How Lost Souls Love

You are my Sunshine

Dax POV

As we walk through the door we hear Noah struggling to stay calm. “Maisie! Calm down it’s just dad!”

“GET OFF ME!” 

Maisies screams and pleading echo through the whole house. 

Shit..

Lottos moving through the house and through the hall to her door in an instant with me hot on his heels. 

He stops in the doorway and I don’t understand why he does. maisie needs us. She needs me. 

I try to push past him but he slams his hand against my chest keeping me back. I push harder and try to pull him from me but he glares down at me 

“Relax Dax. He’s got this.” He says to me. His face is a little pissed off and I can’t tell if it’s directed at me or just the overall take on this entire stupid day. So I turn back to look at Maisie in the room. 

I can’t actually see her. She’s on the floor on the opposite side of her bed and Noah is crouched in front of her. She’s calmer than the screaming we heard when we came in the house. 

I can hear Maisie taking shuddering breaths. And I look closer and see Noah. He’s saying something to her. I look closer… he’s not talking. He’s singing. And he’s crying for his sisters pain. 

Lotto relaxes and smiles at them. He doesn’t look worried anymore. 

Maisie sobs a little again and springs up to wrap her arms around her brother. She whispers a thank you while Noah holds onto her rubbing her back. 

Watching them reminds me of just how unbreakable their bond is. Even when Noah and I had been best friends almost our whole lives, whenever Maisie was here she came first. 

When she  was back home they called each other everyday. And if something was bugging Noah Maisie was there for him. If something was wrong with Maisie Noah was moving heaven and earth to make it better.  

As much as I wanted to be there for Maisie. She didn’t need me right now. She needed the brother that would be there for her always. So I took a step back and gave Lotto a smile. 

I’d text Maisie later tonight and make sure she was ok. But for right now Noah and Lotto have got her covered. 

Maisie. POV

When I was 7 I visited Noah. He was having a hard time adjusting in his new middle school. He told me all about how kids made fun of him because his mom didn’t want him. My brother was always my rock. We might have been born a year apart but our emotions and bond were united as if we were twins. I could feel how badly it was hurting him inside. And I wanted nothing more than to make it better. 

My words were useless. I couldn’t fix the hurt inside him and in turn it was breaking something inside me too. 

We had a bear. Something we shared. And when you pressed his tummy he’d sing a song. On the day my big brothers heart was breaking and I couldn’t fix it, on the day I saw my big brother cry for the first time, I grabbed that bear and pressed his tummy. 

Noah’s face smiled a little and I could feel that flicker of happiness and laughter that always came when we were together. 

From that day on, that little bear was our lucky charm until his battery died when we were 16. We looked everywhere trying to get a new battery but the bear was so old it just couldn’t be done. 

In the moment of my flashback I was trying as hard as I could to get away, when I heard it. I heard Noah. He was whispering our song and doing the only thing he knew how to do. 

“You are my sunshine….

My only sunshine….

You make me happy.. when skies are grey..” He choked. 

I could tell Noah was crying too. He was my big brother. My sworn protector and in this moment I was being attacked and mauled over by something he couldn’t see, hear, feel or touch. There was nothing he could do for me. He could feel my pain inside of him like I felt his and he knew how broken I was. 

So he sang our song. Just begging me to come back to him. 

“Youll.. nev-never.. kn-know dear..” I tried whispering back. 

The man I thought was attacking me flickered in and out in front of me. I could see that day in my mind. Noah and me curled up together under the tree in the park we used to play at down the street. Both crying together as we remembered that we’d always have each other. 

I reached out my fingers to Noah and we both finished the song together. 

“How much I love you… please don’t take my sunshine away.” We finished. 

My eyes were now back to reality. Sobs escaped me as I looked up to see a Noah’s heartbroken and tear streaked face. 

He just wanted to help. And by not being honest with him.. I deprived him of the one thing we always promised each other we’d do. 

I wouldn’t let him be there for me. 

I threw my arms around his neck and just let go. Noah hugged me tighter than he ever had before and buried his head in my neck.

“Maisie..” my dad says as he walks into the room and places a hand on my head. After a few seconds I look up to meet his gaze. Hot tears still running from my eyes. “It’s time sweetheart. He needs to know. You think you have been protecting him, but Noah has been carrying your pain around since that day almost as much as you have. He just wants to be there for you baby.. it’s time to let him.” 

I cry even more as I listen. Noah’s face is still twisted with sadness and worry. But his eyes tell me that he’s hoping I finally tell him. He wants to be here for me. And I need to let him. 

So after a few deep breaths, i start at the beginning...

FIVE MONTHS EARLIER

I was exhausted. I was climbing the last flight of stairs to our apartment from a long night out in NYC with my friends. Compared to most adventures we go on tonight was pretty chill. 

I stepped out onto our floor and fished in my bag for my house keys. My headphones where in and playing a throwback Jonas Brothers song that I still absolutely loved. I was humming along when I pushed the door open and stepped through. 

I paused for a second.. it was pitch black. That’s strange mom usually leaves a light on for me when I come home this late.

I locked the door behind me and turned into the darkness. I blink several times trying to adjust my eyes as I fumble for the lamp that I knew was in the corner next to the door. Instead of finding the lamp my feet slide around under me forcing me to fall on my hands and knees. 

“What the hell!” I yell as pain shoots through my palms. I pull my earbuds out of my ear and wince. 

I reach around for the lamp again but realise finally that it’s just not there... It wasnt there. Alright.. plan B. I stand gingerly and walk into the kitchen area to the left and flip on the switch. 

 I hear by boots making crunching sounds under my steps. And as I flick the light on, a breeze sweeps across my face. The big window that leads to the fire escape is open. Wide open. 

My heart does a weird flip as I take in the rest of the room. Our house is trashed. Our furniture is cut open. The lamp I was looking for is laying across the floor on the opposite side of the room. 

Our flat screen and stereo systems are missing and our little nick-nacks are thrown around and shattered through the room. 

Looking around the kitchen I see every cupboard open. Glasses and plates are shattered everywhere. Our standing wine rack that was in the corner of the kitchen was tipped over and shattered, the smell of different wines mixing together in puddles on the floor clouded my head and overpowered my nose. 

“What the fuck..” I say out loud. 

Then I hear a sick twisted laughing from the makeshift bedroom of my mother’s. I look over to the room and see one of her ex boyfriends watching me as I take in his handy work. 

“Maisie baby. Your not supposed to be home.” He sneeres. I look at his short frame. He’s smaller than me but ten times as crazy. His black hair is unkept and his eyes are bloodshot red. I don’t remember this guys name. But I remember his attitude. He was a puss poor drunk that likes to slap my mom around when she was “defiant” as he liked to say. A sickening feeling finds m as I remember his abuse.. 

Where’s my mom? She should be home..

“Get the hell out of my house!” I yelled pointing to the door. 

My bedroom door opened as a second person walked out behind me and I screamed. I stumbled back and fell on my ass. Before I knew what was happening the man I didn’t recognize had climbed over me pressing me down against the hardwood floor. The spilled wine soaking into the fabric of my clothing. 

“Who’s this?” The man on top of me chuckles. I’m fighting to get control of my wrists back, I can feel glass digging into them as I twist and jerk. The man on top of me sniffs at my hair and then licks my ear. Suddenly I feel a very different fear. The adrenaline rush to get free allows me to pull my hands lose. 

“Calm down now little girl. Ain’t no one gonna hurt you.” He laughs trying to catch my wrists again. He’s getting agitated that I won’t sit still and I realize that I have to fight. I have to keep fighting. 

“Get off me!” I screamed. Flailing my arms, twisting and writhing to try and get away.  Then a sharp pain to my torso and I screamed bloody murder. 

A swift punch to the side of my face and I almost blacked out.  I felt a fist connect with the side of my face again and again in both directions. But I wouldn’t give in.  I kicked and screamed feeling broken shards of glass cutting my arms as I struggled. But I couldn’t give up. I had to find mom. I had to find mom!

I pulled my arms up as hard and fast as I could until I had the upper hand and then I dug my thumbnails into my attackers eyes. Screaming as another swipe of his arms sent a sting of pain down my arm. 

He cried out in frustration and leaned back just far enough for me to sit up, I grabbed a shard of glass and swung I till I made contact with his arm, with a hard push he fell off me to his side. he screamed and scrambled trying to grab for my ankles. I ran to my room barely escaping his reach, slamming the door behind me I locked the door as fast as I could.  

“Come out here you b***h!” The guy yelled. And a loud slamming hit the door. I screamed loudly. I looked around my room. My mom wasn’t in it. I hadn’t seen her in the apartment anywhere. And the bathroom was dark when I ran past… she’s not here 

Moms not even here… the pounding on the door continues and I hear a c***k. I look over to the door and see the frame start to splinter. It’s going to give out any second. I go to the side of the room and push the dresser till it’s in front of the door. My stomach is searing with a pain that threatens to blind me. 

I start to see spots. And my knees are giving out. Looking down I see that my white T-shirt is now soaked crimson red. A small pool of the color trails everywhere in the room I stepped. My eyes flutter and I can’t think of what else to do. I know I’m going to pass out. I can feel my head trying to roll back. 

I stumble and fall into my bedroom window. And push it open. There’s no fire escape on this tiny window so it doesn’t offer an escape. But this is New York. The city that never sleeps. So it can offer me help. 

“Help!” I cried out as loudly as I could. “Help!!” I reached down to my pocket pulling my ID out of my wallet, blood smears over the piece of plastic but I don’t care. I stick it out of the window. “Someone please!” I cried again. “Help me!” 

I could slightly hear the men on the other side of the door start to panic. Their voices started to raise and I could hear shuffling. 

A few strangers heard my calls from the alley to my apartment and came running. 

“Are you ok lady?!” A man yelled up. 

I could barely speak anymore, I didn’t have much left in me. 

“Help me.. please..” I said barely a whisper. And I dropped my ID down to the street. 

As I passed out I could barely hear as things unfolded. A woman’s voice..

“Oh my god! Is that blood?! Honey go! Go help her! I’m calling the cops!” 

“Hey you! Stop right there!!” Someone else shouted. Gun shots sounding..

And then blackness consumed me as I slid to the floor.