Gold and Guarded Hearts

PROLOGUE May 2018 Tucson, Arizona. Leighton stared at me with disdain, disgust, and something else I couldn’t quite name. There I was, standing wide-eyed at the door of his high-rise bachelor loft like a little lost puppy. And he didn't even bother to let me in. "I'm going to ask you one last time, Divitia," he said angrily, "Of what value do you think you, a mere kitchen assistant, are to me?" My mind went blank. Words didn’t just fail to come out; they didn’t even form. How does anyone answer a question like that? "Leighton, I.....", I started, my voice barely above a whisper. He waited. When it became obvious that I had nothing to say, he scoffed. said: "Of course you don't," he said coldly. “Because you have no value to me.” The sentence hit me directly in the chest, my heart constricting as each word was spoken. For a second, I thought I might actually collapse under the weight of it. "Now I’m only going to say this once,” he continued. “I don’t ever want to see you here again.” My throat burned. “Don’t contact me. Don’t speak to me. Wherever you see me, act like I don’t exist. Whatever we had is over.” Each sentence felt final. Deliberate. Cruel. A final nail to the coffin of our relationship. “You can’t be part of my future,” he added, his voice quieter now, but no less cutting. “Because where I’m going… isn’t where you’re going.” And then..... “Get out of my life. And don’t come back.” He shut the door in my face. Just like that. I don’t know how long I stood there. Seconds? Minutes? All I know is that my eyes were fixed on the intricate wood carvings on the door, tracing patterns I didn’t care about, just to avoid thinking. Eventually, I turned. I picked up my cheap suitcase, the one holding everything I owned, and walked down the hall toward the elevator. As I stepped inside, I tried to steady my breathing. Was it because of the tight space? Or because I was on the verge of breaking apart? I didn’t know. I just knew I needed control. By the time I reached the lobby, I kept my head down and walked quickly, avoiding eye contact with everyone, especially Alfie, the kind overnight doorman. I couldn't risk falling apart now. Not yet. Outside, the night had already settled over 4th Avenue, but I kept walking. And walking. And walking. Until I found myself in a small, nearly empty park. I sat on a cold bench, dropped my suitcase beside me, and finally, broke....... I don’t know how long I cried for, but with the way my head hurt when I had released everything, it was quite a while. When I was done, I looked up at the sky, searching for something, anything, a sign, to tell me that everything was going to be better. There was nothing. All I could see was an empty sky without a moon. A sign of hopelessness, I thought. Then quietly, a tiny voice echoed in my head, "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding." "Shut up!" I whispered. Then louder, "Shut the hell up." My voice cracked through the silence of the park. “So you want to talk to me now?” I shouted. “After everything? After all this time, you finally have something to say?” I laughed bitterly. “You watched all of this happen… and you did nothing.” My chest rose and fell rapidly. “And now you want me to trust you?” I shook my head, “No. I won’t.” I stood up, pacing, anger replacing the tears. Thankfully, there was no one in the park to see me losing my mind. “I’m going to take my destiny into my own hands,” I said. “I’m going to build a life for myself. One that actually means something.” My voice steadied. “I’m going to prove that you’re nothing but a being who sits back and plays with people’s lives.” The words felt dangerous. I shouted a few more choice expletives at the sky before crashing down on the park bench. That night, I made a decision. I was going to be a rich woman. No, scratch that — I was going to be a very wealthy woman. I was going to show Leighton that I could be someone of value. I was going to show "God", if he even existed, that my life could be great without him. I didn’t need a man. And I didn't need God. I was going to prove it. Hell yes, I was going to. I was going to be a walking, talking, moving, money-making machine force of a woman. And no one...... No one would stop me.