Holding On

Chapter 2

Allie's P.O.V

I sat shocked and really not knowing what to do. After all these years he still wanted me. The thought made me both happy and sad. I loved knowing that he still had feelings for me but then I felt like I was doing something wrong for liking it.

"What did Matthew want?" Macy asked walking into the room.

"Well, don't keep me in suspense."

"Hello earth to Allie," She said waving her hand in my face.

"He still wants me Macy." I said looking up at her.

"This surprises you why? You’re his true mate Allie. You can't tell me that you don't have any feeling for him anymore. Or don't you?”

"What exactly did he say?" She said pacing.

"He said that he will never stop loving me and that he will wait as long as he has to for me."

"Macy, he's with someone and has been for a few years." I said frowning.

"And that matters why?" She replied.

"What do you mean? She has got to love him I can't break that…”

"Hold up Alli,” Macy said interrupting me midsentence.

 What did he have to say about her?" She asked waiting for my answer.

"He said that she knew that he loved me and that she knew what she was getting herself into, I just don't know if her knowing will make it any easier for her. I just don't want anyone to get hurt." I said thinking of my own heartache.

I couldn’t stand the thought of someone hurting like I was right now. What if she truly loved him and then she just lost him. This almost felt like deja vu I had been in this position before and it seemed like this had to be a sign that we were not meant to be.

"Allie, I don't know what's going through you crazy brain right now, but you can't give him up again. I won't let you." She said frustrated.

"You have lost to much already and I'm not letting you lose anything else. Allie don't push me and make me have to make that girl disappear. You know me well enough to know that I'm not joking." She said walking out of the room.

I knew her well enough to know that she would do it. What was I going to do? I knew that it would be a while before I would be ready to even think about being with someone else. I loved Nick in a way that I could never put into words. I guess most people would expect for me to love Matt more but If anything I loved them with the same intensity but in different ways if that makes sense.

I loved Nick because I wanted to not because I had too, he earned all the love that I had for him. He was my rock when I needed strength my shoulder to cry on when my world was falling apart. He gave me worth when I felt worthless and unwanted. He was the father to my children, he was the man that held me when Matt broke me to pieces.

I couldn’t stop the tears that were running down my face. I missed him, and I wanted him back more than anything. I would do anything to just see him again.

Nick's P.O.V

I watched her cry and it hurt me to see her, so heart broken. It had not been my choice to leave her, but this was the path that my life was supposed to take. She was meant to be with Matthew even if she couldn’t see it. I knew that deep down she thought that if she gave Matthew a chance that it would somehow mean that she didn't love me.  Nothing was farther from the truth.

I've always known how much she loved me she proved it to me time and time again. All I wanted was for her to be happy. I leaned in close to her wishing that she could see me. I ran my hand down her face and she shivered.

"Be happy Allie." I whispered in her ear.

Matthew's P.O.V

The whole drive home I was hoping that I had not scared her off. I just needed her to know how I felt and where I stood with everything.  I picked up my phone and dialed Sophia's number.

"We need to talk, meet me at my house." I said before hanging up.

I knew that breaking things off with her would hurt her but, I knew it had to be done. If I had any chance at getting Allie to love me I had to start things off right. I knew that she would not go easily, and I regretted ever getting into a relationship and not waiting like the lady told me to do all those years ago.

I rubbed my forehead and pulled into my driveway preparing myself for what was to come.

"You’re doing the right thing daddy. Allie is who your meant to be with." Izzy said getting out of the car.

Nick's P.O.V

I stood in the corner watching Alex play with his toys and I felt so much sadness for what I knew I was going to miss with both my kids. I wouldn’t be there to cheer him on at a game or watch him graduate I felt so much grief for what I had lost before I even had it.

 My daughter would never know me I would never get to tuck her in or give her piggyback rides or do all the things that daddy's do with their little girls. Someone else would have to walk her down the aisle and give her away. She was going to need someone to take my place and give her and Alex all the love that I couldn’t. That someone was Matthew no one else would do, it had to be him. Only he would love her and my kids like I do. I just had to make her see that it was okay to move on.

Matthew's P.O.V

Izzie always acted older than her years she had a wisdom to her that was eerie at times. She understood things way better than a six-year-old should. She was a sharp girl and she rarely missed anything. She had made it clear to me that she did not like or approve of Sophia.

Izzie was a fiery child she had no problem saying what was on her mind no matter if you liked it or not. Sophia was very aware that Izzie had no love for her. Of course Mandy had always talked to her about Allie and how she was my true mate Mandy was team Allie all the way. Thinking back on the years it was weird how things turned out. Most people would think that Mandy would not care for Allie at all, but she was always trying to get me to break it off with Sophia saying that I needed to be with Allie. We had become good friends after our divorce she was a good person she was just put in a bad position early in life.

It made me feel so much better that Izzie approved of Allie she would have no problem adjusting to her being in my life. Now I had to take care of the only loose end I had left. Hopefully this went better than I thought it would.

I got out of the car and followed Izzie inside the house. It was time to do what I had to no matter what happened.

Sophia's P.O.V

I knew what he wanted to talk about and I didn't like it one bit. I knew the minute that girl's mate died that this was going to happen. I just didn't think that it would be this soon. I had to think of something to keep him from getting with her. I was meant to be Alpha female and I was going to make it happen no matter what I had to do.

I was pulled out of my thoughts as Izzie walked right by me with a smirk on her face. She acted like I was not even here. That little brat was a pain in my neck. When I ran this house her attitude was going to change.

Matt walked in the door with a frown on his face and I prepared myself for the role of my life.

"Sophia, the time has come to end what we have. As you know Allie's Mate Nick died so Allie is single again. I have to cut all ties with you before I can try to win her Love." He said sitting down.

"I'm sorry if I hurt you but I won't lose her again She is my true Mate. I hope you understand that and can move on from us." He said hugging me.

 I let the tears fall and I pulled away from him.

"I knew going into this that this would happen someday, I'm going to be okay. I won't say that it does not hurt because It does, but I'll heal." I said walking to the door.

"Are you sure you’re going to be okay." Matthew said walking up behind me.

"I'll be fine I'm a big girl I know how to move on. I hope you and she are happy together." I said smiling as I walked out the door.

I smiled the whole way to my car because I knew that this was far from over. I was not going to let him get rid of me that easy.

Matthew's P.O.V

I was relieved that Sophia had taken things so well. I was afraid that she was going to throw a fit. It really would not had mattered if she had protested my mind was made up and there was no changing that. I was thankful that things had gone as good as they did. Now that things were over with Sophia I could give winning Allie back all of my attention. My heart started beating fast at the thought of finally being with her.

I closed my eyes and remembered our one and only kiss. I had stolen it and she had not been happy about it. I wanted to feel what it felt like to hold her in my arms because she wanted to be there. Not because she was going through something and had no choice.

I wanted her to love me like I loved her. To want me as bad as I wanted her. She was mine and I was going to do whatever it took to win her love. I was not willing to lose her this time. This time I was going to fight and anyone who got in my way better be willing to die for it.

Allie's P.O.V

I drove to the pack cemetery tears falling down my face. This seemed the new norm lately. I was always so gloomy I just wanted things to go back to how they used to be. I wanted Nick back. I knew that as much as I wanted him back that he was never coming back. I just needed to make my heart understand that. I was hoping that after Ari was born that I would be less sentimental. But deep own I knew that I would probably be worse.

I pulled up to his grave site with my flowers in hand and got out. Nick was always so sweet and understanding. He always knew the right thing to say to make things better for me. I needed to talk to him even if it was me doing all the talking.

I knelt down at his grave and started talking...