Restart

Chapter Thirty-Five

SIENNA'S POV

"Wake up honey" I hear my mum says as she pats my arm gently to wake me up. I open my eyes and look around taking a second to gather my surroundings which is the sofa at home. Then I remembered my dad had stayed awake until I got home. Me and Ethan decided to have a night cap with my dad as we told him about the amazing date we had.. then they got chatting about the working world. I'd grabbed a blanket as I was cold and the last thing I remember I was leaned my head on his shoulder whilst they continued talking. I must have fallen asleep from boredom I think to myself as I say "Wheres dad and Ethan?"

"Well your dad is currently taking our suitcases outside to what for our cab to the airport. It's already ten am. Ethan went home god knows what time, I know your dad came to bed around four this morning though. We decided to let you sleep as your barely sleeping these days. Anyway I just wanted to let you know we are about to leave and tell you to enjoy your weekend as. I'm only a phone call away if you need me though" my mum says.

"Mum, go have fun. I will be fine. Plus I've god Sid with me anyway. Did dad still go to the grave to leave flowers?" I ask yawning remembering my dad said we could go together this morning.

"Yes, he feels guilty about that but he insisted you get some sleep. He said he will make sure to go with you when we all come back though" My mum says

"It's fine. I can still go myself as well. I just thought it would be nice to go together since we both planned to go anyway" I say rubbing my eyes as I sit to wake up a little

"Okay, well I need to go as I'm sure the taxi will be here any minute. I made you a brew its on kitchen side with a croissant. When I get back I want to hear all about this date though. It sounds like it was lovely" My mum says standing up.

"Okay, thanks mum. we can have some mum and daughter time next week to catch up. In the meantime go before dad leaves you here" I say as my mum blows me a kiss as she walks towards the living room door. I blow her a kiss back as I then wave saying "Make sure you both have fun. love you both". "We love you as well, you also have fun" My mum says then she disappeared from my view heading out.

After a few more minutes trying to wake up I check my phone to see if anyone has messaged.. except thats died over night.

I might as well put it on charge whilst I get ready for the day I think to myself getting up to head upstairs.

Once I reach my bedroom I put my phone on charge before going to pick out clothes for today and over the weekend. Alexia play cannonball by little mix I say and the song starts and I start singing it imagining my angel babys can hear me and know im singing it to them whilst picking the clothes out. Deciding on black thermal leggings and a pale yellow knee length woolen lose jumper with a simple strappy top underneath for today's choice to wear with my long boots I take my clothes with me for my shower. Leaving all doors open whilst saying Alexia turn right the way up as wildest dreams by Taylor swift starts to play next. The music turns up and I feel I'm all set to get in the shower and wake up fully.

Throughout my whole shower I think over the date I had with Ethan last night and I simply keep going back to the kisses that literally blew my brain away. I'd never been kisses like that before. Someone should of told me I shouldn't of settled for anyone that can't kiss me making me feel like my whole body was alive. Where your skin just tingles and your mind forgets even who you are. If someone had told me I certainly wouldn't of settled on Clive I think to myself whilst I can also feel my frowning as the water washes all over my body.

If only the water could wash away all memory's of that vile human. Then maybe I could be more at peace in life. I really need to decide if I want to write this victim testimony though otherwise I'm just going to keep going b round in circles and stressing over it each day secretly whilst putting on a show for everyone to say I'm fine. Everyday I'm debating weather to or not. Part of me just wants to not waste my breath so he can't know how much he destroyed me. Yet part of me wants to scream it all out so the world can see just what vile really looks like. So I can just have my story told once and for all. But then I really don't think he deserves the satisfaction of knowing how he mentally has scarred my brain, heart and soul. Once again I find myself digested at myself for letting him irrate me again as I scrub my body extra hard wanting to erase all memory of him from my mind. Its only when I catch the sensitive scar on my stomach causing pain that I come back to my senses rinsing the soap of my body and then get out the shower.

After getting ready for the day I lean my hands on the sink as I look in the mirror at myself. Yes I still look awful which matches how I feel I think to myself.

"Okay Sienna, it's okay to have bad days. You knew you would have them and ot doesn't matter that you had an amazing night last night. Hell your have an amazing weekend with everyone. But its still okay to feel sad during it all. Now time to put this smile on my face and continue faking it until I win it" I say out loud trying to give myself a pet talk.

"What do you want to win?" I hear Sid say and scream as whip around to see Sid stood in the door way looking at me. I flare at him as my hand goes to my heart and I think to myself my poor ticker. "Dont creep up on people" I shout more out of fright still than actually wanting to shout.

"I'm sorry, I did shout up the stairs but then again that music is so load you wouldn't of heard if anyone broke in" Sid says

"That would be my luck as well. Who knows they may do a better job than Clive did. What are you doing here anyway?" I say walking towards the door.

"Dad rang me and said he felt awful that you would be going to the grave alone. He said you was awake. I said I come keep you company, I also tried to ring you to see what time you was going.. but when you didn't answer I figured I'd just come over and ask in person. Seems like it was a good choice" Sid says as we walk down tbe corridor to my room. I shout "Alexia turn off" and the music stops then I continue saying "I was getting ready and my phone is on charge after it died during the night. I'm going to the grave as soon as I'm finished up here. You don't have to come with me though if you don't want to" I say whislt beadinh straight for my phone in my bedroom to see how much it has charged.

"Fair enough, I'm sorry I startled you then. But I definitely want to come with. id like to take some flowers as I haven't managed to go as often as I would like to. Plus, spending some time with you is a bonus" Sid says and I see my phone is around sixty percent.

"Okay, I need to go to the flower anyway. Who's car we going to take?" I ask as we then head downstairs

"Yours, but in driving I've yet to test drive your car" Sid says smiling widely.

ETHAN'S POV

I woke up to my phone ringing and u answered it without even checking who was calling "Hello" I say

"Ah Ethan, about time you answered my calls" I hear my mum says.

"Its the only time you called me" I say.

"Excaulty, be nice if you could call me sometimes as well" My mum says.

"Aren't you ment to be on a plane?" I say.

"How do you know that?" My mum asks.

"Sienna told me your all of to Barcelona, thats how I know that" I say rubbing my eyes as I sit up to get out of bed..

"Ah, yes. Me and your dad flew out yesterday though as figured be nice to have a day just to ourselves. How is Sienna?" My mum asks

"Yeah, she is okay. How come you ask for Sienna first before me. Don't you live me anymore?" I ask

"Don't be silly, but at least she says hi to me when her mum rings me. I don't hear from you for days on end. Anyway, I was ringing to say come by Wednesday evening. I want to have dinner with you, bring Sienna as well. From what I hear you two went on a date and it would be nice to see her" my mum says

"Okay, but I will have to ask Sienna. Don't go grilling her though" I say knowing Excaulty what my mother is like.

"I won't, so see you both at seven. I gotta go now love you bye" my mum says hanging up as I say "Wait" but its to late she has gone and I bet she didn't even have to go. I bet she just didn't want me arguing it out.

Just bloody great I think to myself as I get out of bed and decided it was a strong coffee morning needed. Is it morning still? I went to bed late after all I think to myself as I check my phone and see its already one in the afternoon. Stronh coffee afternoon then, and a quick one at that since it won't be long before I have to go to Harry's. With that thought in mind I switch on the kettle deciding I'd make my drink before heading for a shower.

I made me drink and then showered quicker than a chicken could cross the road. I then wrapped the towel around my waist going g to get coffee before going back to my room to grab some clothes. deciding on a Black tracksuit today with a with t-shirt. I then packed up my bag for weekend. Glad to finally be ready I finished my drink off before going to make enougher one as Harry started a group call.

"Hello" I say answering and Harry and Charlie both say.

"Whats with the group call?" I ask.

"Just making sure your all still ready to be here for four" Harry says

"And that could of taken a simple text" Charlie says but then Sid answers the call saying "Now isn't a good time. I will call you back later"

"Why what's wrong?" Harry asks as I Say "Whats up?" and Charlie says "Are you busy with Jordan?"

"No, I went to grave with Sienna. But then she asked for time alone so i gave it stood a good distance away. She has been sat there for a nearly a hour crying. I was about to go back over when you rang" Sid says.

"Oh that's not good then" Harry say.

"You want me to come over and help?" I say as Charlie says "Give her a few more minutes".

"Hang on she maybe answering the call. Don't say anything" Sid says just in time before Sienna answers the phone and says "Who started tbe group call?" and you can tell Sienna has been crying.

"Hey princess, how come you took so long to join the call. By the way it was me who started it just checking your all still be here for four if not that's okay as well" Harry says

"Yeah, I'm still coming, actually Sid I'm done now if you want to start the car up. We can go grab drinks before going to get Maria and then Ethan" Sienna says.

"Where you going for a drink?" Charlie asks as Harry also says "Great, I can't wait to see you princess" then I quickly get in "Let me know what time your get for".

"We may as well Grab you first Ethan. make sense than going back on ourself.. What you reckon half hour Sienna?" Sid says.

"Don't you want to switch cars first?" Sienna says

"Nah, times getting on. We can just use yours if you don't mind" Sid says.

"Whats this about cars?" Charlie asks.

"We are car sharing to save taking them all. Id of offered to pick you up but we will be oiy of space with all us as it is. Maybe you and Harry can car share tomorrow" Sid says.

"Nah, we stopping at the services mate. Someone is going to be switching because I wanna test drive Sienna car" Charlie says.

"Why is it when I get a new car you all wanna teat drive it?" Sienna says.

"Because it fun, we all realised drive each others to be fair" I say

"I already driven Siennas car" Harry says gloating".

"Your all crazy, I gave t test driven any of your cars" Sienna says.

"Not true you driven mine" Sid says.

"Well except yours" Sienna says.

"Your welcome to test drive mine tomorrow" Harry says

"Thats a great idea, you can test drive Harry's while I test drive yours" Charlie says.

"Alright, I'm going now anyway. Be ready soon Ethan" Sienna says.

"Yeah, I'm gonna go as well. As I'm about to drive" Sid says.

"Okay, see you all soon" Harry says.

"Yeah, Oh Sienna make sure its a extra large hot chocolate with whipped cream" Charlie says

"What makes you say that?" Sienna asks.

"Because you sound like you been crying and hot chocolate always cheers you up" Charlie says.

"No, I've not been crying. I just need a drink hence the stop for a drink. Speak to you all soon" Sienna says then she disconnects the call swiftly followed by Sid

"Why did Sienna just lie to us. Sid already told us she has spent a hour crying. Like we will understand. She doesn't have to hide being upset because she went to see visit the babys grave" Charlie says.

"Maybe, she doesn't want to worry us. After all she didn't tell us she went to the grave or is there. Maybe she just wanted to keep that moment to herself" I say hoping Sienna is okay.

"Good point, make sure not to say anything then" Harry says.

"Okay, right I'm going i still have to pack my bag. I won't be long though" Charlie says.."Yeah I'm going to go as well since they won't be long before collecting me" I say.

"Okay, then I shall crack on with the food. Make sure you all drive safe" Harry says