Loving Lisbeth Salander (XIV Series #1)

The Girl Who Threw a Fist II

“So you were with Connie a while ago.”

I sighed.

The memory of her sharing the same table as me still terrified me. I’ve never felt so distressed. “Don’t remind me that. It’s really,” I paused and realized I couldn’t think of any adverb that could describe how I felt with a while ago. The entire experience was awfully dreadful. “Well, it didn’t turn out great.” I gave up and added, “Everything’s just too awkward with her – she’s awkward. I’m awkward.” It just wasn’t the same no matter how hard I tried to act normal with her. “We’re both awkward so it’s never going to work out with her.” The energy flow I get with Forest was not anything like that. For some reason, Forest gave me this energy boost that enabled me to be so confident around her. Her energy was alluring on its own, that anyone would be drawn in to her.

“Connie’s everyone’s dream girl and here you are,” Harvey pointed at me in dismay and disappointment. It has been that way for quite some time. “Telling me she’s not great enough for you?” He questioned in disbelief. “Complaining that she’s awkward, even!”

“I wasn’t complaining.” I corrected and squinted my eyes the moment I just realized I kind of was complaining, but I didn’t want to take back what I said about not complaining, otherwise, I’m guilty – which I absolutely am. “I was just saying.” I shrugged, looking away in shame. “What’s wrong with calling someone awkward when they really are?” I knew I shouldn’t even be acting this way towards someone who didn’t really do anything wrong to me, but it was just the way it was.

He scowled at me. “It still comes off like that now, does it?”

I sighed, guilty as he said. I couldn’t stop the feelings that were still clenched in cringe. Every time I close my eyes, I could picture how awkward that lunch break turned out. I can never imagine myself with girls like Connie – so fragile and delicate for reckless, ignorant, and unknowing hands like mine.

“Because you’re so madly in love with a demon.”

I frowned diverting my attention back to Harvey, who didn’t seem like he was lying. The small chance of talking about Forest wakes up my dying soul. If there was even the slightest chance of love at first sight to exist in this world, it was this feeling I have for Forest. “And what’s wrong with that?” I genuinely asked. I never understood why people hated the idea of demons. They’re all things bad but once in a while, don’t we all need to learn to love the things that are bad to embrace our true self? Without them, we can’t really classify ourselves as good.

“She’s greed, lust, sloth, pride, wrath—”

I laughed and he stopped enumerating the other two sins as he was caught off-guard by my sudden response. “She can’t be every sin, Harv.”

He crossed his arms. “She already is.” I stared at him trying to get him to say more to defend his claim. He got the message when he started talking about each of the sin. “Wrath, always a mad dog around other students. Greedy, she’s always sleeping in class knowing that everyone stays up late for requirements too. Sloth, I mean,” He made a gesture that told me how obvious it already was that it didn’t need some explanation to further elaborate this claim. “Envy, she’s probably praying she was someone else right now because that’s just the way she is. Lust, she loves parties and we all know what happens there.” I laughed at how accurately wrong he was saying these but at the same time, it also made sense. He’s really takes pride in making himself sound right all the time.

“You don’t know that.” I shook my head in disapproval. “You can’t prove your claims unless you have evidence of it all.” As soon as I said those words, he looked away with a scoff. “Aren’t you being a sin right now yourself for judging someone you don’t know in a certain level for you to say all that?”

He was quiet because he knew I was right.

“What if everything you just said about her isn’t true?” I interrogated and he seemed okay with hearing my side of this argument as well. “I’m not sure you’re willing to accept your allegations when that time comes.” I chuckled, imagining Harvey’s face, tomato red, after finding out that everything he had said about her were nothing but lies and rumors.

“You know, you’re better off as a lawyer.”

My eyes widened at his sudden reply.

“Why are you a journalist writing stories?”

I chuckled. “Because I can only argue this great with you, Harv. Not in front of a judge or an entire assembly of trial watchers.” I said unsurely. I wasn’t knowledgeable of terms they use on court after all.

“A human can’t be with a demon. I rest my case. No further explanations.” He pressed even further.

I laughed harder. The fact that he was so dedicated to change her being to a demon was hilarious. She was obviously not a demon. If she was, she wouldn’t have saved me that night but she did. No demon should be capable of anything good. That’s why they’re demons in the first place. If she turns out to be a demon, only then I’ll accept my defeat. So long as she doesn’t show any act of such as those sins, I would keep defending her and say she’s not at all evil.

“Aren’t you embarrassed for rejecting Connie?” He asked.

I sighed. We’ve had this conversation many times already. Harvey seemed to enjoy me telling him that I was sure that I didn’t like her so he can have a shot at her which I didn’t really mind. I wanted Harvey for Connie. I have no idea how many times I’ve reiterated that. And, God knows, I wish it was them in the end but considering the circumstances, it might be a while before Connie starts to accept that I wasn’t really going to like her despite her hard efforts to show me that she still liked me. “Even before I haven’t met Forest, I never liked Connie.” I confessed and, of course, Harvey knew that. He knew I rejected Connie way before I met Forest. “I’ve told you many times, Harv. She doesn’t have an effect on me.” I frowned. “Not one small spark.”

He grunted and looked away, frustrated. He’d always push me to like her but I can tell he was happy deep inside because he knew we wouldn’t fight for one girl and ruin our unusual friendship. Unusual friendship we still keep regardless of the recurring circumstances that was bestowed upon us the day I met Forest. “Whatever. Don’t come crying in front of me if something happens to you because of that spawn of evil you like so much.”

“What else are you gonna call her?” I tilted my head towards Harvey with a crooked yet still amused smile. I was actually curious this time. I can’t ask for a better way to spend our time in the room waiting for Mr. Dawn.

“Let me think.” He tapped his chin with his index finger, trying to make himself look like he was actually thinking of names to call her. Then he turned to me. “Off limits. Falling Debris. Danger zone.”

I burst into laughter. It was the way he formed a rainbow with his palms in the air that made it much funnier. I imagined the way Gumball did it in one of the episodes of the show. Quite hilarious, really. “She’s not a construction site.”

“Is she not?” He pretended to be shocked, covering his mouth to exaggerate his reaction. “My bad. She looked like she needed a lot of work done.” He kept bobbing his head as he talked as if it would be more insulting that way.

A construction site. Sometimes Harvey comes up with the most creative things. As Harvey kept babbling about what and whatnot Forest was, I heard someone ask from the other side of the room. It was faint but I could hear it clearly the more I leaned to that side they were on.

“Are you coming tonight? At Jack’s party?”

“Jack throws the best parties. For sure, I’m going!”

My head voluntarily turned to the table from where the conversation was made, surprised that my ears were suddenly capable of hearing even the most inaudible things from a distance. I felt powerful. I didn’t know the group of boys that were circled together as they spoke, but they were likely like them.

Party?

My forehead scrunched into a frown as I tried to picture the different scenarios that could happen to me if I attended another party tonight. If I attended a party and learn the beauty in it, would I appreciate the world Forest is exposed to? Are we supposed to appreciate those type of living, even? Am I going to end up being forced to a position where I’m forced to drink an unknown liquid and risk not being saved by Forest this time around?

Questions started flooding my head, and I wasn’t sure how to answer them all on my own.

There’s a huge chance that Forest will be there if Harvey was right with his claim that she parties all the time, but that doesn’t guarantee Forest’s attendance in that party. The question was if I was willing to risk going there to see her. Whatever I looked must have been obvious for Harvey to stop talking because he flashed a concerned look – the type that wasn’t ready to hear what bad news I had stored in my head.

I smiled and looked up to him as I tried to come up with a bribe for him. “Harv—”

“No.” He immediately cut me off as if he had already known what I was about to say so I grinned innocently. Cut off or not, I was ready to hear him decline, but I wasn’t going to give up easily, and I’m sure he knew that as well. “Whatever you’re thinking of doing,” I pouted when he started shaking his head to emphasize his reply to my unsaid favor. “Count. Me. Out.” Ouch.

“I was going to ask for,” I shouldn’t come off as hesitant otherwise my plan would immediately fall down the hole. “Help with Math.” I put on a sad face. Harvey knew I miss out on a lot of Math. I wasn’t a fan of Mathematics so it would seem believable if I used it as an alibi. “We’re having a quiz tomorrow. Pre-Calculus.”

“Oh.” Harvey’s just too gullible, it’s cute.

“I’ll come get you by six?” I offered and he doesn’t seem to be fazed by my sudden invitation of a group study. I was just thankful that he didn’t catch on to my lies because if he did, I would have failed. “Let’s work at my place.”

He raised a brow, his arms crossed seemingly suspicious of how I was acting, but I pushed through with a big innocent smile to throw him off. It was too late to back out and if I did, it would only make things worse between the two of us. “Okay?” He answered unsure.

I gave him an innocent nod and a daring smile once again, hoping to get away with it. My heart raced. I didn’t want Harvey to say no, and I wouldn’t be able to survive that party without him by my side. If he goes there with me, I’d feel more backed up by someone instead of being alone. I had to do whatever it takes to make him say yes.

“Your mom better make cookies or you can kiss Pre-cal good bye.”

I laughed in relief. For a moment, I thought he caught me by my lies but he didn’t. “I’m calling her right now.” At that, I walked away from him pretending to call my mom after pretending to dial her number. The odds are very fond of me and I’m grateful for that.