What Do I Call You?

Chapter Nineteen

It was never going to be easy from here on.

I tried to think over what just happened when I got back to the motel after I dropped Nari off by her house this afternoon. The entire reality was still not sinking in. Did she just agree to date me? She just did, right? Then why am I feeling so disappointed all of a sudden? Shouldn’t I be rejoicing now and celebrating myself for being able to achieve what I really went here for?

Ten years of searching for that girl… Ten years of feeling so out of myself that I almost withdrew from the world. I was in love with that woman for years and had nursed a sorrowful emptiness for too long I had even forgotten how to feel anything else… And now, my wish has been already granted. So why am I acting like this? I don’t get it.

Did I just lose all the sense of infatuation towards Nari? No, I don’t really think so. I still want her to love me. I could still feel my heart beating so loud when I saw her turning around and looked at me for one last time before she had walked away and went inside her house, leaving me watching her from the driver's seat of my car a while ago. The feeling was still strong… So I don’t think it would be about that. Yet something else was still making me uneasy. And for some reason, I just have to do something about it. Maybe now is really the best time to check that document I had requested from Hudson earlier. It might be all because of that and the fact that there was still a mysterious connection between this town and my family’s business.

Musing and feeling troubled by these things, I stretched an arm across my bed from where I had been sitting in the middle and reached out for my phone on the bedside table. Opening the email content of my account, I was almost ready to read what Hudson had sent me when the phone suddenly vibrated in my hand and the screen flashed my father’s name.

How funny, though. He seemed to have sensed what I was about to do. It is kind of weird and I chuckled bitterly as I contemplated for a few seconds, letting it rung for a while before I finally took a deep breath and answered it on the fifth ring.

“Did you go to the old mansion?”

Unbelievable. I instantly felt cold and my body reflexively froze upon hearing his opening question. It was like a bullet shot at me. I totally lost all my ability to speak all of a sudden and it had me wondering with complete suspicion. How in the hell did he know something about that? What the hell?

“Why are you asking?” I tried to break my silence and gripped the phone against my ear so hard I could almost break it.

“I just want to make sure you’re holding on to your promise,” father told me back and I was puzzled with his answer. What was I going to the old mansion had anything to do with the promise I just made? And who told him? It could not be possibly Nari, she does not know him at all. Nobody had seen us today. Was it Henry then? But how can he know my father?

“What if I did go there?”

My father didn’t say anything back after that but I could almost feel him looming from the other end of the line. I was just glad I wasn’t really in front of him while we were having this conversation.

“I would have to ask you why.”

“Did you have me under surveillance again?”

That must be it if anything else was impossible. But I don’t think that could have happened as well. I would have figured it out all the way from the diner and I would have noticed someone watching us back. But I still don’t know my father that well to be so sure. I guess, there are quite a few things that I need to check about him too… In reference to his connection with this town as well. Something is really fishy about it.

“Will there be a reason that I have to?”

His vague reply had me more troubled and conscious of the possibilities. But I tried not to be swayed by his psychological attempt to make me confirm his doubts anyway. I was already prepared for everything he might throw my way now.

“I was actually thinking of staying there next week,” I replied back easily, and the moment I had spoken out the idea, the more it had become entirely plausible for me to do. I could actually really use that as an excuse to stay much longer near the town. “Would that be a problem?”

“Did you talk to Hudson?”

“What do you mean?” I almost choke out my words after hearing him ask that but I luckily avoided it.

“How long are you going to stay there, Taiyo? Our business isn’t going to keep profiting with you acting like this.”

The insinuating tone of his voice really got me riling up as I pondered over his questions. Why did he suddenly ask about Hudson? Did he actually find us out? How in the hell? But it’s unlikely to happen. There is no way he would have found us out this fast. But why does it feel like I’m being interrogated for some reason? I do get why he had to worry about the company, but it was not really as if not being in the office and taking care of things here instead would totally make any difference. I was already under the impression that people are putting pressure on me but then, I was still doing my part in any I can. I was not slacking off, business-wise. So, why was he calling me so suddenly just to remind me of these things? He wasn’t like this before, he has never pried on what I was doing all this time until I set foot in this town. It’s really getting more suspicious.

“I won’t be coming back anytime soon, father,” I firmly responded to him, not even wavering as I went on, “I still have something to do here.”

“You’re still not forgetting our deal, right?”

Why does he keep reminding me that? But then, I already broke the deal. Though it wasn’t like I was going to tell him anyway. I know it would just take a matter of time before he eventually finds it all out and chase me down to hell. But while I was still not being caught in the act, I just have to keep on hiding from his eyes and digging down the dirt while I still can.

“I’m not,” I lied without even feeling any guilt, and it actually surprised me that I was brave enough to do this to my own father. “Don’t worry.”

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The next day I was again driving my way towards Nari’s house to pay her a visit. I had decided that since things had already set its motion between us, I just have to make the most of it now.

Nari has already agreed to date me and this was my biggest chance to prove what I really felt about her. However, I have already expected that it will not be as easy as I think it might be, considering that her approval was kind of forced out from her. I don’t really understand why this town being a property of our family was a big thing for her and she even sounded like I was not allowed to delve into the whole secrecy anymore. But then, I have always been the type of person who can be intolerably stubborn when I want to be, especially when things really mattered to me. And this time, it matters even more because Nari was involved somehow.

Reaching the familiar driveway, I pulled over by the front of the house and turned the engine off. I took a deep breath to muster enough courage while I was still thinking of a way to greet the person who might welcome me once I knocked on the door. It would most likely be Nari anyway. Just thinking about it, I can already imagine the scowl on her face that she will automatically give me once she finally sees me in front of their door. I chuckled to myself over the thought. I just can’t help it, she could still be just adorable despite that overtly hostile attitude.

I got out of the car, feeling quite even less nervous now as I enjoyed calmly breathe in the breeze of the wind under the blaring sun. The summer season is way more refreshing in this town than being in the city. I do get why people prefer a suburban vacation and going to a beach rather than stay in the city when the season is coming, you could totally change a whole new perspective just by enjoying it at a place that has lesser pollution and is much more graced with nature. I walked up until I reach the front steps of the porch, slowing my pace as I cleared my throat before proceeding to knock. The moment the door finally opened after I softly tapped three times on the wooden material, Bryan appeared before me.

He looked up, his eyes scanning my entire look, and scowled at my face. His expression really looked funny because of how it resembled Nari’s. I could not even resist my chuckle as I looked down at his unwelcoming glare.

“Good day.”

“My sister’s not here. I’m sorry.” He turned to close the door on me but I gently blocked the attempt by wedging a foot against the door frame. I held the side of the door with one hand and tried so hard to give the kid a hopeful smile. I was not expecting that he was going to reject me like this so directly, but I guess the hostile attitude can be quite hereditary. Not that it was a bad thing at all, I can understand that the kid was just trying to protect her sister from me… Who, to admit is still a suspicious person to him after all.

“Er… Is your mom there?”

The kid stopped pushing the door against my resistance and stared up at me as he paused. He regarded me with a skeptical look for a quick second as he raised a brow. It was cute, but it was still not helping me at this point.

“Why?” he asked me with a doubtful voice.

“Well… I just…” I trailed off, thinking of a good enough reason to survive this intense interrogation, “I just want to see how she’s doing. I’m visiting her.”

“You’re visiting mom?”

“Y-yeah.”

The small kid assessed me with his eyes for quite a long moment first before he quietly moved back and disappeared, leaving the front door open ajar. I awkwardly waited, a little confused, but still stood there patiently. And finally, after a few minutes, the small kid appeared again and gave me a blank stare.

“She said you could come in,” he told me and as soon as he did, he left me again. Without a word, I took it as a cue to come in.

It was a pleasant way to distract my mind off from things when I finally saw Maria’s face again. I don’t know but there was just something in her very warm smile and that motherly look that she gave me that had me feeling serene inside as if I was sincerely being taken care of. Her warm hospitality cured me of all the mental blows I have been suffering from these past few days. Maria was like a breath of fresh air and it really calmed me away from my stormy angst.

“You came back,” she told me this after she immediately motioned me to walk into their house. She led me straight to the dining hall for some tea, just like the last time. I sat again on the same seat I had taken before and watched her do her brewing. The windows by the sink of their kitchen were left opened and it had let in the breeze of cold air into the room, making me breathe in the refreshing soft wind.

“I thought you’d never visit again,” she added this and I turned to glance around the place as she continued making the tea. “Bryan actually slipped out the last time you came here to Nari. I tried my best to lie but then…”

I chuckled at her statement, and it was not really that significant to clear out anyway. However, she sounded really troubled over it and I tried to reassure her.

“She went to meet with me yesterday,” I briefly shared with Maria and she jolted as she gave me a look over her shoulder. She stopped moving and stared at me with a raised brow.

“She did?”

I let out another chuckle, replying, “Yeah. It wasn’t really a very long moment but we somehow sorted out the deal between us and we ended up making an agreement.”

Sordid as it may seem, I felt totally comfortable with sharing these things with Maria all of a sudden. She doesn’t really seem like the type of person who judges other people that weakly and it was actually refreshing to be able to tell things about myself to someone who was a stranger. It lessens the insecurity and hesitance to be more honest about myself and it makes me feel quite relieved of the weight of all my worries.

“An agreement?”

Maria turned off the electric kettle when it flashed the boiling indicator and took out two cups from a drawer beside her. As she carefully set the teabags on each cup, I sighed and looked towards the window.

“Yeah, it was the kind that—“

The sudden sound of a squeaking door from the living room immediately cut me off as I tensed on my seat, feeling the prickling of the hair on my nape. Maria also paused, the kettle on her hand raised midway above a cup. It was the front door. And by knowing that, it just only means…

“Mom? Bryan?” Nari’s voice echoed across the living room and it reverberated into the opened entryway by the dining area. I already knew it was her even before she spoke over the silence. I gulped nervously and I saw Maria slowly settling the kettle down on the counter and her back slumping as she sighed.

She must be thinking of how to work out this one, Nari would totally flip out once she sees me here inside. Just one step into the hall…

“Bryan?”

Another door opened in a bang followed by skittering footsteps as I heard the young kid’s squeal running across the hallway into the living room.

“Nari!” Bryan’s shout was very vivid and clear as it echoed all over the place and it just added more fuel to my overflowing nervousness. Maria glanced at me and our eyes met, sharing a sympathetic smile to each other. For some reason, we actually understand what might happen afterward. I was completely glued to my seat, my mind totally blanked. I guess this is now the time for me to think of an excuse or maybe a possible escape before Nari finds me here. But then, I don’t think I could even move. I was more than afraid to even make noise than to save myself from the upcoming terror.

“Someone’s here.” I heard Bryan said this to Nari and I gritted my teeth, trying to bite back a curse. Leave it to the kid to spill the beans. He must really hate me that much.

“Someone?”

“He said he’s your friend.”

A long silence followed that and I gulped again, and this time it was loud enough to be heard by Maria. She gave me a pointed look.

“Where’s he?” Nari finally asked in a calm yet eerie regard. I can practically picture her face when she said that. I was completely doomed, I was sure of it now.

“At the kitchen with mom.”

The next few seconds felt like minutes when it went on as I waited for her inevitable entrance. I did not even realize that I was fisting my hands so aggressively that both of my knuckles had turned white. It was not that hot, but I felt my entire body sweating. Maria froze by the counter, the tea was already left untreated. I was feeling a dozen whirling emotions weighing down to my chest and my mind remained blank.

I could sense the footsteps coming closer and not long after, Nari’s silhouette finally appeared by the hallway of the kitchen. I turned my head with eyes slowly darting over my shoulder after feeling her cold presence and our eyes instantly met. Her face said it all.

Maybe coming here was never really a good idea in the first place.

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“What the hell are you doing here?”

Nari looked at me with what I could already regard as the deathliest glare she has given me since the night I had appeared in her life. She was already wearing an intense stare right after she took notice of me sitting in front of the table in their dining area. She stopped by the entryway from the living room with Bryan beside her and stood with apparent grim on her face. I was still numbed by silence as I felt cold inside as if I was actually caught doing something I should not have. I slowly turned towards Maria and quietly sought back-up but she was still staring at Nari. Her eyes were widened and she looked a bit nervous.

“Why are you here, Taiyo?” Nari’s gritted demand had me jolting from my seat as I immediately returned my eyes to her. My throat went dry when her stare clashed into mine again.

“V-visiting?”

“You need to leave,” she quickly approached me and pulled my arm to remove me from my seat. I stumbled as I stood, letting her force swayed me towards her and she led me back to the living room. I was defenseless and was so lost in a whim as I strutted behind her until we paused by the front door. She turned around and faced me, her eyes narrowing into slits as she regarded me with heavy distaste.

“We talked already, right?” she spitefully remarked, her grip on my forearm tightening as she spoke, “I’ve agreed to a date. Why are you here now?”

She kept glancing alarmingly behind her and I wondered why she suddenly looked like she was trying to hide something. I frowned at her and only then did I finally regain my ability to speak.

“I’m just visiting,” I calmly replied to her, pulling my arm gently from her hold yet she still did not let go.

“For what?” she spat back.

“Relax, Nari,” I reassured her, smiling uneasily but her eyes kept darting back over her shoulders. “Why are you acting like this? I’m not doing anything wrong.”

“Why didn’t you tell me you were going here today?”

“I don’t have your number.”

“Fine,” she sighed in surrender, her whole body collapsing into a look of complete surrender that I suddenly began to feel a bit suspicious of why she was actually acting like this. “I’d give it to you but you really need to leave now.”

“Why?”

“Because—“

“Why did you bring that guy here, Nari?”

Maria’s voice appeared behind us and it immediately cut Nari off as we both turned to look at her. She was giving Nari a warning glare and her arms were crossed in front of her.

“Guy? Me?” I frowned, puzzled over Maria’s question. I glanced back to my side to give Nari a questioning look but she ignored me as she returned Maria’s stare.

“Why is Ren here?”

Ren? That guy? He’s here?

“It just happened, Mom,” Nari merely explained, her grip loosening on my arm and she finally let go of me after speaking. She really looked helpless and I could not help but feel the same as I kept mulling over the thought that she brought that guy here to her place.

“Just happened? What is he to you?” I suddenly asked, unable to mask my jealousy as I stared her down and waited for her to explain. Nari faced me upon my demands and angrily met my eyes. Shooting me a cold look, she spat back.

“It’s none of your business.”

“Is he your boyfriend?”

She just narrowed her eyes and glared back at me.

I was suddenly driven by impatience when she did not even try to answer my question. I tried to bite back the words I was about to say and gently shoved her away from the front door. Before she could even stop me, I was already exiting their house and sharply walked towards the driveway. I almost did not want to believe it but I quickly saw the Ren guy leaning on the side of his car just at the front of the house. And seemingly unable to stop me anymore, my entire vision went dark right after that.

“Taiyo!”

I did not see the punch coming back at me when it hit me on the side of my face. I was automatically pushed down on the ground by the sudden impact and my teeth banged against each other as I felt my head smacking down on the floor. Instantly, I saw Ren charging down towards me and I quickly raised my arms up to shield my face. Everything just happened so fast and we ended up rolling over the weeds on the front yard of Nari’s house until her voice finally registered into the background. Only was then did I finally came back to my senses and stopped.

Ren still landed another heavy punch on me before he finally pulled away and kicked me once more as he stepped back. I was panting hard and my throat was totally dried up. I closed my eyes, my entire face was numb. I could not even open my eyes steadily into the view of the sky above me. I was still lying on the ground when Nari came into my vision. She was looking down at me, her eyes were filled with fury and disappointment.

I almost thought she was crying, but she started sputtering angry words at me and Ren.

“Ren! What the hell is wrong with the two of you!” she shouted so loud I immediately regretted all of my actions. Feeling so tired, I closed my eyes and tried to catch my breath. I felt pain all over my face and my shoulders. Ren stood from a distance and Nari continued to reprimand both of us.

“This is so stupid!” she spat with a huff, her frustration apparent in her loud voice. “You’re not kids anymore!”

“He started it,” I heard Ren grimly replied back to her, his voice a little shaky as he wiped the side of his mouth that has been bleeding. I just kept my silence as I heaved and tried to push myself off the ground. But I still struggled to sit up, feeling my upper body almost giving away from the soreness all over it. I grunted and Nari somehow stopped her nagging.

“I need you to leave, for now, Ren,” She softly pleaded to the other guy and I snapped my head towards her, surprised that she was actually making him leave not me.

“What?”

“Just for now, please,” she said with a pleading tone and Ren hesitated for a moment as they continued to stare at each other. I just silently watched it with pure distaste and after a long moment, Ren finally let out a long sigh and retreated back to his car.

“I’ll wait for you tonight, Nari,” was all he said before eventually leaving the place. I was still mulling over his last words when Nari suddenly appeared above me and our eyes met as she regarded how bad I looked now.

“How stupid can you actually get?” she said in a rhetoric remark and I smiled bitterly, feeling quite embarrassed now that things had finally sunk in. I grunted once again, trying to push myself up to stand but I wobbled and almost stumbled back on my butt. Nari reflexively rushed to my side and wrapped her arms around my shoulder and chest. Her sudden proximity had me staggering a step back but she held onto my body tighter as she managed us to turn back towards their house. I could not even stop myself from blushing as we started to walk side by side.

“No reason to feel shy for you now. You’ve made a lot of bad impressions already,” she said, slightly speaking in a teasing tone as I kept my silent, unable to even muster any words as of the moment. I still was lapsing in the feeling of her warmth on the side of my body.

When we got inside the house, she quickly guided me towards their sofa and I sat quietly, wincing when I felt the burning pain on the side of my cheek.

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