Rivers

Today

I stopped loving you today. 

I looked at your sleeping figure, across the room.

Your eyes closed, body relaxed.

I wanted to hold you,

To run my fingers through your soft hair. 

And I wished, with all my might, that you were

Dreaming of me.

And I knew I wasn’t over you,

The poems I wrote of you,

The tears I cried for you.

I couldn’t mend my heart,

Because you still had it.

So, today, I took it back. 

I waited for your eyes to open. 

As if you would feel me pull away from you.

So I could look at your eyes with nothing

But longing, one last time.

But your eyes didn’t open,

And I realized how silly it was-

Me staring at you across the room, with so much

Space and time between us.

I thought of you, of us.

I realized I no longer knew the shade of blue your eyes are. 

I said your name, no burning in my throat.

I turned around,

And refused to look back.