CHAPTER FORTY
1046 Words
He had to carry her back to the town proper though, Haneul was not a party to carry anyone again and Adrik looked like he might pass out when Ceraun was about to ask.
He did not mind, he was slightly surprised though after she had gotten on his back and he stood up.
Her cloak was back on, obscuring her features and hiding her hair, she weighed next to nothing, as light as a flower petal.
They parted ways when they got to town, everyone headed to their hut.
Ceraun trudged home, dragging his aged boots on the hard ground as he swung his arms around lazily.
He was tired and hungry but the uncertainty swirling in the pit of his stomach kept all of that at bay.
When he got home the day before, he had been eager to tell his mother about his enlistment and later on his father.
Their responses did not match his energy however.
What had he been expecting though?
He took off the piece of twine he used to hold up his hair to push a hand through the unruly, fair locks.
He had more or less told them that he had signed himself off to be killed on the battleground, that he had enlisted to be fed to the vicious magical creatures.
Did he really expect his mother to clap her hands happily and swoop him in a hug?
Or for his father to clap him proudly on the shoulder and commend him?
The house had seemed doubly gloomy after that, this morning was even worse.
His father seemed almost sick, bent over double and walking stiffly.
It was not till he had told his mother that he had finally enlisted into the army did he realize that while they never said a word against his decision, they had not really supported it.
And the hope in his mother's eyes before he cruelly crushed it was for him to tell her that he had changed his mind and chosen to live with them for as long as they had.
His mother's worry lines seemed even deeper this morning, not just for his sake but also for his father who did not seem himself at all.
He had tried to drown out all of his worries by distracting himself while training, also he had convinced himself to not dwell too much on his parent's apparent unhappiness.
Perhaps if he did not dwell on it, he would come back and find his home, the way it had always been.
But his optimism could only last for so long and now that all of his friends were gone, his worries crept upon him like shadows in the night time, taking over his thoughts.
He let himself into the clay hut, looking for his mother immediately.
He greeted her as soon as he caught sight of her, his expression apprehensive.
"Ceraun, you are back." She smiled at him and his breath left him heavily.
Relief falling over him, although he knew that his decision to join the army would be a hard blow to them, he wished they would not live the rest of the time he had to spend with them like he was already dead.
"How was your day with your friends?" Tes asked, taking out some crusty bread and cold soup for her only son to eat.
Dinner would be a better fare, at least it would be hot.
Ceraun launched into details, eager to tell her about his day.
He also noticed that they never told him how their day was at where they were made to work no matter how much he pushed to hear of it.
He then took it upon himself to fill up the silences at mealtime with stories of his day, this was before he and Adrik had begun to train, he would make up stories just to fill up the dark silence.
He was also careful, even while making up stories and telling them about his day with his friends, he was careful to not let a wrong word slip or he could be responsible for sending his entire family to the labour camps.
His relief doubled when his father came back and shared the same state of mind as his mother.
Elder Feyrer didn't look happy but at the very least, he did not look as miserable as he did in the morn.
Supper went on, as usual, Ceraun's questions about his day going unanswered or deflected and so he made a repeat of what he had told to his mother earlier.
His mother did not seem to mind that she had heard all of his tales before, she never seemed to, listening attentively although she already knew of what he would say.
His mother seemed to perk up somewhat at the mention of Auris but the light dimmed when he pointed out that she had also enlisted into the army.
The meal was scarfed down in the dim light of the evening, cooking fires going out so that the town returned to its usual morose state of perpetual darkness.
Ceraun felt like his parent's upbeat moods seemed shallow, like a wooden container, empty inside.
But he pushed those intrusive thoughts out of his mind, if they could try hard enough for him, the least he could do was appreciate their efforts.
He would also not die, contrary to what everyone kept repeating, he was sure that if he spent long enough in the army, they would let him come visit his family.
His parents could rest then because they would not have to work tirelessly to put a roof over their heads and food on the table.
They would just have to wait for him, he would make sure to come back to them.
He would fight to stay alive long enough to see their faces again and the relief and joy written on their weathered faces, it would hurt because he would have to leave a second time but getting to see them once was enough.
It would give them the hope to live on, perhaps just to see their son one more time.
He really wanted a future like this and by the Pillars, he would get it.
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