The Bodyguard

chapter 13

By the time we got back to the house, the sun was beginning to set. I carried the shopping bag upstairs while Alexander followed behind me.

"Did you two have fun?" His mother said from the kitchen when we walked through the house

"We did." I smiled.

"What did you buy?" She looked at the bag in my hand.

"A dress." I said happily.

"Let me see it!" Her eyes lit up.

"Maybe later." I laughed.

"All right. You can wear it this weekend for the family to get together. Dinner will be ready soon." She says.

I nodded my head and we headed upstairs. Once we reached the bedroom, I placed the bag on the chair. Alexander closed the door behind us. For a moment, neither of us spoke. The room suddenly felt much smaller than it had that morning.

I looked down at my hand. The family ring was still there.

"Alexander." I slowly pulled it from my finger.

"Yeah?" He looked at me.

"I think I should give this back." I held the ring out to him.

"Why?" His eyes dropped to the ring.

"Because I shouldn't be wearing it." I replied.

"Why not?" He didn't take it.

"Because your grandmother thinks you're going to propose to me." I let out a nervous laugh.

"She does." He smiled faintly.

"Your mother thinks the same thing." I said.

"She does." He replied.

"And now everyone in your family probably thinks we're getting married." I said looking down.

"Does that bother you?" He stepped closer.

"I don't know." I looked at him. That was the truth.

"You could keep it." He looked at the ring in my hand.

"I shouldn't." I say.

"Why?" He asks.

"Because it's making this feel too real." I reply.

"What if it is?" His expression changed.

"What?" My heart skipped. I stared at him.

"What if it doesn't feel fake anymore?" He took another step toward me. I couldn't answer. He looked down at my hand. "I've been telling myself this is temporary since the day I met you." His voice was quiet. "But today..." He stopped. "Today was different." He finished.

"Because we went into town?" I swallowed.

"Because I forgot." He says.

"Forgot what?" I know what he meant but I wanted to hear it.

"That we were pretending." He said.

"Alexander..." My heart pounded. I looked away.

"I know." He says softly.

"No, I don't think you do." I respond. He waited. I took a shaky breath. "I've spent most of my life pretending to be someone else." He didn't interrupt. "I've had fake names. Fake stories. Fake relationships. I've lied to people for money." I looked down. "But with you..." My voice faded.

"With me?" He stepped closer.

"I don't feel like I'm pretending." I looked into his eyes.

Neither of us moved. The silence between us felt heavier than it should have. Alexander reached for my hand.

"Then don't give it back." He gently closed my fingers around the ring.

"I can't keep it." I stared at him.

"Why?" He asks softly.

"Because if I keep it, I might start believing..." I stopped.

"Believing what?" He waited.

"Nothing." I shook my head.

"You were going to say something." He smiled sadly.

"I changed my mind." I say. I didn't want to say the truth. Saying it out loud mean admitting how I feel.

"Okay." He nodded. He didn't push me. That somehow made it harder.

"What were you going to say?" I looked at him.

"That I might start believing it too." He was quiet for a moment.

"Believing what?" I ask.

"That this could actually be real." He says. I stared at him. Then I looked down at the ring.

"Alexander..." My fingers tightened around it.

"I know." He gently touched my cheek. The same place he'd brushed dirt from weeks ago. Only this time, there was no dirt.

His thumb moved slowly across my skin. I held my breath. He leaned closer. So close I could feel his breath against my face. My heart raced. I knew what was about to happen and I wanted it. That was the problem. I wanted him to kiss me. I closed my eyes. His lips were only inches from mine when I suddenly stepped back. He stopped immediately.

"I can't." I opened my eyes.

"Okay." He nodded.

"I'm sorry." I said.

"Don't be." He lowered his hand.

"I don't know what happens when this is over." I looked at him.

"Neither do I." He says.

"And eventually it will be over." I continue.

He didn't answer. Because we both knew it was true. Eventually, my trial would happen. I'd receive my new identity and I would leave. Alexander would go back to his life and whatever this was between us would have to end. At least, that's what we had both been telling ourselves. I looked down at the ring. Then I slipped it back onto my finger.

"I thought you were giving it back." Alexander watched me.

"I was." I said.

"And?" He smiled.

"I changed my mind." I looked at him with a soft smile.

"Good." His smile grew.

"Don't read too much into it." I laughed softly.

"I won't." He walked toward the door. Then stopped. "Hannah?" He asked.

"Yeah?" I asked. He looked back at me.

"Today was the best day I've had in a long time." He says. My heart softened.

"Mine too." I replied.

He smiled and opened the door. We walked downstairs together. Neither of us said what we were both thinking. Something had changed. The ring was still on my finger and the line between pretending and reality had become almost impossible to see.

The morning of the family gathering, I woke up to the sound of voices downstairs. I stayed in bed for a few minutes, staring at the ceiling. I could already hear Grandma. Which meant I was probably in trouble. I reached for my phone and saw a message from Alexander. Come downstairs before Grandma comes looking for you.

I smiled. Too late. There was a knock on my door.

"Hannah?" I could hear grandma call.

"Coming!" I sat up quickly. I quickly put on the new dress that Alexander bought me the other day. I opened the door. She was standing there with a huge smile. Her eyes immediately went to my left hand. More specifically, the ring on my finger.

"Still wearing it." Her smile grew.

"I like it." I said as I looked down.

"I know." She took my hand. "And you're going to keep wearing it." She states.

"Grandma..." I laughed nervously.

"Come downstairs." She pulled me toward the stairs.

"What are we doing?" I ask.

"Planning." She says with a grin.

"Planning what?" I ask confused.

"Your wedding.” She looked at me like the answer was obvious.

" Come again?" I question with wide eyes.

"You're going to have to get used to it." She laughed.

By lunchtime, the house was full. Aunts, Uncles, Cousins and family friends. Everyone seemed to have shown up.

The kitchen was packed, the living room was loud, and someone was already arguing over what music to play outside.

I stood near the front door outside beside Alexander.

"You okay?" He leaned toward me.

"I'm reconsidering every decision that led me here." I sigh.

"You'll survive." He laughed.

"You said that last time." I point out.

"And I was right." He countered.

"You left me alone with your grandmother and now the family thinks we are engaged.” I looked at him.

"You're still alive." He says.

"Technically." I respond..

He smiled. I couldn't help smiling back. Then Grandma walked into the kitchen. She looked at us and then at my hand. Then at Alexander.

"I have an announcement." She says.

Everyone turned toward her.bI immediately became nervous. Grandma pointed at my ring.

"Hannah is still wearing the family ring." She says happily.

The room erupted. His mother smiled. One of his aunts clapped. Someone shouted, "Finally!" My face went hot. Alexander laughed. I looked at him.

"Do something." I whisper.

He raised his hands.

"I'm staying out of this." He whispers back.

"Traitor." I mutter.

"Come with us." His mother grabbed my hand.

"Where?" I ask letting her drag me.

"Inside." She says.

"Why?" I question, I have a feeling I know where this is going.

"We have things to discuss." She smiled. I looked at Alexander. He was already laughing.

"Help me." I said.

"Good luck." He shook his head.

The women dragged me into the living room. Grandma sat beside me. His mother sat on my other side. Then two of his aunts joined us.

"This feels dangerous." I looked around.

Everyone laughed. His mother pulled out a notebook. I stared at it.

"No." I said.

"We're not planning the wedding." She laughed.

"We're just discussing possibilities." Grandma leaned closer.

"That sounds the same to me." I mutter with a sigh

They started asking questions. Did I want an outdoor wedding? What kind of dress did I like? Would I want flowers? Did I want something small? I answered what I could. But every now and then, my eyes drifted toward the doorway.

Alexander was outside with his father and brothers. He caught me looking and smiled. I smiled back. For a moment, everything felt strangely normal. I wasn't hiding or running. I wasn't worried about the next fake name I'd have to use. I was sitting in a house full of people who had somehow started feeling like family. That scared me more than I wanted to admit.

Later that afternoon, I slipped upstairs. I needed a break from the noise. I went into my room and sat on the bed. My notebook was on the nightstand. I picked it up. Writing things down has always been a habit. When I couldn't say something out loud, I wrote it. When I needed to remember something, I wrote it. Lately, I've been writing a lot about Alexander.

I opened to the latest page. Favorite coffee: black. No sugar. Hates crowded restaurants. Gets quiet when he's worried. Checks doors without thinking. Loves his mother's cooking. Pretends he hates Grandma teasing him. He doesn't.

I smiled. Then I added another. Always notices when I'm uncomfortable. I paused. Then wrote: He remembers little things I tell him. I stared at the page. Then turned to another. Things I still don't know about Alexander: Middle name, favorite childhood movie, first girlfriend, and exact birthday. I laughed softly.

For someone who supposedly had been dating him for eight months, I still had a lot to learn. I turned the page. Then, without thinking too much about it, I wrote: I'm starting to know him better than I know myself.

I stopped. My heart gave a strange little beat. I closed the notebook. Someone called for me downstairs. I stood up quickly and left the room. I forgot the notebook on the bed.