Worlds Above You

Kabanata 11

Kabanata 11

I can't stop staring at the woman who has the face of my mother. I didn't realize tears were forming in my eyes. Hinayaan ko na lamang itong tumulo habang patuloy pa rin ang pagpatak ng ulan. As the rain keeps pouring, I can feel every raindrop splashing on my clothes so I immediately tried myself o act normal as I wiped my tears.

Natigilan ako nang biglang lumuhod si Zyair sa harap ng babae. I saw him broke into tears for the first time. I wonder what exactly happened to him. As much as I wanted to step forward for me to check Zyair, my feet can't even move a bit, so I decided to turn my back off them and slowly walk back to the house.

Nang papalapit na 'ko sa bahay, nakita ko si Alexis na dali daling lumabas na may dalang payong. He immediately stopped as he saw me. Our gaze met as he slowly approaches me. Nanatili lamang akong nakatingin sa kanya. Wala ni isang salita ang lumabas sa aming bibig, we just stared at each other as if we were communicating through our eyes.

"Alexis." tanging sambit ko bago nanghina ang mga tuhod ko at muntik nang mahulog pero agad naman akong inalalayan ni Alexis.

He came closer to make sure that I won't get wet by the rain as we walked inside the house. Nang makapasok kami sa loob ng bahay, we heard a very heated argument between the family of Alexis. The mom and dad of Zyair and Alexis were screaming at each other as we entered the living room.

"I told you papa! Hindi maganda ang plano mong pabalikin ang lalakeng 'yon!" Alexis's mom said.

"Anak mo 'yon, Emelda!" rinig kong sambit ng lolo ni Alexis.

"Hindi ko tinuturing na anak ang taong hindi marunong makinig sa gusto ko." agarang sagot ng Mama ni Alexis.

Bigla kong naalala si Zyair, I guess they're referring to him. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang mararamdaman ko nang marinig ko ang kanilang pinag-uusapan. Especially when their mother neglecting Zyair as his son.

Pumasok kami sa loob ng bahay kaya bigla naman silang napatahimik at tinignan kami ni Alexis. Alexis held my hand as he pulls me on his back as if he is hiding me.

Sumilip ako sa kabilang banda at nagkatagpo ang mata namin ng mama nito na parang umuusok na sa galit habang ang lolo at papa nito ay kalmadong nakaupo lang sa gilid.

"Hatid ko lang si Xia sa taas." seryosong sambit ni Alexis.

Agad naman akong hinila ni Alexis at umalis na sa kanilang harapan. As we walked up the stairs, narinig ko ang pag-uusap muli ng pamilya sa baba.

"The reason why I bought that house is for him to separate his life from us, papa. Walang silbi ang batang 'yon sa atin. Wala tayong mapapala dun." narinig ko ang malutong na sabi ng ama nila Alexis at Zyair.

Napabuntong-hininga naman ako at napailing. I may not know what happened in the past but I don't think Zyair deserved to be treated by his family like this. He may be heartless but I know he still has a good side in some ways.

Kahit sa madaling panahon, pinatuloy niya ako sa loob ng bahay niya even though I'm a complete stranger to him. Nang mapansin ni Alexis ang pag-iba ng mukha ko. Mabilis kaming lumakad habang hawak hawak niya pa rin ako sa pupulsuhan ko.

As we step towards the room, unti unti ko na hindi naririnig ang away pamilya mula sa baba. Nakatulala akong bumalik sa kwarto kasama si Alexis. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang masasabi ko. Do children really have to be useful for their parents to be appreciated?

They should be grateful that their family is still complete unlike me. I lost my mom and a year after my dad also left me. Muli kong naalala ang babae kanina. Hindi pa rin nawawala ang imaheng nakita ko.

I can't be wrong.

I know every inch of my mother's face and she looks exactly like my mother. I felt a sudden pain in my chest when I realized that I'm still longing for my mother.

"Are you going to get change? Lalabas muna ako." Alexis asked.

Hawak hawak niya ang magkabilang balikat ko nang inalalayan niya ako umupo sa stool malapit sa pinto ng kwarto. Umangat ang tingin ko at tumango bilang sagot sa tanong niya.

"Okay... Just call me if you're done." sabi nito bago lumabas ng kwarto.

Agad ako napabuntong-hininga nang maiwan akong mag-isa sa kwarto. Umiling ako para matauhan at nagsimula nang kumilos para maligo kasi basang basa na ako ng dahil sa pagpapaulan kanina.

A few moments later, I found myself lying in the bed. I've been thinking about a lot of things, but I don't know where to start.

First, I really want to get out of this world as soon as possible. Second, I want to kill Zyair for me to get the control card but at the same time I pity him for what happened earlier. And lastly, the kiss.

Though the intention of Alexis is as clearer as the glass, but I still don't get it why he likes me. It's not that I don't deserve to be liked by someone but... we just knew each other.

Yes, aaminin ko. I felt something for Alexis, but I'm not going to let myself fall for him, especially since I might end up loving this world because of him.

Thinking of that idea makes me insane.

Even though the world I lived in is harsh on me, I cannot deny the fact that people are waiting for me, who molded me to become the person I am now.

Bumuntong-hininga ako bago bumangon. Napasapo ako sa mukha ko kasabay ng pagkagat ko sa labi ko. Tumingin ako sa pinto at sa tingin ko Alexis didn't bother to come back here.

He's maybe assuming that I'm already resting. Napabuntong-hininga ulit ako when I realized na ang dami palang nangyari sa akin ngayong araw. Hindi ko alam if all of the things happen to me managed to process in my mind pero gaano ko man isipin wala akong naiisip na solution in any of this.

Tumingin ako sa pinto bago ako nagtungo papunta dun saka napagpasyahang lumabas. The house lights are already dim, it seems like people here in this house are already resting. I stood at the railing thinking nothing.

Literal na wala talaga.

Nakatulala lang sa kabilang pader na nasa harapan ko. Wala ni isang pangyayari ang sumagi sa isipan ko kasi una pa lang hindi ko na alam kung paano ito sisimulan ulit. I feel like my life has been reset because I came into this world.

I sigh multiple times before I hear someone's footsteps towards this floor. Agad akong napaatras sa railing ata napasandal sa pader para hindi ako mahalata sa dilim. Nang marinig kong papalapit na ang bawat hakbang, palihim akong tumingin sa kung sino ang taong aakyat.

After a few minutes, I saw a shadow approaching as it slowly walking. I stepped forward 

Hindi ko masyadong maaninag ang tao kaya umabante ako para malaman kung sino. I don't actually mind other's business but dahil sa nangyari kanina, hindi ko maiwasang maging mausisa sa mga pangyayari sa pamilya na 'to. 

Nang makaabante ako bigla kong napamilyaran ang mukha ng tao nang tumingin ito sa direksyon ko. But it seems like he didn't saw me since it's too dark or he just pretended not to see me?

Our gaze met for a while as he turned his back slowly walking towards his room. I really want to ask if Zyair's fine but I guess it is not the right time to ask him about it. He carries too much in his back right now, he needs to think about it and rest. Agad naman akong tumalikod at nagtungo ulit sa kwarto ko. I guess this concludes my day. 

Kinabukasan, maaga akong nagising para bisitahin si Zyair. I just want to check him out if he's doing fine. I'm still bothered by the fact that I saw him breaking down last night. I just can't believe that he can be that type of a person --- He might be harsh on me sometimes but I guess I get him. I know his feelings.

Lumabas ako ng kwarto ko at nagtungo sa tapat ng kwarto niya. Sumilip ako sa glass railings para tignan kung sino ang mga taong nasa baba kaya agad ko naman nakikita ang mga katulong na abala sa paghahanda ng almusal ng pamilya.

Huminga ako ng malalim bago ako kumatok sa pinto ng kwarto ni Zyair ngunit hindi ito agad bumukas laya kumatok ako ulit pero ganoon pa rin kaya nagpasya na lamang ako na dahan dahang buksan ang kwarto ni Zyair.

When I opened the door, the room is empty. Walang bahid na Zyair dito sa loob. I even step inside the room para tignan if baka nasa CR lang ito pero wala talaga kaya isinara ko na kaagad ito. Nang makatalikod ako, nakita kong lumabas sa kwarto si Alexis na mukhang kakagising lang since he is still wearing his sleeping attire.

Lumakad ako pabalik sa kwarto ko na parang walang ginawa. Napansin naman ako kaagad ni Alexis kaya ngumiti ito sa akin saka niya ako binati.

"Good morning!" he greeted with an overflowing smile on his face.

"Good morning." bati ko pabalik.

"How's your sleep?" tanong nito saka niya ako sinabayan sa paglalakad patungo sa kwarto ko.

"Peaceful. Ikaw?" I responded.

"Hmmm." He paused.

Napahinto kaming dalawa sa paglalakad. It's just 3 steps away from my room's door. Tinignan ko lang si Alexis habang napapaisip sa kung ano isasagot sa tanong ko. Muling nagtama ang mata ko sa labi niya and then I suddenly remember the rain kiss we shared last night. 

Agad akong napalunok at naramdaman ko ang biglaang pamumulo ng aking pisngi aa napaiwas agad ako ng tingin  mula sa kanyang mga labi at umakto na parang may hinahanap ako sa gilid ko.

"May hinahanap ka?"

See? he got it. I'm not a student actress for nothing. Agad naman ako tumingin sa kanya at simpleng ngumiiti.

"Pasok muna ako sa loob." saad ko saka agad na tumalikod na.

Hindi ko na siya nilingon kasi baka hindi ko naman mapigilang kakaisip sa nangyari kahapon. That was too embarrassing. It's not that I didn't want it to happen but for me, I feel like it's really inappropriate to be this happy since there's still a lot of things that I should prioritize and one of them is to fix myself here and find ways to get back to my world.

Hindi pwede na nakatunganga lang ako dito. I don't want to wait for someone to help me, all I have to do is to stand for myself for me to find clues kung bakit napaniginipan ko si daddy the last time at ano ang kinalaman nito sa pagpunta ko dito sa mundong ito. 

I know everything that is happening to me right now is not a coincidence. Simula sa pagrinig ko ng machine sa laboratory ni daddy, I always think that there's something that I needed to know so my focus today is not to go back to my world immediately. I want to find out the truth about what is literally happening in my life.

Bakit ganito ang nangyayari sa buhay ko ngayon? Why do I need to experience this? Have I done enough?

Nakapikit akong napasandal sa pinto ng kwarto. I really don't know what to do and where to start. I know kanina ko pa pinag-iisipan kung saan ako magsiisimula kaso wala ni isang bagay  ang sumagi sa aking isipan kung ano ang gagawn ko.

Napahilamos ako ng mukha.

"Anong gagawin ko?" I muttered to myself as I sound so desperate.

Huminga ako ng malalim bago ako may naalala.I think I know someone who can help me solve my problems. If it means my life, I'll do whatever it takes to get it through. Agad akong tumayo at binuksan ang pinto saka lumabas.

"Alexis."