Many Words In Silence

Chapter 5

They were still putting tables and chairs out on the sidewalk, creating a bigger coffee shop than what it actually was. I personally thought it was perfect in size from where I was sitting. Small enough to be intimate, but at the same time big enough to hire out the place and pack seventy people inside for a nice party.

That’s something I have always wanted. A party. Like a proper birthday party. I didn’t want a birthday that I spent the whole day in a cemetery with Blake, and then getting into a fight with Sam that would lead me to Llaluna’s house a few hours after. That was not what birthdays should be about. It should be about drinking too much, missing the year that had past, and getting useless birthday presents that you would never use, but keep because of their sentimental value. Birthdays should be more like the parties Lucy throws a few times a year. She celebrates every single part of her life. The anniversary for leaving school. The anniversary to her first step she ever gave as a baby, and to top it all off, for the most fun party in the world… You guessed it – the day she got presented her very first credit card without a limit from daddy dearest.

The parties have always looked like so much fun, but I never truly attended. Sure, I went there for Lucy, but it felt wrong to enjoy myself that much when Blake was somewhere in a hole in the ground, rotting away to the point where he would be nothing more than a skeleton wearing the clothing that was so lovingly chosen for his funeral. Sam told me he looked handsome. I don’t know. Sometimes I wish he took a photo of Blake in the coffin. At least that way I could have seen him one last time, but he didn’t. I guess it wouldn’t have been appropriate.

“Penny for your thoughts?” Fynn asked as he sat down across from me. Two steaming cups of coffee being placed between us by a waiter looking no older than 16 years old.

“Huh?” I answered as I looked him in the eyes. I still could not get over it. Half of me screamed to get the hell away from this stranger, and the other half of me wanted to drink in every single moment I had of him. He looked so much like Blake. Maybe a little bit too much. It wasn’t healthy, I know. I needed to get out of here, and soon.

“You were staring into space. I was just wondering what you were thinking about?” Fynn repeated as he brought his cup to his lips. “s**t! It’s hot,” he mumbled as he crashed the cup down on the table, making some of the hot coffee spill.

“I guess the coffee is really hot,” I observed, ignoring his question. My thoughts has never had anything to do with anybody, and if there was one thing I was trying to teach myself with the cross over my mouth it was that I should keep my thoughts to myself.

As if he could read my mind he asked; “And the cross over the mouth? What’s that about?”

“Just a reminder of the past,” I answered vaguely. I had no intention to really strike up a conversation with this beautiful stranger.

“What in the past does it remind you off?” he asked again. God, this man was just full of awkward questions.

“Does it matter?” I asked.

“If it is still so much a part of your life that you feel the need to show it to the world, then it must matter quite a bit,” Fynn answered as he lifted his cup again, braving the warm content. This time however he blew over the coffee before taking a small sip.

“I won’t hold you up too long. My friend is on her way. You can actually leave if you want too,” I said. He must have been on his way somewhere when he hit me. I’m sure he had a life, unlike me.

“No rush. I don’t mind being here with you Elijah. May I ask a personal question?” Fynn asked. I wanted to bombard him with questions so that he could feel what it feels like when a stranger is interrogating you, but I liked the way his lips moved when he spoke. It was enthralling, the way his upper lips made an arch.

I wait until the moment gets awkward and Fynn’s lip drops before I answer.

“Ask.”

“You’re gay right?” Fynn says, his lip curling again.

“More and observation rather than a question,” I say. “Why do you want to know?”

Things have just gotten more interesting for me, looking at Fynn. There could be a million reasons why he had asked the question, but I knew the answer that I wanted.

“Just wanted to know…” Fynn said as he looked away, beckoning the waiter to come closer.

Before I can ask a follow up question the waiter is at our table.

“Are you ready to order?” the teen asks us.

“I don’t know about my buddy Elijah here, but I would love a chocolate muffin, nice and hot,” Fynn says to the waiter with a flashing smile. It almost looked like he was trying to flirt. And then he added; “A phone number on the side would be well received.”

The waiter blushed.

I felt like I wanted to vomit as I tried my best to get the attention of the teenage waiter, ordering myself a bran muffin and then shooing him away.

“Do you have any idea how old that kid is? I mean, how old are you? Thirty? That’s like cradle snatching!” I whisper in loud outrage, yet Fynn was still smiling like Christmas has come early.

“Well, it’s entirely your fault,” Fynn said as he dragged his hand through his beautiful, thick set of hair.

“How does any of this relate to me?” I asked in obvious shock. I could only imagine all my frown lines showing since my hair was short enough to show them now.

“If you don’t go on a date with me, you will force me, being a very lonely guy to take refuge with a teenager. You would possibly turn me into a paedophile just because I would need a distraction to keep your face from my every thought,” Fynn said as he pushed his hand across the table toward mine. I took mine off the table the moment I realised what was happening.

“You’re sick,” I said. I do however add, “You must be joking,” just in case it truly was a joke.

“Yes, I’m joking. The question however remains; is it working out in my favour?”

Fynn was everything I didn’t like in a guy. Obviously vain. Extremely cocky to the point where I wanted to smack him. Maybe even a little bit narcissistic if he was really giving the teenage waiter false hope. The only thing he had going for him was the fact that he looked just like Blake. Too much like Blake in my opinion.

Luckily I was saved from making any rash decisions or answering Fynn’s question.

“Oh my baby! There you are! My little Buckbeak Blitz! Are you okay?!”

I didn’t even need to look up to know that Lucy was on her way over to where I was sitting, arms outstretched. Still I did look, noticing she was holding two shopping bags from designer stores which could not have possibly been open this time of the morning.

“How did you get to shop this early? Everything’s still closed,” I asked her as she approached the table.

“I bribed some people. Money makes the world go round baby. Now tell me what the old b***h did to you,” she said as she sat down right next to Fynn without even looking at him.

“Lucy. Meet Fynn,” I said loud enough to get her of the subject.

“Holy f**k!” she shouted loudly as Fynn stuck his hand out to her.

“Lucy!” I whispered as loud as I could through my teeth. “Behave.”

“But… he… he… he…”

There was almost never a moment that Lucy did not know what to say, but every once in a while something shook her enough to make her speechless for a few moments. The last time it happened was when she found out One Direction was really splitting up.

“Yes. I know. He looks very familiar,” I said to her with a raised eyebrow – urging her to catch the hint and not say anything.

“You can say that again,” Lucy mumbled, obviously catching my wordless conversation with her. “Where did you pick him up?”

“Actually I ran his legs out from under him,” Fynn said with a smile as he turned toward Lucy. “He was nice enough to fall right on his back in front of me, legs wide spread as he glanced at me the very first time with those beautiful eyes.”

This time I was the speechless one. Was he actually trying to flirt with me through my friend? Lucy however looked him up and down for a minute where the table got completely quiet.

“Okay. I like you,” she said as she turned away from him and towards me. “Cocky one isn’t it? Doesn’t seem like your time, but meat is meat…”

“Lucy!” I could feel my cheeks getting red. Did I really need to blush like this.

“Actually Elijah here was just about to agree to go on a date with me before you walked in.

“Finally! You have no idea how much he needs to get laid. I keep telling him; Elijah, you need to get laid before the spiders start thinking your ass is a nest, and then nobody will ever want to have s*x with you ever again.”

Lucy was talking so loudly that the people from a table nearby started throwing glances into our general direction. I wanted to melt away into the earth. There was nobody like Lucy to embarrass you to the point where suicide feels like a better option than being friends with her. I also knew if I tried to reprimand her for it she would just take it to the next level.

“You are quite a b***h. I can’t see someone as gentle as Elijah here being friends with Barbie from the Playboy House at all,” Fynn said just as loudly, looking Lucy directly in the eyes, making it look like they were having a stare down competition.

“Stop,” I said. “People are looking.”

Both of them ignored me.

“The only reason my little pet is sitting here with you is because you look like someone he f****d once upon a time. You will never be anything more than a rebound,” Lucy spat.

This was going to get really nasty. I contemplated what the best way would be to get out of the coffee shop without the two of them noticing me. At this point I was even contemplating going back to Llaluna. Much less public embarrassment.

“You nasty beach blonde Barbie,” Fynn said. “We should sooo be friends!”

All of a sudden they were hugging each other.

“You’ll never change Fynn! You f*****g asshole!” Lucy exclaimed as she pulled him in for an even bigger hug.

“Neither will you, you old slut!” he said back loudly.

I was left. The third wheel on the cart, feeling like a f*****g question mark.