Deathless Snow #Werewolf/BillionnaireLGBT+WritingContest

Only few months since my arrival, a curious reality had already created a crack on my monochromatic horizon. I meet new people speaking bizarre languages, totally different from what I have painstakingly studied. English was only used during formal conversations and forums, though this does not really worry me, on the contrary I prefer it. I have a ready-made reason not to indulge myself in small talks, don’t get me wrong, I don’t dislike small talks just that talking too much wears my energy down and my head was too preoccupied to make any decent conversations. My thoughts were at a loss because of a very peculiar person, a very strange breed of person one would believe to have existed only in films, only in the figment of a ridiculous man’s imagination. For this reason, I am not able to tell you where I am or who I am, so I have to hide my name in an alias, probably one generic name, Snow. The very moment I stepped on this very ground, I already knew I have reached the place where I am meant to be in. Coming here feels like fulfilling a carefully crafted fate. I was found and somebody had been literally seeking for me. Though my being found was only true in a literal sense. I admit his coming into my life was bewildering but I realize that he was only a piece in a large set of puzzle. His appearance was like my mother’s death. I did not feel anything worthy of significance. If there is some emotion I managed to have during her funeral, it wasn’t grief, it was guilt for not being able to feel as what is expected of me. Her first attack took half of my mother’s life. Only half of her body was functioning, the other half was dead. She couldn’t move her right leg and right hand, she lost her voice and most of her memory. The doctor explained she had retained certain memories, those memories that built herself, the memories that made her who she is. It is why it bothers me that when every time I get to visit her, she would be terrified and shaken at the sight of me, so much so that the nurse had to politely ask me to stay outside her ward. The only time I am allowed to enter is when she’s fast asleep. Looking at her from the outside, I thought it wasn’t a good way to die, to lie in bed and watch yourself slowly waste away. What could she be thinking at night knowing she has no more tomorrow to live up to. I have never felt so aware of death, not just her death but death in general. And I believe that this awareness was one of those many reasons that brought me here. My mother never showed any kind of affection for me nor even hate. Everything was all formal between us, just like any traditional principal to an ordinary student. She was only fulfilling her duty as a mother, she will cook me breakfast in the morning then drive me to school, she will attend all my school activities but she will never talk to me unless it was necessary to. She never mistreated me, it’s as if she was being very careful, exaggeratedly so. Many times I have caught her eyes and I would get this funny expression from her, not loathing, it was like aversion with a tinge of pity and regret and sadness and many other awful things. It was just a painful look to behold and I could never ask her why. Before her death, I was already under a critical human predicament, it happened when a very sensible friend of mine questioned my sexuality. He didn’t come to be offensive nor his question was not thrown to satisfy his curiosity. It was a genuine question. It’s why I couldn’t easily laugh it off. I have watched movies and read novels and to be honest, the concept of s****l attraction between two opposite s*x bothers me, no I could go far and say that sexuality bothers me. I know he was a trustworthy friend, the kind to be understanding and conversational. It was tempting to tell him the questions I had formulated for myself but never found any answer. I couldn’t, I just find it hard to explain myself as I am still muddled up on my own. This and my mother’s death created a deep hollow in my heart. Seeing my mother’s look of repulsion and the accumulation of all her life with me created a vortex in my head and all of those other questions and my whole mind had been sucked out into the center of it. This vortex swallowed me whole and took over because I have lost control of everything, I have lost all sense of self. I had been possessed and I allowed myself to watch my body be used for things I wouldn’t normally do. I am fully aware, I am the only one who could take responsibility, but I couldn’t find it in me to be in control. Well, it was all over now, I couldn’t even remember how I managed to get through. But the nightmares never left. They always visit me every night. I did not come here to escape or to begin a new life. Starting over again is a lie. Once you are born into existence you have to accept everything that comes with it and you are left to keep on moving forward or to just simply throw yourself in the limbo. So it isn’t a new life I’m seeking for, I only knew I have to get away from there, there is nothing left for me out there. How I come to be here in an unknown country is something you would suspect to be superstitious. I first discovered this place in a small art museum. It was a piece of art from an anonymous artist. It was a picture of woods enveloped by a thick mist coming out of the river. I was drawn into the dark umbra of shadows created by the woods, it’s as though the woods are hiding something in the dark and I had this sudden desire to discover what it is. As I dig deeper into the painting this desire seemed to squeeze my heart, I know I needed to be there. Nobody could answer where the place was and I discovered it was an art created before the World War era. I have to search it in the internet and after what I thought is an endless search, thankfully, a local from that country recognized the painting. More research made me aware how very expensive this country was. I have to work a year and study their language. After what feels like a short year, I sold everything we have and moved here. After enrolling myself into the university, the first thing I did was find that place in the painting. The locals had been very helpful offering me the perfect directions. Only they have time and time again warned me to take guides with me. I know it was only right to take guides when hiking on an unfamiliar and virgin forests but I sense something odd in their warnings. It was confirmed when every guides refused to go in there with me, they tried to offer me other places to go to. Something was stopping people to go in there and I did not venture into learning the story. I don’t want to know why. It might influence my drive. Going in there was the sole reason why I patiently worked to be here. I could not imagine myself living for anything else aside from going in there. I might sound strange but I feel like I’m already dead and only moving because of this drive to go in there. If I die on the spot, then that’s it, probably that’s how it is going to be, and if I didn’t, if I live, then I can only move on from there. I took out the map and mindfully familiarized myself with the area. There was no visible trail, getting out of there without a guide looks impossible. Phone signals won’t work in the forest, so once I’m there I am going to be cut off from any contacts on the outside world. One of the guides, Hernan, heard my plan and took it in him to accompany me until we reached the foot of the second mountain. From there on, it’s going to be all on me. Before the hike, they made me sign a waiver and made me promise to be responsible of myself. One last time, they attempted to convince me to choose another place to hike and I politely refused. Though decades have passed since the painting, I didn’t see any hint of change around the woods. It was very much the same from the painting. Hernan had been constantly giving me directions all through-out the hike only to decide he will come with me all the way. He could not let me go alone, I had to ask him if I should make him sign a waiver. He didn’t give the joke any regard. During the hike I realized we had been separated, I thought he was only right behind me, following me. I never heard him gone. I only followed the sound of the river until it lead me here, to the very same place I saw in the painting. The chill I got from the picture had been magnified a hundred folds. My heart, though satisfied, was beating so fast and my extremities were shaking, I had to lean on a tree. It’s as though I’m a step closer to the secret. I’m sure the shadowy umbra was hiding a very dark mystery. All my senses are stimulated, it’s not my imagination making it up. I’m not the kind to fall into that trap, this sensation was real for a reason. The strong rustling of leaves drowned the sound of the river. A very strong wind had passed I have to close my eyes. From the recesses of my mind, I saw a vision, a vision coming out of the pitch black shadows. A pair of menacing gold eyes. I opened my eyes and the mist surrounded the area. But I can see it, those golden eyes were real, as real as my mother’s eyes, and they’re angry. It was full of blood lust. I only stood there unmoving, not creating any reason for those eyes to move. But it was unhelpful, I saw it moved, and it is coming for me. This is probably it, I’m ready. It was all like a dream but it I feel that this is a good way to go. It is just like being lost in a different world. At the very least I wouldn’t lie in a bed and contemplate about death for years. The monster growled and leaped fast toward me. Then I heard howls, it stopped the monster. Loud voices of humans were calling for me. It was Hernan and with him is a battalion of forest rangers. “I’m here,” my voice is hoarse. Hernan came to offer his hand and I reach to hold it, my legs were still shaking. “Are you done now?” he asked. “I am, yes… yes…” “Letting you come here was a very bad idea. The management was very mad, they decided to officially ban entry from here. It’s good we managed to find you.” I only nodded. “I can see that you’re not still okay but we need to get going before the dark.” I nodded. Once we set foot on the ranger station, Hernan was so kind to offer me a ride home as I’m still on a state of shock. But I still felt that he expected something far worse than what I’ve been through. I was muddled in confusion. I know I saw it coming, I know something is going to come out of the woods. I asked myself if I had long been expecting to see what I have just witnessed. It was all very familiar, the sensation, the mist, the river and whatever that entity was. Have I seen it in my dreams? In my nightmares? Why does it all feel like a déjà vu? I have already told myself that I can only move on from there. Now that I’m starting to calm down, all reasons are coming back to me. And an idea was conceived in my head, I will find out whatever that thing is. I have to find out. I’m going back there, secretly. “Miss Snow, you alright now?” Hernan cut my train of thought. “Yes, I am okay.” “I think where here,” he smiled. “Yes we are, I have to thank you,” I gave him a small tip and thankfully, he accepted it. “Well thank you, hope not to see you again.” “I promise not to meet you again in the way I did a while back,” I politely replied. “Well, always take care of yourself okay?” he said being very brotherly. “Yes, thank you, you take care of yourself too.” He smiled and started the car. It was all good I thought. At the very least I have learned and familiarized myself with the forest firsthand. I could sneak out from the forest rangers to have my own adventure. I only wish they wouldn’t go far as to block all the entry ways. When I reached the door to my apartment, I felt a sudden rush of shiver. I slowly took the key out and looked around only to find that I’m alone. I opened the room and I already knew it. Someone is here, I brought the spirit of the forest with me. I couldn’t dare to switch the lights on. It was the same ghost I saw in the forest. It has followed me here. I had a strong feeling it was that. And I can sense it was not alone. I am currently and helplessly surrounded. I took in several deep breaths and attempted to compose myself. I told myself it is going to be okay, at least I wouldn’t have to hike three mountains and I wouldn’t have to make elaborate plans to get there. One of them switched the lights on. It illuminated a very beautiful boy with striking gray eyes and lustrous silver hair. The boy whom I guess to be around five years old gave me a very innocent and genuine smile. “hallo!” his tiny voice greeted me. I diverted my eyes to the person that switched my light. She was leaning on the wall, her golden eyes directed on the third man. “Was it you?” I asked her. She didn’t budge, it looks like she’s awaiting for something from the third man sitting on the sofa. “The one I saw on the forest, was it you?” I repeated. “Margaux, Snow is talking to you,” the boy observed. So they knew my name. Some shady people knew my name only on the third day of my arrival. It’s funny to think that they’ve been waiting for me when I was the one who worked her way to get here. It just doesn’t make sense. But how else would they know me and how did they managed to enter here without any sign of force? The lady named Margaux gazed at me. I couldn’t read her eyes though I don’t feel any menace there. “Just tell me who are you people and why are you here?” I ordered. Margaux gave a sigh, “Marco, come with me,” she called out. The boy went to hold her hand and the two of them walked out of the room. I was left with the man sitting aristocratically on the sofa. “Have a seat,” he motioned his hand in invitation. I almost forgot this is my apartment. I occupied the chair right in front of him giving me a view of his pitch black smoky eyes. “You are very brave to climb the forest on your own,” he said almost with a tinge of pride. “Did you know that you broke two customary laws coming here? First, you broke into my house without my permission, second, instead of introducing yourself and stating your purpose you have indulge yourself in my unintentional hospitality.” He smiled, “am I going to jail?” “I could send you to jail,” I said calmly. Thanks to the boy I was able to compose myself and talk to this stranger. Presence of kids is such a very calming thing. “I hate to say this but you also broke the same laws you just claimed I broke. First, you stepped on our territory without our permission, second, you haven’t introduced yourself and only walked away with a bunch of other people. By coming here, we have returned the favor.” “What do you mean by ‘our territory’?” “Before braving into the woods you must have known what I mean by ‘our territory’.” He was the kind who likes to play around. These are the kind of people that easily exhaust me. And I couldn’t drive out the suspicions forming in my head. How much does he know about the monster I have just seen in the woods? Could he be possibly related to it? Could I be talking at this very moment, face to face to a monster? This is driving my head madly. “Okay, what did you came her for? Tell me your story. I will listen.” I finally said. “This might all come as a shock to you so why don’t we take things slowly. And besides, this has been a very long day for you, you might need to get some rest.” “You know you should have considered that before coming here.” I am becoming sarcastic from impatience. He turned silent. I didn’t mind. I waited. He stared intently at the painting of the woods I bought from the museum. “Tell me Snow, what did you feel when you saw me?” he gave out a very strange question. “For what reason do you ask me?” “For the reason that I am fated to marry you.”