The Summer Bucket List

Chapter 10

“Are you ready?” August asked. “So ready.” I giggled.

We were on a list 10,4 and 18 mission — afternoon bicycle ride, and a picnic and a sushi mukbang. August didn’t spare any second in riding the bicycle as if he was in a race.

“Hold up!” I shouted. “Come on, you’re better than that,” he said as he made a triumphant laugh. Well, I was before. I drove my bike faster, and yet he was still two meters ahead of me.

“This isn’t a race, dumbass!” I surrendered, sweat dripping all over me. He just laughed as he paused and waited for me. “You know, just say you give up,” he teased me with his laugh.

I paused as well on his spot, catching my breath like a weak duckling in front of him. But then… “Who said I give up?” I said, then gave him a sarcastic smile. The smile of someone who got her target ate her bait. I started spinning my wheel and drove so fast. It was a double win. I cheated and got my revenge for what he often did sixteen years ago. I laughed as I drove far away from him.

“You, cheater,” he shouted. “This is so much fun!” I shouted as well, poking fun at him.

We both laughed so hard. We were just like this when we were kids, teasing each other until one of us gets annoyed while the other one laughs. When it happened, it feels like a true triumph. It wasn’t toxic, it wasn’t selfish either. It’s simply just us, messy and twisted in our own way.

We came along a tree-lined path where leaves smoothly drifting through the fresh wind. Sunlight sieved on the gaps between the trees. The simple pleasure of a leisurely stroll made my soul at ease. “It’s so beautiful,” I muttered. I caught him off guard, never taking his eyes off me. But that moment gave me a chance to stare at his glowing ocean blue eyes. It looks so light and tranquil, and his smile, so warm and soft, it took half my soul with it. I don’t want to look at anything else. I just wanted to look at him, because when I did, I felt life. Filled with so many thoughts, I never see myself smiling back at him.

…

We found the best spot for our picnic. A place surrounded with green grass under a tree. The scenery felt like it had emerged out of the canvas, and we were there as the subject. I sat beside him, my toes touching the cool grass while I ate a piece of sushi with my bare hands. “Did you make these?” I asked him. He nods. “It’s good.” I uttered with food inside my mouth. He was just watching me laughing under his breath. “You didn’t change.” He muttered.

” What? ” I asked muddled.

“Remember when you choked because you kept talking even though your mouth was full?”

“Yeah, I almost died. Thanks to you, I’m still alive,” I said playfully; He just laughed.

“But what I do remember is your face when you’re choking. You looked so funny.”

“Even on the edge of my death, you made fun of me. Evil jerk,” I said, laughing in between my words.

“Why? It’s true though.” He laughed louder. His laugh grabbed my attention, that it was only him I could notice. “I miss your sunglasses on,” I whispered. He gazed at me hard and his voice dropped. “I miss you more.” I froze when I heard him. My cheeks burnt and my heart pounded against my chest, hard and prevailingly draining the air out of my lungs. I gasped out of air.

“So, did you become the chef like you always wanted to be?” I asked, changing the loop of that suffocating moment.

“Yeah. The head chef in our restaurant in town. You should sometimes visit, my treat,” he said.

“Caden told me.” I nodded as I smiled. “Can you hand me the water?” He grabbed the bottle of water and handed it to me. “Thank You.”

“Well, how about you? Did you end up being a Barbie like your dream when you were six?” he said, provoking me in a funny way.

I laughed. It almost made me choke in the midst of drinking the water.

“No. A nurse,” I answered. His eyes widened, quite stunned. “But you hate blood?”

“I am,” I shortly replied. “Then why still pursue it?” I looked at him with a steady gaze. I dropped my head. “Sometimes what scares you the most, teaches you how to survive in life.” He was left speechless.

I agonize a little thinking about that reality. I didn’t intend to dredge that up, but it’s the most convincing reason to use it. He lapses into silence, and I didn’t intend it to happen.

…

I got into my bed after he accompanied me home. That afternoon picnic was perfect until after I brought it up. Although August still made sure we'd end in laughter, I still couldn’t get my mind off the fact that I’m rigid and incapable of making things smooth and out of drama.

My phone rang, and when I slid the screen, it was August.

“Farah?”

“Hi, August.”

“Are you going to sleep now?”

“Yeah. Why?”

“Nothing, I just wanna check on you.”

“I’m good. I enjoyed this afternoon.

“I did too.”

“You still free tomorrow? Maybe we could continue the Summer Bucket List?”

“Of course. I’m always free, you’re the one who has work.”

“I took a week off, actually.”

“Okay, then I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“I’ll see yah. Goodnight, Farah.”

“Goodnight.”

Then, our call ended.

I never thought that this call would make me realize something. An unflappable, stable twenty-four-year-old woman could feel like a teenager after that call. It was the first time I felt enlivened by just a single call. It was never like that with Easton. Even though there wasn’t anything flirty on that call, I felt a little hysterical. "What’s happening to me?"