Chapter Eight
706 Words
"Are you sure you don't want to go home and rest?" Xander asked, concerned.
"I'm fine." I reply for the hundredth time today. He's been asking if I'm okay, if I want to go home, if I want to spend the day elsewhere, if I'm fine. But he has totally avoided Noah, because he knows that's my trigger and I'd lose it if I have to hear his name again.
"We only have two classes together. Will you be fine?"
"Is the dinner offer still out or I ruined it?" I ask, in an attempt to change the subject.
"Nope. It isn't." He joked and I pout. Mom always grants me what I want when I offer her a pout. She told me it's impossible to refuse that pout and I'm hoping this guy also can't resist my pout. I notice he stopped talking and walking all together.
"Jane. If you pout one more time, I'm going to kiss you. So, run off to class before I ruin your day more than it already is. I'll pick you up by 7pm"
I stop pouting and blink. He smirks and walks off. "Hey. Xander!" He turns back to see me pouting again, then he shakes his head and continues walking. I see Kylie catch up with him at the end of the hallway and link her arm around his. Surprisingly, I don't feel jealous or feel the need to pull her hair off her scalp. Am I really attracted to Xander?
I sneak my lunch into the sandwich and eat my sandwich there while reading a novel. Noah is probably in the cafeteria right now, eating macaroni and salad with Kylie hanging on to everyone of his words while Xander watches jealously. The anger I feel at the thought of Kylie near Noah makes me want to cry and laugh at the same time. I'm pitiful. I'm pathetic.
Noah broke me. He shattered me emotionally. He ruined whatever was left of my self esteem and he said he was going to come back for me. What kind of ill luck is this that I have? Why am I the one who wants us to move again now? Was this what it was like for mom? Was our incessant moving because of a man?
I finish my sandwich in the almost empty library and leave. The cafeteria was still full, meaning lunch was still on. I head straight to class and seated right in my seat was Noah. How awesome!
Instead of me to lose composure and cry, I get angry. I want him out of here, out of my life.
"What do you want?" I'm surprised at how firm my voice comes out. He was wearing a black hood on blue denim with biker boots. He looked... Hell! I don't care if he looks like a demigod. I don't care if his face was top notch perfection. I don't care if he was biting his lower full lip nervously. I don't even care if he was covering up a lean and strong torso with that hood. What I care about is him leaving me the hell alone.
"I want to talk"
I surprise myself again by laughing. I sit on the table about two tables from the entrance and keep laughing. His expression didn't waver. He still looked determined to talk. "It's been hard on me too"
"Hell no! Noah, it hasn't. You've made friends. You've never known what it was like to be disgraced and embarrassed. You don't know what betrayal tastes like."
"I know Jane. I know the things you don't know. I know how it feels to be subdued and helpless. I know what it's like to be unable to control anything. Hell, I also know how it feels to not get a chance to explain anything to anyone. I know how it feels to miss classes and go for therapy so I wouldn't go nuts from depression"
I was speechless and probably expressionless too. Nothing made sense anymore. I had no comeback to that. He was fuming. I was confused. People started to troop into the class and he just disappeared with the crowd. Then a big fat tear rolled down my cheek.
- Writer
