My Struggle

Prologue.

Prologue.

1976

And so the journey begins… I cannot seem to put my finger on it, but there are for reasons unknown to me, back in the good old seventies, long after the upheaval of both World Wars, the world, as I knew it, seemed to have transformed itself into a better place with the promise of much individuality and freedom.

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I opine that, in the air lived a continuous vibrant buzz that seemed to promise humankind more freedom! I thought that life was a party that could never end; well it certainly seemed that way!

Life was great back then, and everything in the world seemed so promising and beautiful with less madness. In addition, the surveillance concept of big brother watching you seemed so very implausible! I suppose that every generation will say the same as at the end of the day after witnessing the evil outcomes of our oppressive governments.

As individuals who have say, experienced the iconic era of the roaring forties that was defined by its big band sounds and formal defined fashion sense with a culture of male chivalry someone like me may overall rate those years as the being best years of their lives!

I first met the dapper Jung Bahadur back in the city of Jakarta, the capital city of Indonesia on a pre-planned city tour. The seating arrangements of the tour company called for us to sit next to each other in a luxury motor coach.

I still can remember him first engaging me in a rather in depth and eloquent manner about politics, but more specifically about politics in the country of South Africa , which just happens to be the land of my birth. We shared much lively conversation that spanned politics, the Colour Bar a*******d system and the pros and cons of capital punishment.

The Bahadur and I struck up an immediate friendship and at the end of the tour; he invited me to join him for lunch at his hotel, which was at the storied Hotel Indonesia.

Over a well laid out luncheon, we spoke about many lively and interesting topics including the sordid background of the Ghandi dynasty and its hidden connections to the Illuminati. This is a dynasty that lords over the people in the land of his birth, in the ancient sub continent called India.

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A few days later we spent the night at a lively smoke filled pub downstairs quaffing copious amounts of Bintang draft beer on tap and taking in the great music of a live five-piece band, whose rendition of “The Four Seasons” cover version of the song “December, 1963” I really enjoyed. The catchy words and tune of the song resonated and overwhelmed me so much so, that midway through the song, as much as I tried, I just could not resist dancing to the beat, so I took to the dance floor with a lovely girl in a red silk dress.

Now that “girl in red” was seated all on her lonesome next to me. She was innocently minding her own business, in a rather eloquent manner, until I politely intruded into her space and asked her to join me for a dance, “I believe that in these so called post modern feminists era many persons may label this innocent act as s****l harassment!”

Her strikingly elegant composure caught my eye from the get go. She seemed to add a special brand of glamour and glitz to the large square otherwise boring bar counter that served as a “ dumb valet for her purse and handbag” She courteously obliged me and we took to the floor. She sure knew how to dance with inspiring fluid motion and style.

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“ Drank too much last night!” I awoke the next morning with a hangover and spent the day lounging at the pool – side, after enjoying a spicy vegan style nasi goreng for breakfast. I washed down my breakfast with a copious amount of Perrier water laced with fresh lemon juice.

It was upon my first sip of pink gin and tonic at the pool - side that I felt my eyes explode as I became larger than life. I took in the Indonesian morning in slow motion and watched the world sail by in a haze of carefree light-headedness. I felt not a care in the world in my imagined invincible state of mind. I celebrated life, lost in the Indonesian minute!

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After midday, it was to be a quick refreshing cold shower and then I slipped into light cream coloured cotton Brooks Brother’s style business suit, as the heat of the day was oppressive.

I stepped out to face the world and it was business as usual.

The day proved to be a hectic Monday of business meetings. It was late in the afternoon when I called up the Bahadur at his hotel and invited him out for an evening meal and drinks at the trendy Tanamur nightclub. He graciously accepted my invitation and of course, my female friend, the “girl in red” whom I had met at the pub at the hotel accepted my invitation to join us as well.

Amid lively conversation, we wined, dined, and smoked cigarillos and sorbranes as we danced the night away with a few of the other trendy girls that we befriended at the glitzy nightclub.

The club’s seventies style, avant garde interior was decked out in rich woven cotton orange fabric that covered the seating’s, and the authentic white beech wood floors added to the contrast of highlighting the cannery yellow silk carpeted walls throughout the expanse of the club, which gave it a look and feel of warm opulent comfort.

The Bahadur had to attend a conference in Singapore, so we left the club a bit early… at dawn, “ wearing happy smiles!”

We caught a cab to his hotel where he dashed into the shower “ in and out,” then he slipped into a pair of white slacks, a blue polo shirt, as he grabbed his passport from the Elsafe, threw a few cloths items into a small French style carryall, and then we literally dashed downstairs and into the waiting taxicab.

We took turns in prompting Zulfigal who was our friendly cab driver that we recently befriended to engage in some low level flying to the Sakamo Hatta International Airport in order for the Bahadur to catch his 8.20 am Silk Air flight to Singapore. We reached the airport in record time.

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I spent the week in Jakarta immersed in wining and dining and conducting my business affairs until on Friday midday, I received a telephone call from the Bahadur, who invited me up to spend the weekend at his flat in Singapore.

I was about to politely decline his offer when I asked myself the question, what is it that I have to lose? I immediately accepted his gracious offer and we spent a weekend of wild partying both at numerous clubs, not least at the Raffles. We capped the early morning madness of fun at his beautifully appointed Orchard Road apartment, where we were later joined, by some of his other fun loving friends who also seemed to love and enjoy the nightlife perhaps a little bit more than we did!

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Come Monday we rode up to Singapore International Airport together as the Bahadur caught an earlier Air Garuda Indonesian flight light back to Jakarta for a day and then to his home in Bombay and I boarded a Boeing 747 home to New York City.

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Once settled into my routine at home, I tried calling the Bahadur at his Bombay residence but his assistant politely informed me that he was away on extended leave in Lake Titicaca in South America . I left a message for the Bahadur to contact me at his convenience. Over the course of three months, I did not hear from him at all! Until one day, unexpectedly whilst busy in my store I received a surprise call from the Bahadur. After exchanging customary pleasantries, the Bahadur surprised me by inviting me to his home in Bombay, and once I agreed to take up his offer, then he floored me by asking if I cared to join him on an overland expedition from South Africa to Egypt? It did not take me long to make up my mind especially when he mentioned my old home town in South Africa which brought back nostalgic memories!

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The Bahadur lived in a splendid bungalow in the Malabar district. The plants and trees in the Bahadur’s garden are planted in such a manner that it gave off a soothing Zen like effect on one’s mind upon its vision. There was a liberal sprinkling of fruit trees and other exotic plants.

His expansive garage housed two pale blue Rolls Royce’s and three gleaming Mercedes Benz cars . I spent many nights at the Bahadur’s bungalow and I had the great opportunity of meeting his beautiful princess, a drop-dead gorgeous girlfriend of whom I noticed first hand, how they shared a wonderful passionate but somewhat balanced relationship.

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Our entire trip from South Africa by road to Egypt lasted for two months and one day as we spent time along our travels with interesting people that we met all along the way.

We travelled along in a rugged Hino truck kited out with showers and a host of other creature comforts. We saw many an ancient ruins of Africa which are real and we passed by the great River Zambezi of I which I watched fall in perpetual motion in what is known as the Victoria Falls!

It was at the tail end of our expedition, each of us left from Cairo International Airport to our respective countries, but we made a promise that we would meet again. As per usual, but this time around it was to be much longer than anticipated as I had heard nothing from the Bahadur, for a whole five years! Despite my three initial unreturned telephone calls to his residence in as many months.

I had all but given up on ever seeing the Bahadur again especially here in my hometown, until one morning as I got to my store. I was completely surprised to see the Bahadur.

He cut a fine figure attired in a black pin stripped Hugo Boss suite waiting out at the entrance of my store. I got off the cab and immediately asked him to wipe the grin from his face as we stepped forward and warmly shook hands and then hugged each other.

I could not help but fire a barrage of questions at him! However, I received no answers, just what seemed to me to be a caring warm smile.

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The Bahadur spent a week with me living in my apartment, actually helping me out doing physical chores at home and at my store. I was amazed and I even told him so, because I was dumbfounded to see a playboy like him get his hands dirty! As per his new usual self, that I was slowly coming to grips with his new demeanour, he smiled without offering me an explanation to his newfound character.

I begged the Bahadur to go out pubbing and clubbing with me, but he politely declined my offer. I asked the Bahadur if he has contracted some sort of rare illness that caused him to refrain from having fun. However, he just shook his head with a smile. I was intrigued but decided not to push the issue and decided to let sleeping dogs lie. It is unlike that I was not curious to know why the Bahadur did not contact me for five whole years… and it is highly unlikely he did not receive my messages from his very competent assistant whose competence I experienced firsthand whilst spending time at his home.

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As the Bahadur was about to board, his flight back home he thanked me for my great hospitality and then he did something that I found to be out of the ordinary! He handed me a sealed white banker’s envelope and asked me to open it once he had boarded his flight!

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Taken aback by his unusual gesture, I placed the envelope securely in my tweed jacket’s inner pocket, gave him one last wave, as I turned away from him and walked out the departure hall. I caught a cab immersed throughout my ride home with all sorts of thoughts running through my mind!

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I showered and then poured myself a glass of S auvignon Blanc de Blanc. I carefully opened the envelope, not knowing what to expect. Within the envelope was an Ariston watermarked note attached to what looked like a plane ticket. I looked at the short handwritten note. I opine that the note was carefully worded, written out succinctly with a fountain pen, whose steady cursive writing that read simply…

Dear Friend

Please find enclosed a return ticket to Bombay for the 29 th day of July, which is the next month. I would like you to join me at my residence for two days. I will understand if you cannot make it especially at such short notice.

In addition to the note’s curious wording it was signed off as…

“ Your friend”

“ JB”

I read the note again as I reached for a cigarillo. I could not make head or tail of it. I had some strange thoughts run through my head, one of which was, was the Bahadur unwell? When I stopped to think about it, of recent, I did find his behaviour a bit odd to say the least!

I felt that I owed it to our friendship to comply with the Bahadurs wishes!

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The Bahadur was much pleased to see me arrive at his home. I must add that he looked fine, healthy, and happy! I noticed that his home was devoid of its usual rich clutter and staff compliment, but I decided not to say anything about the minimalist look.

The Bahadurs girlfriend was present of whom he affectionately referred to as his princess and she as per usual looked radiant and happy too!

It was over a simple vegan dinner that the Bahadur had prepared by himself, the Bahadur finally brought me up to speed on the new developments in his life. He carefully with a select choice of words told me that five years ago he had a life threatening motor vehicle accident that made him re-evaluate and to question his life and his sole purpose here on the earth!

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He told me that he took a well thought out decision to renounce all forms of materialism and to become a sannyasi!

“ I have abandoned all claims to social and family standing.” “That is to say that I have chosen to live in a world without the intoxication of money, power and prestige.” “As I am sure that you are aware that a sannyasi cannot be the head of a household although there are some known exceptions.” He continued that for almost five years he had engaged an ascetic teacher that taught him how to renounce all forms of worldly deceptions and got him ready to enter into the wilderness in order for him to live with nature.

Then he dropped the bombshell! By stating that, “The Bahadur that I once knew had died!”

“ What!” “I could not believe my ears!” “He went on to say that he was not the same person that I once knew. He informed me that he had become a completely new purer entity” He looked at me in the eye as he told me with deep emotion that “in the morning when dawn arrives he would don a simple pure cotton hand-woven loincloth and then head into the jungle never to return into this civilization!”

All I could do was to look at him as I felt a sense of blank take over and numb my mind.

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It was to be within the c***k of dawn when we rode down with the Bahadur to the edge of the urban sprawl. This is where the smog and neon lights turned to wood. He carefully removed and then slowly handed to his Princess the signet 18-karat gold ring that he wore on his pinkie finger. Then, with a faraway look in his eyes, he just as carefully removed his custom-made Blaken style diamond encrusted Rolex Perpetual Oyster watch from his wrist and handed it to me.

We stood transfixed in the chill of that smog-filled morning, each consumed with our own thoughts I guess. I thought deeply about this complex world and my struggle, which is a struggle to understand this world as we know to be with it’s every meaning and facet.

The great one without saying a word, he slowly turned around and cut through the smog and heavy silence that hung in the air… without saying any goodbyes.

The Bahadur slowly walked away from us never looking back…

We watched him walk away with a proud stature as he took confident long but slow strides, walking into the jungle that stood there in all her mysteriously glory and elegance.

The timeless jungle like the ocean was there waiting ever so patiently for him? And who knows…? “ Perhaps someday she awaits the entire world! ” Watching this scene play out brought a burning nostalgic craving for de-urbanisation that consumed me like fire!

He allowed the endless jungle to swallow up his lonesome self! I may not have realized it back then but my struggle for deep answers to my many complex questions had just began!