Bottoms Out

Chapter 1 Jacksonville, FL “WHAT DO WE DO about what?” Mickey said. Chris pointed in the general direction of Teddy’s room. “Oh, that,” Mickey said. “Yes, that. When it comes to raising a child, neither of us knows s**t about shit.” “Neither do brand-new parents who’ve just had a baby. They learn on the job, so to speak, and so will we.” “You make it sound so easy,” Chris said. “Babe! I know it isn’t going to be easy, but I think it’ll be fun.” “I’ll hold you to that and remind you of it from time to time when the going gets rough.” “Christopher Bottoms! Are you having second thoughts about this? Because if you are, it’s way too late for that.” “Of course not. Teddy is my brother—well, half brother, if you must. I fully intend to see that he has a better chance at life than I did at his age.” “That’s a good attitude,” Mickey said, “as long as you don’t go overboard and spoil him.” “Yeah. We need to make a list.” “A list of what?” “Things we need to do and/or buy. You know—find a school; buy school supplies; Grandma said that he needs clothes, and I agree. He’ll need a computer, and—” Mickey put a finger to Chris’s lips to silence him. “We’ll deal with that in the morning.” “Mickey! We won’t be here in the morning. You’ll go to work, and I’ll have to deal with things.” “And you’ll deal with them just fine. Why don’t you take Teddy for a ride and show him the neighborhood? Maybe even go to the beach?” “I can’t go to the beach with him by myself,” Chris said. “Why not?” “Because I wouldn’t be able to run into the surf after him, that’s why. Did you forget this ugly bag I have hanging from my belly?” “You’re a nurse, Chris. Surely, there are ways to swim while wearing an ostomy bag.” “Yeah. Now that you mention it, I think there are.” “Then do a little research and find out,” Mickey said. “Why don’t we take him to the beach this weekend.” “Whatever,” Chris said, clearly anxious to end the conversation. “It’s been a long and exhausting day, Mickey, can we go to bed now?” “No argument there. Let’s.” They undressed for bed and settled into their favorite position for sleep, too tired to consider other possibilities. They were awakened the next morning when Teddy wandered into their bedroom. “I’m hungry,” he said. “Go down to the kitchen,” Chris said. “I’ll be there in a minute. Do you like cereal?” “Yes, Sir.” “Okay. There are two or three kinds of cereal in one of the cupboards and milk in the fridge. As soon as I’m through in the bathroom, I’ll be down.” “I’ll go downstairs with him now,” Mickey said, then pulled the covers back on his side of the bed and stood up. Teddy’s eyes widened just a bit at that. “What’s the matter, kiddo?” Mickey said. “Haven’t you ever seen anybody sleep naked before?” “Yes, Sir. Most of Ma’s boyfriends did that, but I wasn’t allowed in the bedroom.” “If you weren’t allowed in the bedroom, how do you know they slept naked?” Chris said. “They weren’t very careful about closing the door.” Oh f**k! Chris thought. I wonder what else they weren’t careful about? Mickey retrieved a robe from their closet, donned it, and tied it around his waist. “Come on, Teddy,” he said. “Let’s go see about breakfast.” When he heard Mickey and Teddy’s feet on the stairs, Chris got out of bed, grabbed a robe, and went to the bathroom to deal with his bodily needs. It took a while to first catheterize himself, then deal with the ostomy bag, but he eventually hurried down the stairs and found Mickey and Teddy at the kitchen table. Mickey had orange juice and coffee in front of him and was eating an apple. Teddy was happily dealing with orange juice and cereal. “We were hungry, so we didn’t wait for you,” Mickey said. “I didn’t expect you to,” Chris said. “Pour yourself a cup and have a seat,” Mickey said. Chris rounded up the same things Mickey had at his place and settled down at the table. “I was ready for this,” he said between sips of coffee. “What’s on your agenda for this morning?” Mickey said. “First things first—get Teddy enrolled in school.” “Which school?” “St. Mark’s Episcopal Day School, of course.” “Why that school, and why ‘of course’?” “Because it’s arguably one of the best in the city; because it’s right down the street in Ortega; and because the kids of all our friends go there.” “Sounds good to me. What if they don’t have an opening?” “Then we’ll come up with plan B.” “Since you’ve got things under control, I’m going to go get dressed for work.” “Have at it, and don’t forget to inquire about day care.” “Will do,” Mickey said, and headed for the stairs.