Love Me From Yesterday

It was such a sublime experience for me the first time we met. You, wearing that plain, knitted brown one-piece dress, such simplicity took my attention away from my phone. Although we're strangers, I felt that connection after we opened up to each other. For the second time, the moment you entered the cafe, I was taken aback by how daring you were. Tinignan mo ako sa mata, scanned my entire being as if I had done something bad. I feel violated by that, kung alam mo lang. But since it was our first meeting, I just coughed it out of embarrassment. Hindi mo alam how embarrassed I am. I felt like jumping out of my seat and ran away from you. But you know what? I endured it kase you were the girl my parents wanted me to spend the rest of my life with. During our fancy dinner, hindi mo alam kung paano mo ako pinakaba. You didn't touch your food and I thought it was a poor judgment of mine. In fact, busog ka lang pala. Our first impression of each other wasn't that good, and it wasn't that bad either. Despite all that, I still gave you a chance and I am so grateful I did that. By that time, hindi ko pa siya narerealize. I never thought that you were the fate that I am desperately looking for. It was still vivid in my mind how bold you were at that time. The way you stared into my eyes and mumbled those words without a bit of hesitation. It was mind-blowing. Never in my whole life ako nakarinig ng napaka-absurd na statement like yung sinabi mo sa akin ng harapan that time. Such a cliche thing for me to say this but, you were the first person who could've done such a thing to me and I admit, that was the start of how I slowly obsessed over you. An obsession to a point where I couldn't imagine living without you. An obsession where I want you to stay by my side for the whole day. An obsession that I later tried to regret but I never dared to. All the experiences we shared, the laughter, the sadness, the pain; I deeply buried them inside my heart. I completely made them my own as I can't dare to see that only you are hurting. Sa tuwing nasasaktan ka, nasasaktan din ako. Sa tuwing tinitignan mo ako na para bang ayaw mo na, na para bang pagod ka na, I don't know how to act in front of you, knowing that no matter what I do, you were not okay, and I can't make you feel okay. I feel so crushed every time I see you in that state every single time. Our story started with you, sitting in front of me having that confident smile as you made that bold request. But now, here I am, sitting in front of you, watching you smile in a portrait I took when you were the happiest. But unlike before, at least, call my name, please ...