Silent Prejudice

7

Dinner passes quickly in the company of longtime friends. Grace’s parents share their excitement for their firstborn, leading to stories from everyone about first venturing from home. The food is delicious, as always. Ordinarily, we would stay until at least ten, but with work the next morning, we head home at a reasonable hour. Everyone else heads inside to start getting ready for bed, but I linger on the back porch and take out my phone. Enjoying my evening didn’t diminish my need to tell him how upset I am over his role in Carter leaving. He explained his perspective about warning Carter away from Gia in his letter, but I need him to know that I still disagree with what he did. Me: We had dinner at the Larson’s tonight. It’s a bit random, but I’m not sure how else to introduce the subject. Zeno: How was it? Me: Good except they’re worried about their jobs. Me: It wasn’t your place to come between Carter and my sister. They aren’t your parents. The conversation dots appear then quickly disappear before my phone buzzes with an incoming call. Zeno’s name flashes on the screen, and I swipe to answer. “Hey,” I say softly. “You didn’t have to call.” “I did. This subject is too complicated for text. I take it your sister is still upset?” His voice is warm molasses heating me from the inside out. It’s my turn to talk, but I wish I could sit back and listen all night to the honeytipped tenor of his words instead. “She is, but there’s so much more to consider. They’re really worried about whether Carter will come back and if they’ll lose their jobs if he sells the place.” A deep swell of breath comes across the line. “Sometimes, there are unfortunate consequences to our actions. I was concerned for a friend and voiced that concern. I don’t regret that decision. There are many things to apologize for, but I still don’t believe that’s one of them. If his affection for her was delicate enough to be doused by our brief conversation, then that is an issue all its own.” “That’s not entirely true. Carter and Gia aren’t like you or me. We’re headstrong and stubborn, and for the most part, confident in our actions. They’re different. Shyness and reserve make it harder for them to form attachments, especially with someone as equally timid. People like them struggle to make lasting relationships. While they’re steadfast and loyal once a connection is forged, those early days are exceedingly fragile.” “Yet you’re convinced that they suit one another?” “I am. They would be considerate and uniquely devoted to each other if given that chance.” “I didn’t think you knew Carter so well to make that kind of call.” “I know enough, and I trust my sister’s judgment. She’s never been so attached to anyone.” “I’ll have to take your word for it. She never seems overly interested in him from my perspective,” he admits warily. “She’s reserved with her emotions. Even I sometimes struggle to interpret how she’s feeling, and I’ve known her since birth.” Zeno huffs. “I suppose I should admire her reserve, but it sure makes reading her difficult.” “You’re one to talk,” I tease softly, then take a deep breath as the direction of our conversation shifts. I hadn’t expected to text him about my exchange with Nevio, but now that he’s on the phone, I feel the words need to be said. “I spoke with Nevio today.” Z is quiet for several long seconds. “And what did you discuss?” “He wanted me to go to a party with him. I’d already decided before your letter that I wasn’t interested, but with my new perspective, I knew that I needed to be up front with him. He’s been very … attentive, and I didn’t want to lead him on.” “I’d like to think he’d respect your decision, but I doubt it.” “It was awful, Z.” My voice grows thin and small as I recall the hurtful words Nevio spat at me. The line is dead silent before Zeno’s ragged growl touches my ear. “Did he f*****g touch you?” I shake my head, though he can’t see me. “No, but the things he said— they were terrible. It was like he became a complete stranger all of a sudden, spewing such hateful things. I knew he used his charm on people, but I had no idea … I had no clue that the person underneath had become so ugly.” “He’s not who you think he is, Luisa.” “I can see that now.” I stand and begin to pace on the back porch as awkwardness sets in. “Anyway, I just wanted you to know, and … I want to say that … I’m sorry. I should have apologized already, but it’s been a lot to take in. I said some really awful things to you when I didn’t know the whole picture. I assumed the worst of you, and though the truth hasn’t erased all my anger and hurt, it helps to understand.” “You couldn’t have known why I behaved the way I did,” he says fervently. “The whole thing has been a s**t situation for too long. You have every right to be upset.” I don’t know what to say. Zeno is being considerate and civil, and even though I want to gobble up his attention, a part of me is still waiting for the other shoe to drop. For him to snap out of his temporary insanity and remember that he wants nothing to do with me. Will I ever be able to trust him again like I did when we were young? Only time will tell. That type of faith and connection would have to be reforged, and a new bond created. “I know you don’t want the affair to get out,” I say, broaching a sensitive subject. “But do you think it would help Nevio to know? To understand?” “Knowing about that would only make things worse.” I can’t imagine how that could be right, but he knows Nevio’s issues and past better than I do. My pious assumptions have already gotten me into trouble once, so I’m not about to make that same mistake again so soon. “That’s too bad, but I guess at this point, there are no easy fixes.” “Unfortunately, no.”