Falsely Accused

Ten

Falsely Accused

Chapter Ten.

‘’You saw who?’’ Rue asks me after we settle in her car.

‘’I know you will probably say I am a madwoman but believe me, I just saw Neal,’’ I respond calmly.

I am not worked up or anything, I am breathing and speaking normally, I have never known this side of me.

‘’You are not mad Nada, you are perfectly okay and I cannot say such a thing about you.’’ She responds in an assuring manner.

‘’Thank you.’’

‘’Any time baby girl, we need to get going or mum will screw our asses.’’ She says jokingly with a slight smile covering her lips.

‘’I wanted to ask a question though.’’

‘’I am listening sweetheart.’’

‘’Why do I keep seeing Neal?’’ I ask bluntly.

‘’Can we save the question for the therapist?’’ She says very softly and I nod. ‘’I think he will be best placed to answer your question.

Two days later, my journey with the therapist begins. Rue walks slowly with me to the parking lot. She is driving me to the hospital and I cannot be more grateful.

The doctor is in his office, he is seated behind his desk holding a pen that he keeps twirling in his fingers. He’s so calm and composed.

He could be in his mid-thirties if I am estimating correctly. He is dark, tall, and somehow huge. He has grey hair all over his head and I smile when he turns to look at me.

‘’How are you doctor?’’

‘’Nada right?’’ He calls and I nod giving him my attention. I am sipping the cold water that I got from the reception slowly and paying attention to him.

I love water and most of the time if I am not sipping my wine, I am sipping some cold or hot water.

‘’Yes doctor,’’ I respond softly.

Welcome, and please make yourself comfortable.

‘’Thank you.’’

‘’Can you tell me what brings you here?’’ he is balmy and tranquil as he asks that question.

‘’um…I wanted to see a therapist and here I am,’’ I say with a slight smile and he flashes a slight smile back.

I wonder if he will be able to read the notes he is scribbling. They look so ugly but I guess he is okay with it.

‘’Nice, here you have one. Feel free to talk stay calm and most of the time when you feel like you are getting anxious, just breath in and out and we will be good. Have you ever seen a therapist before?’’

‘’Not at all, I haven’t seen one before because I started having the challenges recently.’’

‘’Can you mention some of the challenges you want us to look into?’’

‘’First, I lost my parents, both of them in a grisly road accident. Then my boyfriend is killed and the next thing I know is me being blamed for his death. I then give birth without ever knowing that I was pregnant and my sister takes the baby away. The latest is the one where I see Neal in broad daylight and the moment I try walking towards him, he disappears.’’

He looks at me with wide eyes but he softens real quickly.

‘’How come? I mean I am wondering why your sister would take away your baby.  What does she hold against you?’’

‘’Nothing I know of because our parents just left the two of us. She is my big sister but she hates me. She pretended to be a good sister and took the baby when I was in prison. The doctor had no choice, but to hand over the baby.’’

‘’Do you have an idea why she would be hating you?’’

‘’No idea. She used to be a good girl, I know she used to care for me, I just don’t understand why she would be doing this now.’’

‘’When did she start showing this ‘hatred’ thing?’’ he uses his fingers to show the quote signs on the word hatred

‘’After Neal died, I realized that she had changed. In fact, she even testified against me.’’

He has no emotions at all and I wonder whether he is feeling my pain. His face is calm and if any feelings are there he masks them so well.

‘’How often do you meet the challenges?’’

‘’Since I got out of jail, I keep seeing Neal passing by or smiling at me. Am I okay, doctor? Am I losing my mind?’’

‘’Not really, you will be fine.’’

‘’For how long did you two know each other.’’

‘’For close to three years.’’

‘’Calm down Nada breath in, breath out, keep doing that and you will be fine.’’ I wouldn’t know how to come down, I get affected each time I speak about or remember them.

Neal, Neal junior and my parents.

I can’t just hold my tears, I know I should but I can’t. I wonder if I will ever let go of him. I am holding too much of our memories together.

‘’Maybe we should continue this tomorrow. Are you okay with that?’’

‘’Yes, I feel overwhelmed. I can’t keep talking about this. Sorry.’’ I say amid-bawls and the doctor scribbles down some more.

Rue bought me a phone so I call Rue to tell her that I am done and she says she is in the parking lot.

I am walking towards the parking lot when I bump into someone and when I look up, I am surprised to meet Jude’s face.

His mouth is wide open and his eyes are lingering over my body.

‘’Jude!’’

‘’Nada!’’

I am tempted to jump on him with a hug but I push the urge away quickly. I don’t want to be the one who is too desperate.

I am feeling too lonely and I might even do something I will regret. I awkwardly wring my nose to prevent myself from hauling insults at him.

He is crooked and has a very uncouth behaviours. He didn’t care about me then, I can’t see why he should now. I dread him.

He cheated on me and I must not act like that never happened.

I walk past him to get to the parking area but he grabs my hand. The grip is too strong and I know for a fact that he is hurting me. I try to pull my hand away but he doesn’t relent his grip.

‘’Wait I am so sorry Nada.’’

‘’About what?’’

‘’I know I f****d up but please forgive my ass.’’

‘’If you don’t let go of my hand, I will scream,’’ I say sternly but he tightens the hold.

‘’I want to hear one thing from you, only one thing.’’

‘’What would that be?’’

‘’I want to know if you are forgiving me or not.’’

‘’What’s your choice?’’

‘’Forgiveness.’’

‘’If that takes you to a peaceful sleep, you got it. Now, can I go?’’

‘’No, you can’t. Not just yet my sweetheart.’’

‘’What do you want?’’

‘’You,’’ he replies nonchalantly. I want to know why you went to jail and how you got out.’’

‘’Wow! As who?’’

‘’As Jude and please stop being nasty, it doesn’t suit you.’’

‘’Really now?’’ I ask sarcastically. ‘’I think whatever doesn’t suit me right now is your being here Jude. Make yourself busy, I don’t want to be found in, a close vicinity with you.’’ I say with authority and he smiles evilly.

I swear he doesn’t have any good motives.

‘’Nada!’’ Rue calls and that should be my cue to leave this place, I need to go home and rest. I have had enough breakdowns already and I don’t want to have more.

‘’I am coming Rue.’’

‘’Better hurry up because I will not keep waiting.’’

‘’Sure mum.’’

‘’Mum?’’ he asks surprised. ‘’I thought you lost your parents in that terrible accident?’’

He just had to remind me that and right now I am blinking randomly to prevent the welling tears from falling. I know it is normal to lose people but yeah it happened and it still pains me.

‘’None of your business Jude! Keep your silly thoughts to yourself asshole!’’ I say authoritatively and I turn to my heels and walk hastily without looking back.

‘’I see you learnt to be strong in prison.’’ I ignore his uncalled for and unethical words. I don’t need to show him that he can intimidate me. I can do without the insults also.

I am a different version by now and I take people head-on.

I fought hot mama. Something that no one ever expected me to do. I was vulnerable, weak, enfeebled, sapped and emaciated but I still managed to fight her.

I will fight anyone to protect myself.

I will never allow anyone to show me any form of intimidation.

‘’Are you okay Nada?’’

‘’Never been better Rue.’’

‘’What took you so long?’’

‘’I met this ass hole who cheated on me and wanted to intimidate me. He thinks I am any match to the person he once knew. Not at all.’’

‘’What did he want?’’

‘’He is trying to ask for forgiveness, something that doesn’t exist in my diary. Not anywhere close to my list of thoughts more so to an undeserving ass like him.’’

‘’Come on baby girl, don’t get worked up. I hope you put him in the right place.’’

‘’Trust me I did.’’

‘’That’s my small sister. Show them what you showed the hot mama.’’ She says and I forget my problems for a moment.

We hi-five and laugh like that’s the only thing that exists in our lives.

Rue is the queen of Lingala so we are singing along to the songs playing. I love this girl why lie. Just that I am a real straight woman.

When we get home Rue’s dad isn’t home yet. Her mum is busy in the kitchen and I wonder why she loves cooking so much.

She is such an organized woman and she makes me miss mum a lot.

We walk to Rue’s bedroom silently.

‘’What happened to your deadbeat boyfriend?’’ I ask her to break the awkward silence.

She shrugs dropping her shoulders.

‘’He keeps calling, asking for another chance.’’

‘’What’s the plan?’’

‘’I don’t have any.’’

‘’As if I didn’t know that already,’’ I tell her jokingly and she sticks her tongue out to me winking at the same time.

I roll my eyes at that.

‘’What don’t you know baby girl?’’

‘’I don’t know if you are forgiving that douchebag or if you have sent him to hell already.’’

‘’Your choice.’’

‘’Invalid,’’ I respond bitterly. ‘’Rue please stop being an ass right now.’’

‘’Okay, I will not forgive him.’’

‘’As you say.’’

For the first time since Rue bought me this phone, it chimes and I look at the screen surprised. I look at Rue then back to the screen and to her again.

She looks as confused as I am.

I have not given my number to anyone apart from Rue’s parents and her. Whoever is calling me must be someone who knows me very well.

I press the green button and press the sleek gadget to my right ear then listen patiently to the caller.