Song of Torment

Chapter Fifteen

Still

“Teach me.”

“What?” she asked.

“I want you to teach me everything. I want to know how to fight and how to defeat them,” I said to her. She looked at her husband before looking at me again.

“You want revenge,” she said.

“I want to torment them,” I told her. I clench my fist and bite my lip as I recall the things I’ve been through before this woman, Crystallyn Jane Del Valle-Guevarra found me.

-

“More! Is that all you’ve got?!” Master shouted at me so I punch and kick harder until I collapse on the floor.

“Get up!” she told me.

I move and tried my best to get up. I felt my tears falling so I wipe them away immediately and started kicking and punching again the punching bag.

The days of my training became harder and harder but I become better. There were times that I would collapse and remained unconscious for days. Sometimes my master would even beg me to rest but I was stubborn enough and continue my training on my own.

I was like that for 5 years. It took me 5 years to become one of the best fighter among Crystallyn’s student. And it took me 6 years to be able to fight Nicol Aris Guevarra into a hand to hand combat.

It was hard. There were also a lot of times that I wanted to give up but I didn’t because the memory of losing my unborn child is more painful than having broken bones and injuries while fighting. Going back at that moment when I open my eyes and found out that I lost my baby, it became my strength to become strong.

-

“Careful,” Rhyme said as he accompany her brother towards his room.

It’s already been a week and Matthew just got discharge from the hospital. My master is mad. Rhyme is I don’t know. After what happened in the hospital that day, she never asked me questions. She never talked to me again. She’s just always beside her brother so I never also got the chance to talk to Matthew again after he said those three words.

Right now, we’re at the Guevarra’s family mansion. Even if Matthew is against it, he had no choice but to stay here until his wounds were fully recovered.

I watch them as Rhyme open the front door while still helping Matthew. I just watch them when they finally entered the mansion. Matthew look at me and I just smiled at him. He was about to say something to me but Rhyme cut him off.

“They already prepared your room,” Rhyme told me. I’m still contemplating whether I should go in or not but I chose to go and follow them.

Still hesitating, I helped Rhyme to open Matthew’s room and lay him on his bed.

“I’ll just go and tell Nana to prepare some foods,” Rhyme said. “Tell him about you and Mom or I will,” she whispered to me.

I sigh when it was only me and Matthew. I fix his bed then look around his room. This is actually my first time here since I never got the chance to come here when we were still together.

I walk towards the piano where some picture frames are displayed on top of it. I smiled when I saw him with Rhyme. Maybe he is just about 13 years old here. He is not smiling at the photo and Rhyme is frowning. I also saw their family picture.

I sigh when I remember what Rhyme said. Matthew will surely ask too many questions after I tell him the relationship between me and his mother.

I walk back to his bed where he is already sitting and just looking at me.

“Is everything okay?” he asked and I just nod at him and smiled.

“I have something to tell you,” I started and he just look at me, waiting for what I’m about to say. “I’m...your Mo-”

I was cut off by the knock on his door and there Crystallyn entered the room. She’s smiling at first but her smile vanish when she saw me.

“Mom.”

“Rhyme told me you’re already here,” she said then look at me. “What are you doing here?” she asked.

I gulp and look at Matthew who is giving us a questioning look.

“I clearly told you I don’t want you in his life again,” she said that made my eyes water in tears.

“What’s going on? Mom?” Matthew asked.

“I’m sorry,” I told Master. “I’m sorry if he got hurt again.”

“Just leave,” she told me. I look down and even though I badly want to look at Matthew, I didn’t dare to. I turned around and left the room.

“No!” I heard him shouted.

I walked fast to get out of there. When I got in the car, I drove faster to get to Matthew’s penthouse.

I headed straight to my room when I got there. I bring out my suitcases and just put all my stuff there. I didn’t even bother fixing it. I just put everything until I can’t zip the suitcase.

I cried and use much force to zip it until the zipper got broken. I cried when I saw my forefinger bleeding. I even cried harder when I suddenly felt the sting of this wound. But what hurts the most is that, I really can’t enter Matthew’s life again.

I tried even though it’s hard. I thought I was almost there but these things happened. Now even my master hates me and I don’t know what to do anymore.

I didn’t even realize that I fell asleep crying. I woke up with another nightmare. It was already dark and I’m so hungry. That’s when I remembered that I haven’t ate my lunch yet so I stood up and headed to the kitchen.

I was startled when I saw Matthew sitting on the dining table when I got to the kitchen.

“You’re here,” I said but he didn’t say a word and he is just looking at me. I walk towards him and sat in front of him. “I thought you will be staying at home for a while until your wounds are all heal.”

“This is my home,” he said. I wanted to smile but I chose not to as I sense the coldness in his voice.

“Did you cook this?” I ask as I started eating.

“You lied to me,” he said that made me stop. “Again.”

“Matthew.”

“First, you broke our promise that there will be no secrets between us. Then, you didn’t tell to me about the real reason why you left me. You made me believe that you runaway with that bastard Aldrin. Then you lied about the real reason why we lost our baby.”

He sighs then look away from me.

“Now, my Mom...”

I close my eyes and bite my lip. So he found out already.

“I asked you on where did you learn the famous deadly move that my mother created and you chose to lie! How many times will you lie to me?!” he asks almost shouting.

“I’m sorry. I was about to tell you,” I said as my tears started to fall down.

“I spent years trying to find you but all along, you are just close to me.”

He stood up and went to the counter. His back is on me.

“Does she knew who you really are?” he asked. “Who you are in my life?”

“I don’t know,” I said truthfully.

When Master saved me, she never asked me questions about who I am. The only thing she asked me is my name and what happened to me that day. She talked about Matthew everyday that’s why I knew what he has been doing all this years. Matthew never got the chance to introduce me to her before so I really don’t know if she has any idea who I really am.

“Whatever,” he said then walked out of the kitchen.

*

“She saved me.”

I was in the living room, watching some random things on tv when Cassie sat next to me. I didn’t ask some further questions to her about her relationship with my mother. I want her to come to me and just tell me the truth. I am so tired with her white lies and not answering my questions so I chose to wait for her.

“After I lost our baby, Rum just left me in that abandon building. I was so weak because I lose too much blood. I manage to get out of the building but eventually collapse. When I woke up, I’m already at the hospital and you we’re there.”

My jaw clench when I remember how she shouted at me. Now I understand why she was so mad at me at that time.

“A day after you visited me, she came. She introduce herself and told me how she found me. She also gave me a place to stay when I got discharged from the hospital.”

“Then she became your Master,” I said.

“I wanted those bastards to pay for what they did to my baby so I came to her and asked her to teach me. To train me and make me stronger.”

“That’s why they’re always away, saying it’s about business. But the truth is, they are coming back and fort to LA just to train you.”

“Yes.”

We were silent for a moment. The sound from the TV is the only thing you can hear.

“What else are you not telling me?” I asked her but she just look away and bite her lip. A sign that she’s not telling me anything.

“Until when should I wait for the answers?” I asked her impatiently. She covers her face and sigh a few times before looking at me again with tears in her eyes.

“Until you love me again,” she said as she cried, covering her face again to hide from me.

I felt my eyes sting so I had to take a deep breath to stop myself from tearing.

“Did I ever stop?”

Slowly, she removes her hand from her face and looked at me with her swollen eyes.

“You really think I stopped?” I asked her. “I maybe angry to you for leaving me. I may got hurt thinking you runaway with another guy but I never stopped.”

She sob but tried to control it.

“But I heard you. When Ethan asked you if you still love me, you said you don’t know.”

I blink away the tears and move to her closer. I hug her and let her cry on my chest.

“They you should have heard me saying how I’m still deeply, madly and crazy in love with you.”

She cried harder after hearing that.

—