Words That Can't Be Written

Chapter 22

I apply at San Donato Hospital, nag-aantay na lamang ako ng confirmation that may papers are approved, and I can proceed to work as an intern for 3 months. I don't know how I will tell this to Aiden. Ang alam ko kasi I can just work for 1 month base sa sinabi saakin ng dean.

I lost my thoughts when I suddenly bumped into someone. She's wearing a white coat and holding his clipboard.

"I'm sorry,"

I looked at her, but I didn't expect that she would be shocked upon looking at me. I was also shocked when she held me and she whispered something in my ears.

Yinakap ko na lamang siya pabalik at marami ng doctors ang nakikiusisa.

"Your daughter, Dr. Ramirez?" Someone asked.

"She's like your mini you, Ashkenazi. Ang tagal ng nagtrabaho ka dine, for sure hindi mo nakikita anak mo kaya ganyan ka kasabik. Why dont you take for a break first? Ako na bahala sa pasyente mo." Komento pa ng iba.

Hindi ko alam kung paano ko kakausapin ang babaeng nasa harapan ko. Pinakawalan niya ako at ganon din ang ginawa ko. Tinitigan ko ang mukha nya at doon ko napagtanto tama lahat ng sinasabi nila. I look like my tita.

"Why are you here? Did your mom know you are here?" She sounds so concern to me, mayroong kumirot sa dibdib ko at nanabik na mayakap nya muli.

She loves my mother, and she will do everything for the happiness of my mom. But she doesn't deserve my mom.

"She doesn't know I am here. Im here to look for you, I want you and dad to talk," diretsa kong sabi sa kanya.

Nagulat pa siya ng sabihin ko iyon. Gusto niyang tumanggi pero iniisip niya ako. Basa ko sa mata nya na ayaw nya akong tanggihan na baka masaktan ako kung gagawin nya iyon.

Hindi ko alam kung paano nagawang saktan ni mom ang kapatid niyang walang ginawa para sa ikabubuti nya. She even sacrificed her happiness, home, and peace for my mom.

I don't know why I am starting to hate my own mom, and I believe everything that this woman will tell me.

"Where do you stay? Do you want to live with me? To lessen the expenses and... It's hard to live here in Italy for that too long without someone."

Tumango ako sa kanya at sinundan sya. Pinapasok jiya ako sa office nya. Inilibot ko ang paningin ko sa office nya at nakita ko ang picture sa isang stands. It's a baby picture. It's looks like me indeed. Is this her daughter?

"She's Raquel, my daughter, I lost her when she's still in my tummy. I've missed her." Saddness envelopes her statement. I feel sad about her situation.

"Is she your daughter with my dad?"

Tumango lamang siya at napuno ng katahimikan ang kanyang office. Lumapit ako sa kanya at yinakap. Hindi ko alam kung anong nagtulak sakin na gawin iyon. Pakiramdam ko kailangan lang naming dala dahil ito ang magbibigay saamin ng peace na matagal na naming hinahanap.

"Do you want to live with me? I'll contact your father that you are living with me so he can rest assured that you are okay during your internship here,"

I was shocked when she knew about my plan.

"I was the one who checked an applicant's papers, and I saw your resume, so I ran to the office to look for you,"

"Sure, after my intership, can we go back to the Philippines for you and dad to talk?"

I feel that she's a bit hesitant to my decision, and I knew that she won't agree that fast. She protected her inner peace for too long, and I know she had already forgotten the past and didn't prepare this time to face this.

"S-sure, I-I plan to go home to the Philippines, but I-I didn't expect to be this early and because of your favor."

Tumango ako sa kanya at tinanggap ang tubig na ibinigay nya saakin. Matagal ko siyang tinitigan, hindi ko kamukha si mom pero ang babaeng nasa harap ko ay kamukhang-kamukha ko. We even have the same mannerism to shutters when I am in uncomfortable situation and having a reds spot in my body when I can't decide.

Who's this person? And who I am?

"Did your father send you here to find me?" She asked and patiently waiting for my answer.

"He don't, I was the one who wants to look for you, actually he tried to stop me because he wish for your peace, but my father deserve the peace also, and it is to talk with you to fix everything in the past."

Tumango-tango siya na para bang hindi nya iyon inaasahan.

Hindi ko maalis ang titig ko sa kanya. Merong may kung ano saakin na gusto ko siyang matagal na makasama. Nawala iyon sa isip ko ng biglang tumawag sa cellphone ko. Before answering this ay tumingin muna ako kay Tita Ashkenazi, she just looked at me and smiled.

"Ashiana, where are you? Manong told me you left for Italy? Without my notice, mija?" Oh! It's my father.

I put my phone in a loud speaker. I did it intentionally para marinig rin ni tita ang pag-uusap namin.

"I'm at San Donato Hospital for my internship, I am with my mentor, Miss Ashkenazi Ramirez."

Narinig ko ang pagsinghap ng marinig iyon ni dad. Hindi na din mapakali si Tita. Hindi ko sila maunawaan bakit ganito na lamang ang epekto nilang dalawa sa isa't isa.

"This is wrong, Ashiana. This will hurt your mom!" May diing sabi ni tita. I didn't mind. Si mom ang gumagawa ng ikakasakit nya. Kung mahal nya at mahalaga sa kanya ang pamilyang ito sana hindi sya naghanap ng iba at pinaramdam niya na mahal nya talaga ako at hindi lang ako assets na pwede niyang magamit kung kailan nya lang gusto.

"Ash, can you look for my daughter for a while? Please don't let ger mom see her,"

I gasped when my father asked. Why did he say that? I know he doesn't love my mom, but he won't do that. He won't hurt my mom without a reason! Ano ba talagang nangyayaring sa pamilyang ito at bakit wala akong alam? Did I really lose all my memories and even forget the past issues? They didn't bother to tell me!

"What's happening, Rigiel! Why don't you want my sister to see her own daughter?"

"I'll tell you, tatapusin ko lang ang kaso at paglumabas ang result pupuntahan ko kayo agad dyan, mag-iingat kayo, I will fly with Arabelle, so don't worry about us."

Agad na naputol ang tawag. Hindi na ako mapakali, nakaramdam ako ng mahigpit na yakap mula sa babaeng nasa harapan ko. She's a stranger to me, but I feel something that I have a close tie to her.

Who are you?

Who I am?