Moon Crystals

Chapter 4

There was a voice, deep in the background as if it were hidden in the shadows and covered in my nightmares. She was soft, sweet, calm. That voice seemed to call to me. Whispering my name so sweetly it made me wonder if they had ever done it again.

“You're always like that” Lenna's voice made me want to cringe.

Sorry, I wanted to ask, but my voice just didn't come out.

Why did it always have to be so scary? I just… don't want to be alone.

Please do not leave me alone.

“You're really ridiculous, do you really think anyone will like that kind of attitude? Look at you, not even Mommy loved you” Jace's voice sounded spiteful, but my chest just ached.

No, please… brother… don't leave me.

“We are tired of you, Alena. I'm tired of hearing again and again that you're causing trouble,” Dad complained.

Sorry…I'm sorry. I'm sorry… even though I can't cry, I'm sorry.

"You killed Mom"

"You are a natural disaster"

Lenna's continued laughter resounded.

“We will always be friends” she had said.

Please don't leave me either...

I beg you, I swear I beg you, I swear I do whatever you ask. I'll go to meetings, smile at everyone, hug everyone, be anything you want, but don't leave me. Do not leave me…

It's dark. It's dark. It's dark. Don't leave me alone in the dark...

It is scary. It's cold, I'm tired of being alone.

“You're not,” the voice whispered, sweet and calm and gentle. I could feel his fingertips brush against my frozen skin. It was hot… it was warm.

"I'm alone," I muttered cringing, but through the darkness, I could see her smile.

“Not anymore, Alena” he called me.

“It hurts…everyone is leaving me and it hurts…it hurts so bad” I whimpered as my chest ached, my sobbing voice seemed to fail with every attempt at a new word.

"Are you afraid?" He asked.

I am. I am scared. I don't want to be alone, don't leave me alone.

“You don't need to be afraid, sweetie” his hands wrapped around my body, pulling me towards him “you won't be alone, you never have been”.

His breath on the back of my neck made me shiver.

"Don't leave me..." I muttered hugging myself that touch, that being, that voice. "Do not leave me"

He smiled, I could feel his smile in the warmth of his arms.

“I will not, I will never leave you” he replied “but I need you to open your eyes… I need you to wake up”.

“I'm scared” I repeated, huddling in his arms.

"I know" he replied gently, stroking my hair "but I'm here".

It's gonna be okay.

…

My body slowly became slow and distant. Everything was dark, removed, everything was abandoned. It was red, black and gray.

Poor Alena, I thought. A lonely child, such a lonely mind.

“Don't leave me” she cried, her voice reminded her of a desperate child.

“Don't leave me alone, I'm scared…” she repeated while sobbing.

“Please, please…don't leave me, don't leave me”

I sighed, it was noisy, so noisy…

“Please don't go, I'll do whatever you want…just don't go. Don't leave me alone again…”

My steps seemed taller as I walked through the black and gold hall. There was no sky there, just the vastness of nothingness above my head. The air grew heavy, the shadows hugging each other in an oval shape. She was the core of darkness, I knew.

Her voice came from there, her feelings, her agony. I felt, heard.

"I won't leave you, Alena," I muttered as I tried to get closer, but I heard her scream.

"No, please…brother…don't leave me."

Her mind was about to break. It was about to fall apart.

How much alone did she feel? How much has she been abandoned? He could see the answer in the scars on her mind, in the roots of the loneliness that seemed to sink into her soul. She was alone, she was always alone.

I know, I wanted to answer. I know what loneliness is like.

"It's dark. It's dark. It's dark. Don't leave me alone in the dark… ”Her soul was crying, cowering inside the pool of shadows and pain.

"It is scary. It's cold, I'm tired of being alone"

My feet moved on their own, and even as the chill gripped my spine, I felt my fingers touch her skin.

"You're not," I muttered trying to reach her.

"I'm alone" she cried, cringing at my touch.

"Not anymore, Alena," I replied as I forced my body into the shadows, taking them for me.

“Come back, Dark,” Rasta's voice was dominant, yelling at me.

“It hurts…everyone is leaving me and it hurts…it hurts so much” she said and in my chest, in the place where I thought I was unable to feel for so many millennia, I saw something come up. An emptiness I could recognize.

"Are you afraid?" I questioned.

"I am. I am scared. I don't want to be alone, don't leave me alone"

“you won't be alone, you never have been” I muttered “I've always been here” I tried to say but it didn't reach her.

“Don't leave me…” she begged wrapping herself in my arms and so I took her to me.

"Come back! Dark! Come back!" Rasta screamed in my mind.

“I won't, I will never leave you” I replied “but I need you to open your eyes… I need you to wake up”