Because Of Him

When we went on an adventure

His lips swirled onto my lips like butter. His small pecks became longing minutes. I didn't want him to pull away. But I wasn't sure why he did this. Was there something more? More than just being friends or strangers? Was there something more that I did not know? Nor knew if I felt that something else also?

Questions pounded against my skull as I seemed to zone out and Hayes seemed to do all the kissing himself. After that, Hayes pulled away slowly.

"I'm sorry. I just-"

"It's okay." I said cutting him off. The wind chimed as I slowly stared twisting the knob to the door. "So..."

"I'm sorry again." Hayes said.

"Hayes, it's fine."

"No. I mean. Yes but. No, look. I'm really really sorry of what I said. I do care, it's just, I didn't know what came over me. Guess I was just afraid and angry"

"You? Afraid?"

"I know..."

"Afraid of what?"

"That's the problem. I don't know."

"What do you mean, you don't know?"

"I mean, I don't know. I've always been like this. Afraid but never sure why."

"Grier, you're talking crazy shit."

"Funny. Cause I am crazy s**t" Hayes said. Which caused me to laugh.

"You wanna come in?" I said, fully opening the door. Over my shoulder I saw Dante and harmony both brought back their attention towards us, both with shocked and confused looks. Hayes looked down as he picked at the floor with the tip of his shoe. He brought his gaze back up and inside my house, staring at Dante. "Um. No. It's okay. Do you think we could meet up later?" He said as he started backing out of the driveway. "what? It's literally 8 pm right now, what're you-?"

"I'll see you later!" He yelled as he dropped his skateboard and skated down the street with streaking sounds coming from the wheels of his board. I sighed and shook my head.

That kid.

I went inside and felt the warm tingly feeling inside again. Knowing things were fine now meant I had to hide the joy, bubbly feeling that brought smiles onto my face. But the same question remained inside my head. Why did he look at Dante and suddenly have the look of nervousness flowing across his face?

I sat back down onto the couch facing harmony and Dante. "Why do you seem so giggly?" Harmony asked.

"I'm not" i mumbled as I failed to prevent the smile for overpowering my face.

"Yes you are, is it because of Hayes?"

"What-? No! I just-"

"SHE LOVES HAYES! SHE LOVES HAYES! EVERYBODY. THIS GIRL HERE. WITH THE NAME OF-"

"Shut up! Don't say my name!"

"Why not?" Dante said as he gave me a foul look.

"Because"

"Because?"

"Because I don't like my name. It's stupid and so is the meaning."

"The meaning is beautiful" Dante said, and I felt my cheeks turn a light shade of red.

"Thanks but, I just don't believe in the meaning of my name you know?"

"I get it. But I really think you should."

"People tell me that. But i-"

"Dear, can you call your sister?" Aunt savannah said. "Be right back" I said to Dante and harmony before sprinting up the stairs. My sister's bedroom door was closed, per usual. I opened the door, only to find the room empty. I known she was out earlier today, but I thought she would've snuck in the house without me nothing and would be back right now. She was never out later than this time. Sure my sister was...something. But she never was one to have me nor mom worried. I walked into her room and saw the closet was messy and clothes were thrown all across the room. the smell of perfume filled my lungs. The perfume was recognizable. She never wore this perfume unless she was going out to impress a boy...

A boy..

That's it.

Maybe she was just out with Nash.

I sighed, I was fine with whatever she did. But I knew mom and aunt savannah wouldn't be too happy if they knew she was out with a boy.

Especially the bad boy's older brother

I sprinted back down into the living room where both Dante and harmony carefully sat and slightly jumped as I stormed into the kitchen with the smell of baking cookies instantly caused my mouth to drool. "Um, Rachel is-uh- she went for a late workout" lies.

"Really?"

"Yeah," lies. "She messaged me as I was going up the stairs. She said she'll be back later tonight." Lies.

"Is that okay with your mother?" Aunt savannah asked.

"Yeah, positive, 100%" lies. Just lies everywhere. Aunt savannah gave me a little smile as I backed out the kitchen. I let out a sigh of relief and plopped my entire body onto the couch. "What now?" Dante asked

"Hm?" I replied as I panted.

"Rachel isn't really out to workout is she?" He whispered as he leaned his head closer towards harmony and I.

"You both know me so well" I smirked.

"Cookies are done!" Aunt savannah yelled and Dante, harmony, and I ran towards the kitchen. Just like how we use to, when we were young.

*

That was basically my night. I spent it by watching a various amount of movies with 2 of by best friends and my favorite aunt. I actually couldn't ask for more. As the movie played, from time to time, I would give small glances towards the door. With hope that maybe, just maybe, Hayes would come in and sit beside me. How wonderful would that all be.

Once it was getting really late, aunt savannah Had gone home and my mom arrived home from work. She gave small hellos to harmony and Dante and quickly went up the stairs. She looked so tired and worn out that I decided to just let her sleep. Harmony had gone home around the same time that aunt savannah had gone home, but Dante stayed even longer. Once he finally caved in of exhaustion he officially announced that he was going home and I had walked him to the door. "Night." He said mumbly through the fatigue in his voice. "Night," I said. "Wait."

"Yeah?" Dante said as he looked over his shoulder before giving me his full on attention, shifting his weight to face me.

"Tell me." I demandingly said

"Tell you what?"

"About Hayes. And why you're being so secretive and mysterious"

"I'm not"

"Stop lying, we both know you suck at lying"

"Fine. I'm just helping him with a project" he said as he looked down and his dark hair fell forward covering his eyes.

"A project? What kind of project?"

"A writing project."

"Writing? Hayes doesn't write"

"That's why I'm helping him"

"If he needed help he could've just asked me." I said.

"He probably knew how you have not written in a long time and never plan to."

"Wrong"

"Wrong?"

"I wrote today."

"And how did it feel?"

"Wonderful"

"Yeah?," he mumbled as he turned around with only his back facing me. "Well that's probably how Hayes feels around you" he muttered as he quickly started making his way down the driveway.

"What was that Dante?!" I said.

"Nothing! Now go to bed!" He yelled as he gave me a giddy smile before turning the corner to the next street. I knew he knew something I didn't. But I was to exhausted to even think about it. So without hesitation, I dragged myself into my room, and wrote for a bit and fell asleep with happy thoughts.

Thoughts that would keep me up smiling rather than drowning myself in tears.

**

Around 4 am, I heard a sound at my window. The sound of rocks clanging onto the sides and on the glass. I smiled at the ceiling before bringing myself to actually get up. My heart raced and adrenaline rush flew through my veins where exhaustion was no longer an option. He was back. Hayes is back. He's actually back.

I flipped the curtains to the side, opened the window and peaked my head out.

The air was moist and cold and streetlights kept the streets awake, along with several cars passing and the distant moon light. I saw at the road there was a car, a car that was familiar to me.

I looked over at the shadow that stood in the front lawn. But it was not Hayes,

Instead, it was my sister.

"Pack up little sis. We're going on a little adventure with the Grier's, well, 2 of the Grier's" she said as she smirked at me.