Dreamer-sensei

A woman strolls alone by the banks of a river, treading the gray marble path at leisure as she gazes sideways towards the seemingly endless track of water which reaches the orange sky beyond the bridge in her sight.   She traces her fingers on the railings which separate the firm ground from the river; one, two, three—she's making motions with her two fingers as if they're walking on top of the metal fence, and continues to do so as she looks away from the bridge and treads her feet further away, as if both her feet and fingers were running away from the scenery of the sun being drowned by the horizon.   Haahh ...   She gasps, after a few dozen steps, and her motions come to a halt. On the other side of this fence, she thought, lied a world of freedom—a realm of liberation which would have offered her release from the gruesome days she had to claw her way through.   I'm glad I'm here.   That lone thought crosses her mind as she leans against the fence with both arms and inhales the humid warm air with all her might.   "I'M HEEEEREEEEEEE!!"   She screams, shooting out all of the air she just took in, along with all her feelings of relief, for she had triumphed over herself—not once or twice, but so many times that she wouldn't be able to count it with her slim fingers. Her voice blurs with the sounds of water battering the banks and the wails of flocks of birds flying over the river and beyond--a place she could've known, but refused, for she had won. She takes in the scenery once again, and the reflection of the dying sun looks so full of hope to her, thinking that each of the numerous glitters her eyes witness could be showing her a glimpse of a future she hadn't known.   "AAAAAHHHHHH!!!!"   Again, she screams, emptying her breath from the stomach--letting her abdominal muscles squeeze her insides dry of air, throwing away all of her blood-curling pain and setting them free. Tears gradually come out. The little droplets fall over on top of the iron bars--sometimes straight down the river. She goes on crying, for a while, ragging her breaths, until eventually her cheeks and the collar of her blouse are wet.   She rests her elbows on the fence, putting all her weight on them, and covers her face as she sobs quietly, as the reality of her present sinks in deeper and deeper into her mind.   "Free"   One word, delivered into the stuffy winds by her mild, wavering voice, unleashed upon the new world which she readily challenges, ready to bet on everything... -as she no longer has a thing to lose.   She steps away from the banks, walking away from the dangers of being swept away by the currents; further--on the other side of the stone path, a line of gray dividing the two worlds, and chooses to stay in the place where her feet can be planted firm. Her legs, drained of strength, barely led her to a nearby wooden bench lined up along the grassy fields a few meters away from the banks.   Sitting on one of such benches, she rests her back against the hard seat, thinking that this sensation would be part of her daily mishaps from now henceforth. Gently, she seals her eyelids, feeling that her blood is ragingly flowing through her veins, the pricks she feels inside her head forces her to slowly still her heaving breaths and abandon all the strength in her body.   Some time passed, and the twilight comes. The small frame between bright orange and pitch-black sky—a time where everything looks timid and pale as darkness gradually swallows the harbinger of light. As she witnesses the departing sun, engraving frame-to-frame moments with each tick of the clock into her heart, through her eyes, a memory jogged her mind agape.   “Ah …”   She thought, as if coming to understand—or to have finally found, an answer, of a mystery or riddle she had long shelved into the corners of her memories.   Memories, —of a time she can no longer relive.   “So, this is what you saw, that day—those days”, she mumbles to herself, quietly, like the uneventful ending of a lonely summer.   “Back then, I couldn’t even look you in the eye …”, she continues, as she pulls forth a scene out of her memories—of the life of her younger self.   I’m sorry. The thought crossed her wandering mind, but her lips failed to cast it away into the winds.   She blows a heavy breath, trying to cast away the mixed thoughts running in her head—of how she felt before meeting that person, of how the world looked in her eyes before those short days of seeing that person, and of words of gratitude she can’t express to him.   “I am who I am today, because that day, you were there”, she lifts her head, her voice becomes much clearer, stronger.   “Though I can’t repay you for this debt—“, she stands, clenching her fists firmly, unwavering.   “—I will be sure to remember your words, and live strongly”   As she stares into the blackness afar, up above, she notices that the Goddess Artemis is staring down at the world with her warm, loving light.   “Hm~”   The ends of her lips curved, ever so slightly, at the moment she stares back at the Goddess.   “Somewhere, you must be looking at this same scenery. Knowing you, who skipped dinner and camp’s folk dance altogether just to look at that humongous chunk of floating rock …”   A heavy breath of resignment blows out of her mouth, as if saying “ah, this is how it is”, thinking about the person in her memory.   “Really, that person is beyond changing. Men are so whimsy that I can’t fathom them, even today as I am now”   Deeper, further, her lips curve. She turns sideways, turning her back against the bridge she stared at when she came—ultimately treading her way back, on the marble path, along the riverbank.   Thank you so much, whoever your name was. I’m fine now. So, let’s meet again, someday, somewhere, and I’m sure… I can properly look you in the eye this time.   She walks away, the steady claps of her heels gradually drift into the distance, further, into the midst of a swirling maelstrom of noises. As the night wind blows sideways, her chest-length hair dances along with the rhythm of the whimsy summer-end breeze—sometimes playful, sometimes unforgiving, and most of the times, desolating.