Her King Of Shadows

Chapter V.

She couldn’t tell her father. She was afraid to close her eyes. She didn’t dare to admit she was afraid of the dark. From that night in the swamp it followed her. She didn’t answer any questions for them. A part of her wanted to tell them what happened. But the child in her doubted they would believe her. She wasn’t sure herself what actually happened. When she opened her eyes, all that she could see was the dark. Someone carried her back. Someone strong returned her to her father. And she closed her eyes again because it was ordered for her to do. And the next person she saw was Davon. And she could pretend it was all a dream. No one came to her chambers. No one tried to hurt her. And every time they would ask her a question she would just waive her head. Even though she had bruises and scratches, her body refused to admit the truth. Nothing happened. Everything was fine. The pain in her body was just a nightmare which will not happen again.

Now she sat in her father's library. And he tried too much to keep her out of this room. But now he wanted to have her close. Never leave her alone. It was different that night. After calling her to the library and giving her her favorite book from the shelf, he and Davon left. She sat in a giant armchair next to the fire in the fireplace. She had a book with fairy tales she started to read that winter. There was a cup of tea on her father's writing desk waiting for her. But Shana could not find any comfort in her favorite things anymore. Darkness was coming for her. She could already notice it gathering between the shelves. Darkness was getting harder and larger.

Shana pretended not to notice what was happening. She pretended to read her book which she held close. And when the darkness turned into a warrior she pretended not to be scared. She heard steps. Heavy steps which reminded her of the swamp. She looked towards the door of the library but no one opened it. Father and Davon will not return. Her heart told her they had left her here on purpose. They had left her because they knew darkness was coming. They have fled. Warrior was in front of her now and she didn’t even hear him coming. And even though the fire was strong, his body somehow stood almost in shadow. She looked at him with the eyes of the child she was. Araphel realized that for a very long time no one looked at him like her. It was a girl in front of him. Sitting in an armchair, she seemed even smaller than she was.

That night in the swamp he decided not to look at her. He just wrapped her in the warmth of his coat and raised her from the mud. Refused to see her. But this time that could not be avoided. She had a simple white dress on. Will there be time for her to wear black in mourning? Her face was pale. Too serious for someone her age. Dark hair fell on her shoulders in waves. Dark eyes. Much darker than he could have imagined. It surprised him more than anything else. It was so easy to see him in them. And much more than that. It was easy to see everything he could become. And he found his heart beating faster. It must have been a mistake. His heart was in a far away, different, unknown place. It was impossible for his heart to be in this room with this girl who looked at him with those dark eyes.

The eyes in which he saw the moon, stars, entire galaxies of space. And in the middle of that flame and coldness he saw himself. His body wanted to leave immediately but his reason forced him to stay. Cruelty wanted him back to reality. It was only a girl in front of him after all. A girl and nothing more. He sat in the other armchair looking at her. Wanting to know what is in front of him. Trying to find traces of Alexandra in that small person in a white dress. But if Alexandra was ever in her heart, she wasn’t there now.

-Do you know who I am?-he asked her quietly. He was still talking to a child. His heart told him it would be time to hate. She just nodded her head. He waited for when she would say his name but that didn’t happen. Icy wind ruled the room, even all the windows were closed. That same wind moved her armchair to his. Her knees almost touched his. She was still sitting calmly. Dark eyes dared to look at him. And they recognized him. But not since last night. They recognized him from a night long time ago. When this child was only four,

-I promised I will not tell.-she whispered. He nodded his head. It was a good decision. Promises were there with a reason. And they both knew her life would end that moment if she had broken it.

-I had to be sure.-he explained his test. She didn’t answer. She just kept looking at him.

-You said I will not see you again.-she reminded him. He knew that he didn’t dare to move. He knew that she would not say a word if he scared her even more. But that voice. He didn’t know if it was because of him. That voice seemed as if it was carried by centuries. It was the voice of his people. She was a child of his people. Surrounded by this ruin of a fort and the disappointment of a father.

-I was wrong.-he said calmly. As if it wasn’t a first time to admit defeat. But he could admit it to her a thousand times and it would cost him nothing. It wasn’t Alexandra in front of him. Now he could understand. It was her gift. It was all she could give to the world. Everything she was ready to defend that night she died.

-Are you scared?-a part of him had to know. And he didn’t wait long. She nodded her head. Dark eyes filled with tears. Blade and the darkness. Where could she run this time? Behind her was the blade. In front of her was darkness. As if her life was a vicious circle and each time she would face a different enemy. He waved his head as if disappointed with her confession.

-You should not be afraid, Shana. Didn’t they tell you that fear would make it hurt even more?-he enjoyed saying that. He noticed a slight tremble in her shoulders. His words had an effect on her.

-Will you help me?-she dared to ask. Dark eyes looked at the emerald ones. They were so small in them.

-It depends.-he said.

-It depends on what?-she wanted to know. He looked around the room they were sitting in.

-Are you ready to leave all this? Are you ready to leave your father and brother never to see them again? If you do that much, I will help you.-it was his offer. But it was a price a child could not understand. Which a child could not pay. She closed the book in her hands. Was it on her to finish this conversation? She tried to stand up but he grabbed her by the hand. Shana looked at his fingers holding her tight. Blood ruby sparkled in her dark eyes. Reminded her of things and stories she could not bear to witness. Trying to tell her that some other leader has a right to give her orders and make requests. The ring had whispered of a family far away which craved for her. Which loved her more than anything in the world. Sad voices begged her to come back. Sad voices pleaded to be comforted. The icy wind was back. Dark hair fell over her face. Even though she was just a girl, she was a part of his world. She didn't even know the darkness, yet there was strength in that frail body. Darkness that night fell to its knees.

-Will you help me as you have helped my mother?-she said to the blood ruby but it was spoken to him. And it was a blow he could not bear. And nobody had the right to hit him. He pulled his hand from her. A moment of honesty was gone. He stood up looking at her one last time.

-Then die. Nobody will cry for you.-he decided in his cruelty. He left before she could blink. As if he was never really there.