TILL MY LAST BREATH

CHAPTER 4: A GLIMPSE AT YOU

RAIN

Maybe I was so unwanted that even death refused to take me. How pathetic.

It’s been three weeks since that night. The night that broke me in more ways than I could count. The bruises have healed, but the marks remained, carved permanently on my skin. I’ve stayed home since that time, trapped in the house that feels less like a home and more like a cage.

No one noticed my absence from school. Not the teachers, not the classmates who barely remembered my name. No one except Sarah. She tried, I’ll give her that. Lots of missed calls, hundreds of messages, all expressing her worry for me. But she’s not allowed to see me anymore.

Apparently, my aunt told her mother that I was a “bad influence.” A degenerate who would ruin her precious daughter’s future. What a hypocrite she is. She plays the role of the perfect guardian so well that sometimes I wonder if even she believes her own lies.

I stared at the ceiling from my thin mattress, listening to the faint ticking of the old clock on the wall. “Mum,” I whispered softly, “why did you leave me here all alone? Was I really that bad? Did I do something wrong?” My voice cracked at the end. Tears gathered in my eyes, but I blinked them away. Crying never helped. It only made them angrier.

“Get out here, brat! Breakfast won’t make itself!” My aunt’s voice cut through my thoughts like a blade.

I sighed quietly. Reality had called, and I had no choice but to answer. I got up, tried my possible best to calm the ache in my chest, and dragged myself to the kitchen.

Cooking for them was a part of me now. I’d been doing it since I moved in with them, and in time, I’d gotten good at it. If nothing else, at least I could say I was good at something. Within thirty minutes, breakfast was ready, golden pancakes, crispy bacon, fresh juice. I served them neatly, hoping and praying not to get in their bad books this time like I always do every time I'm to serve them breakfast .

“What took you so long?” my aunt snapped.

Before I could answer, Brittany rolled her eyes dramatically. “And what is this supposed to be? It tastes worse than your last disaster.”

My hands trembled slightly as I twisted my apron. “I-I’m sorry, but it tasted fine before I brought it in.”

“OMG you tasted my food?” My aunt’s voice dropped, cold and dangerous.

I froze. “I didn’t mean-”

Her hand connected with my cheek before I could finish. The sharp sting made my eyes water instantly. I stood there, clutching my face, tring to keep my breathing in check.

“Answer me, you ungrateful child!”

“I… I…” The words refused to come. it was like I had suddenly become mute.

Brittany sighed loudly. “Mum, just leave her. She’s not worth your time. We have better things to do than waste energy on her. Weren’t we going shopping?”

For a moment, I caught something in her eyes. Was that pity I saw? No no, I quickly pushed that thought away. Brittany didn’t do pity.

“Fine,” my aunt muttered. “I need to clear my head anyway.” She grabbed her purse and stormed out, with Brittany trailing behind her.

I let out a shaky breath. “What a day,” I murmured. My cheek still burned where her hand had met my cheek.

But then, as if summoned by some cruel twist of fate, a familiar name slipped into my thoughts. Dale.

I shook my head quickly. No. I couldn’t think about him. Not again.

Yet, no matter how many times I tried to push him away, his face kept reappearing, those cold eyes, that crooked smile, the warmth I thought I saw once before he turned it all against me.

Maybe if I saw him one last time, I could finally let go. Just one glimpse.

Before I could stop myself, I found my feet moving on their own. I grabbed my small purse, whispered a silent prayer that I wouldn’t get caught, and stepped outside.

The air smelled faintly of wet grass from the morning dew, and the sound of cars rushing by filled the streets. I hailed a taxi and gave the driver an address I knew by heart even though I never meant to memorize it.

Two blocks away from Dale’s house, I asked the driver to stop. I didn’t want him to see me, not really. I just wanted… closure. Whatever that meant.

I walked carefully, keeping my head low, and stopped near a tall oak tree across the street. My heart pounded in my chest like a drum. The iron gates of his house gleamed under the sunlight, and I wondered how something could look so perfect while my own world was falling apart.

Then a car pulled up in front of his gate.

When the door opened, my breath caught.

Brittany.

For a moment, confusion clouded my mind. Hadn’t she gone shopping with my aunt? What was she doing here?

Before I could process it, the gates swung open and there he was. Dale. My Dale. No stop it Rain you keep calling him yours cause he's not. I pushed that out as soon as it came

Even from this distance, he looked… breathtaking. Careless. Confident. The kind of boy who didn’t have to try to make your heart skip a beat. I hated that my body still reacted to him. I hated that part of me still wanted him to look at me.

But he didn’t look at me. He looked at her. I couldn't deny I was jealous.

Brittany walked up to him with a smile, her voice low and sweet. He said something that made her laugh. The same kind she used to mock me with. And then, before my brain could catch up with what my eyes were seeing, he wrapped an arm around her waist and kissed her.

Time stopped.

The world fell silent, the air froze, and everything inside me shattered.

I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t move. I just stood there, watching the one person I had fallen for so recklessly hold someone else. The very person who had helped ruin my life.

His hands moved to her waist as if they belonged there. She kissed him back with the same hunger I once mistook for affection.

Pain ripped through me, deep and raw. It felt like my chest was being torn apart from the inside. I pressed my hand over my heart as a suddenly pain shot through my chest. Tears blurred my vision, but I couldn’t look away.

When I finally managed to turn, my legs moved on their own. I walked away quickly until I was practically running.

I didn’t remember getting into the taxi or giving the driver the address. I just remember letting out uncontrollable sobs that wouldn’t stop no matter how hard I tried to swallow them down.

By the time I reached home, my eyes were swollen from the excessive crying I had done in the cab.

I stumbled to my room and collapsed on the floor, my body shaking with silent tears. I buried my face in my hands and let the memories crash over me.

I thought I had nothing left to lose, but I was wrong. Seeing him with her hurt more than any slap or insult ever could. It was the final piece of my heart breaking apart.

“If only I were good enough,” I whispered. “If only…”

My voice faded into the emptiness of the room.

I sat there for a long time, staring at nothing, until a strange calm settled over me. Maybe this was what acceptance felt like.

Maybe it was time to stop chasing what hurt me.

But even as I told myself that, I knew one truth I couldn’t run from, no matter how hard I tried to forget him, a part of me would always carry the memory of Dale.

The boy who had become part of my very existence that no matter how hard I tried I just couldn't let go.