father, who lay still on the ground. She couldn’t see if he was breathing. Dropping to the ground, she turned his face to hers. His eyes were like ice. His beautiful blue-green eyes were now foggy. She had never seen anything like it. Tears flooded down her face mixing with blood, creating red, watery droplets on the charcoaled dress shirt her father was wearing. She began to scream at him to wake up, get up, but the cold, foggy blue eyes stared back at her lifeless. She knew. She knew the light was gone. The happiness they shared had ended. She knew somewhere deep down. She just didn’t accept it. She continued screaming at him to wake up until she felt arms wrap around her and pull her away from her father. She couldn’t fathom who would separate them right now, but strong arms held her tight and told her to calm down and that everything would be alright now. Kicking, screaming, biting, to no avail. The arms wrapped even tighter holding her close. EMTs, or “ambulance men” as she called them, arrived on scene shortly after, and she made another attempt to be with her father. Again, kicking, biting, screaming she wanted her “Daddy.” She watched as he was being put in an ambulance and she was not with him. She was placed in a different ambulance, the doors were shut firmly and they headed in the opposite direction. She never would have guessed that once the ambulance her father was in, was out of sight, that would be the last time she would ever see him again. ————————————————————— Jerking upward from her bed, I felt myself drenched in sweat. It had been almost 13 years since the death of my father, but every year, almost two weeks exactly before his death, the nightmares would begin. Once his death date passed, everything would return to normal. Would this f*****g nightmare ever go away? I huffed, rolled over and trying to let my breathing settle. How could I possible get so worked up each time? I’ve had this dream now for She carried a secret with her, buried to her core, that she knew would never let her be released from these nightmares.