CYPHER

May's matter

MAY

They had disinfected Dean's wound and wrapped it up in bandages while he had been sleeping .

Blade had decided that they watch him on shifts and made a joke of not letting their best fighter run away on them after he realized that he was always getting injured around them and they were simply too much trouble , none of them had laughed even when they realized that he was just trying to ease their emotions.

Jade had taken the first watch while May had gone off to punch everything she could punch .

She had called herself independent and self reliant yet her ass was being saved every goddamn second , it was unbecoming and embarrassing .

She was beginning to hate how this game was exposing all of her insecurities and weakness especially to someone she liked.

She looked over to Dean's sleeping form and sighed , he was here because of a girl , that much was obvious.

But was she worth it ?

Did he love her so much that he was willing to die , willing to push himself farther than even he knew ?

May had seen it when he fought , he did not know his limit or how far he could go , he just did his best while considering everything including the lives of people he had just met .

But , there was something everyone knew and was not saying .

Nobody was talking about the fact that this game was pyramid oriented , saving other people was nothing but a waste of time .

Dean groaned as he opened his eyes and May rushed over to the bed .

DEAN

Dean did not dream of anyone or anything , he was simply in an abyss of his own creation .

He had not had a rest like this since his parents died .

Did he have to beat himself to a pulp Everytime he wanted to sleep well? Dean was sad for himself .

He tried to open his eyes but his whole face stung like he had been slapped over and over again by someone with spikes for hand .

When he finally got them open , May was at his side , looking down at him unsurely .

He wanted to ask her to move her face but opening his mouth even hurt more than trying to open his eyes ,Jesus , had he been stung by bees while he slept ?

May looked over his face as if she was searching for something .

" Wait , do you not recognize me ?!!"

She sounded like it would be truly tragic if he did not , Dean rolled his eyes and tried to demonstrate that his mouth hurt but when he lifted his hand , it was covered with a thick bandage , he winced as he remembered how gory his hand had looked without the flesh on one side .

Whoever had put the bandage on him had done a terrible job , it was so heavy .

Dean pointed to his mouth and then to May , trying to communicate his predicament .

" You want to kiss me ? "

Dean scoffed , frowning deeply as he reclined deeper into the bed .

He positioned his hand and let his fingers flap about to imitate talking .

May thought for a second , her hand coming to stroke her chin .

" Oh, I get it. You can not feel your fingers anymore ".

Dean rolled his eyes in exasperation .

" Why would I not be able to feel my fingers ? I am obviously flapping them about ....ouch ".

Turns out that Dean could talk if he was frustrated enough , the pain did not matter anymore .

He sat up in bed , wondering how long he had been asleep for .

He turned to May , should he ask her ?

Asking her would take so long , he could take a bath in that time .

" You have not been out that long , about two hours now ".

Dean was so thankful that she had understood what he wanted to know without frustrating him .

He stood up and headed to the journal that he had not completed reading , he needed to see if there was any mention of the golem they had seen today .

The first thing that caught his eye was the drawing of the core that was over the table .

He picked it up and examined it , he had known from his dad's calculations that the cores had enough energy to power large houses , more power than was packed Into their bodies .

They had not been living to their full potentials so Dean had just assumed , they would become fiercer had harder to kill as the game progressed .

He had not expected such a blatant change .

But , this change told him something , someone not very far from here was tweaking autobots and sending them their way .

He say down on the chair and opened up the journal , he needed to learn all that was there to learn about the autobots .

From the corner of his eyes , he saw May sigh deeply .

He turned to her and saw just how forlorn she looked , he immediately avoided her eyes before she noticed him .

The smart thing would be to focus on the journal and leave her to whatever was eating at her .

Dean opened the journal to the page he had stopped at but the words would not align for him to read , he groaned deeply and turned to her, he might as well get it over with .

" What the f**k is wrong with you ?"

She jumped slightly , startled by his sudden yelling .

She pointed at his face and grimaced.

" Doesn't your mouth hurt anymore ? Do you feel better now? "

" Ouchhh ".

Dean touched his mouth and scowled at May , it had not hurt when he yelled at her but as soon as she pointed it out , it had begun to ache.

He pushed his chair closer to the bed and next to her , looking at her .

" What is wrong ? "

May lifted her head and smiled softly , she had taken her hair out of its ponytail and it lay around her now , making her look even more gloomy .

" I have gotten weak and reliant ".

Dean nodded , waiting for her to continue .

She did not continue and instead left Dean wondering if that was all .

Dean sighed .

" That's okay ".

It was May's turn to be surprised, she lifted her head sharply , her eyes widening as she seemed lost .

" But , I could not move today and I would have died if not for you and I have been feeling sloppy for a while , there is also the stupid fight I got myself into that I still have to attend ".

" Everything just seems so blurry and uncertain ".

Blurry and uncertain.

They were descriptions that had plagued Dean's life for a very long time .

That was why he was here , he did not want to be so uncertain about his life and what he could or could not make out of it.

" It is completely Okay . It is okay to be sloppy and stupid and uncertain, It is okay as long as you know you are giving your best and trying your hardest ".

" And you did save me just yesterday when I could not move , so ..."

May blinked and chuckled awkwardly we her eyes flitted everywhere but his face while Dean mentally face palmed , She had forgotten .

No , he was in too much pain to deal with May's short memory and the frustration that came with it.

He pushed his chair back to the table to continue his reading .

" Does this mean that the game is getting more difficult or that the Patrons all have specialized golems like we all have different weapons ? "

Dean considered her question, it was an eye opener .

He had never considered that the golems were specifically designed for Patrons but it made perfect sense .

" I was thinking that it meant that the game was getting tougher and someone was tweaking the autobots to make them harder to take down but your idea makes more sense , If the Patrons could tweak their golems, Everyone of them would bring in something that probably had wings and wheels".

May beamed at the comment , she stood up and held out Dean's gun .

" You left this outside and I filled the clips back for you ".

Dean nodded gratefully and took it out of her hands , he suddenly remembered his bow too and was about to ask if she came across it when she turned around and pointed behind her .

" If you are thinking about the bow , it is over there ".

Dean sighed , he was relieved because he had grown strangely attached to the thing .

" And Jade mentioned that he saw people with bows too at the Arena ".

Dean blinked , unsure of what he was going to do with that Information .

May clapped and rolled her eyes as she began to walk out .

" I am saying I will solve your diminishing arrow problem ".

She turned around when she reached the door and gave Dean a thumbs up .

" Now , I need to think of how to pound this Matter into dust ".

Dean blinked while May lost herself in giggling .

" Don't you get ? She is Martha and ..."

Dean cut off from further explaining the terrible joke.

" I understand what it is you are trying to say ".

She walked out , leaving Dean to his work .

Her ability to change moods needed to be studied .

For now though , Dean needed to be studying something different .