Lifeline To My Heart

Chapter-18

MAYRA'S POV

Mayra what were you doing with Max, yesterday? His question started spinning inside my mind and my whole body froze in shock and fear.

He knows. He knows.  The topic which I was trying for so long to avoid was already known by him. I should have told him in the first place.

I gulped down the saliva and tilted my head upwards to look into his eyes but he has shut them closed with clenched jaw and hard expressions. I clutched his shirt for support and tried to compose my uneven breath. Everything was going perfect. But why it always happens that whenever I feel like happiness has knocked on my door, suddenly it disappears before even I can open that door?

“Answer." He said again in calm tone but this calmness wasn’t ordinary. It seems like the calmness before that of heavy storm.

I tried to say something, but words doesn't came out.

“ANSWER ME DAMMIT." He yelled and I flinched at his sudden change in voice. I tried to wriggle myself from his hold and occupy a distant with him but his hold on my back was way stronger than my strength to overcome it.

Sweat beads formed over my forehead and I looked into his eyes which are staring me. They only reflects brutality, scariness and anger.

“S-sorry." I shuttered with shaky voice and a low dark chuckle came back in response.

He instantly switched our position by pulling me beneath him. My body get collided with soft bed but still it doesn't relaxed me a bit.

“I am sorry." I apologized with closed eyes and clenched the bed sheet.

“How many time do I have to tell you that don't f*****g say sorry to me?" He asked with a voice full of rage.

“Then forgive me." I whispered still closing my eyes and suddenly a sharp pain crossed my wrist. My eyes instantly snapped in that direction and I found him holding my wrist with his fingers.

I hissed in pain and bite my lips to suppress the moan. Tears welled up into my eyelids and with that I fixed my gaze on him. As soon as our gaze interlocked, his hold on my wrist loosens.

I sighed in relief.

His eye softens and soon landed on my wrist which has faint red marks due to his tight hold. His face changed into regret and without even looking at me he pulled his body away from me and walked over the glass window, looking outside. Deep inside, I was happy that he has not returned back to his old cruel self. He is changing but slowly. My heart swell up with joy and I wiped my tears away. His face had clearly shown regret for his actions.

Does that means he cares for me? I bite my lips at my own question and flushed.

Maybe.

“And that's why I've told you to stay away from me." He muttered in a painful voice whilst scratching the back of his neck.

I closed my eyes and sat on the bed.

How can I stay away from you Rehan when you are becoming my everything?

“At least that Max was better than me. He hasn't hurt you like me." He added coldly.

My heart skips a beat after hearing his words.

From where such thoughts has crossed his mind? He wants me to stay away from him because he thinks that he is hurting me?

I softly walked towards him and stood behind him. His back muscle were tensed and he has his fists clenched together. With a smile I wrapped my arms around his waist from back. His posture regains its composer and now his back was no longer tensed. He unclenched his fists and from peripheral vision I found his fingers trembling. I quickly removed one of my hand from his waist and grabbed his palms. Beautiful silence surrounded us. His intoxicated smell of cologne spreads over my senses and I smiled in content.

“Did you forget your words? You've said that only you've every right on me. So Rehan only you've right to hurt me not Max." I said and my lips escaped a little smile when he cursed under his breath.

I don't know but it sounded cute.

“And no one could ever became better because you are already best for me...” I added softly, flushing over my own statement.

His heartbeat fastens and I can practically hear his uneven breathing.

“It hurts." He whispered and my eyes wide opened at the sound of tiredness in his voice. I slowly unwrapped my arms around him and stood in front of me, directly holding our gaze together.

There was nothing but hurt in his eyes. My heart clenched and I placed my fingers over his cheeks, trying to feel him. He placed his palms over my finger and softly held them in between his fingers over his cheeks. Various spark went through my body, after his touch and I passed him a weak smile to continue whatever he was saying.

“It hurts. It hurts Mayra. I want to forget about everything. It was killing me from inside to think over and over again about something which only gives me pain." He confessed. His voice cracked down little bit.

I understood very well that he was talking about his past. He wants to forget it but Rehan how can I make you believe that past can never be forgotten, that can only be accepted.

I thought of questioning him but I know that he is still not completely ready to open up. I don't want him to force for the same. I know he will one day tell me everything but he does need little time for that. First he needs to develop trust on me after all without trust no one can bound any feelings for the next person.

“You can do anything Mayra. Like you did last night, gave me the best sleep of my life." He said and looked at me with so much affection that I almost forgot that Rehan can also be harsh.

I smiled and slowly removed my fingers from his cheeks and let them down but soon he intertwined our fingers and squeezed it a little.

“Sit." He said.

“Huh?"

He gestured towards bed and I nodded whilst walking up to bed and sat on the corner of the bed.  He pulled out the medical kit from the drawer and grabbed the seat next to me. Curiosity reaches its high level but all I can do is to watch his actions one by one.

He held my wrist and softly ran his thumb over the reddish marks which formed due to his strong hold.

“I am fine Rehan." I said and he shook his head a little in disbelief.

“No, you are not. Stop pretending like it didn't hurt you to be with me." He yelled in frustration, running his another hand through his hairs.

I frowned.

Why he has to always come up with such words? It never hurts to be with him instead I am dying from inside to be with him. 

He gently applied the ointment like it isn't my wrist but any feather. Never knew that he can be this gentle and soft. So finally he is showing his real side.

I smiled a little and placed my palm on his hand. He looked at me with blank face.

“It didn't. Actually it makes me the happiest person whenever I am with you." I added with a bright smile.

He blinked his eyes and then closed them tightly.

“How? Even after all the hurt you've been through that too, only because of me?"  He questioned in a shaky voice.

“That was nothing compared to strange emotions, butterflies in my abdomen, warmth feelings and beautiful sensation you've given to me." As soon as these words slipped out of my mouth, I face palmed myself.

God, now what he will think? How could you be so stupid Mayra to say such things? I gulped down and closed my eyes shut in embarrassment.

“Is it so?" He asked in a husky voice and my knees started forming jellies.

I slowly peeked my eyes open and found him smirking mischievously.

“Answer me do I have that much effect on you?" He added and this time he tilted his face an inch closer to me.

My heart starts racing and I am sure my face would be like tomatoes this time. His breath almost touched the bare skin of my face and I gulped down nervously and tried to avoid his gaze which was continuously fixed on me.

“I need an answer." He said and placed his warm fingers over my neck. I almost drowned in the pool of sparks when he starts creasing my neck with his fingers.

I chewed my inner cheeks to stop my trembling fingers and mentally accepted that not only he has an effect on me but instead he has such a huge effect on me that I couldn't describe it in words.

His smirk gone wider when I clenched the bed sheet tighter.

“I guess I've found my answer." He whispered, trailing his fingers from my neck to my spine.

A shiver ran through my body and I had little goose bumps, where his fingers travelled. Giving me the guilty pleasures.

“You smell so good." He said inhaling deeply near my neck and I shuddered due to his warm breath which were now on my neck and then the next thing which I know I was on his lap, trapped by his strong arms around my waist.

My belly started forming various butterflies and I supported my head to his chest. He placed his chin on my shoulder and I can practically hear our heartbeats which were becoming one. And then it didn't take any further minute to realize that I was actually liking this close proximity with him. I blushed at my own thought.

“Mayra can you do me a favor?" He asked and I instantly nodded.

“Just take me into your arms whenever I am angry. It helps me to melt down. No actually you helps me to melt down." He said with a deep breath and I couldn't help but smiled.

I guess someone said true that at some point everyone needs to feel the comfort of hug.

“Are you still angry with me that yesterday I've met Max?" I asked and his body stiffens after hearing Max name.

What is there between Max and Rehan?

“No." He replied in a straight tone.

“How can I? When your smile, your words and your arms are enough to distract me from every other thing." His words sounded like I was riding on a roller coaster.

And here I know that I couldn't get enough of this person with whom I am falling in love with all over again and again.

“Be ready tonight till eight." He said and I turned my face towards him and arched up my eyebrows in a questioning way.

He smiled a little and here goes my heart swelling up with beautiful feelings.

“We are having a date."