My Best Friend, My Beast

Dilemma and Broken Heart

[Nadia’s POV]

Did I say ‘Yes’? Unfortunately, I did.

“Okay,” I mumbled shakily. Derek’s lips curved into a huge grin, brightening up his face. The stormy look in his eyes was replaced by glinting happiness.

I could have… should have said no, but I was a weak woman and a selfish one. I didn’t want him to go to anyone else. A part of me was ecstatic that he thought of me even if this was going to be a fake thing.

‘You are that much available to him,’ a voice at the back of my mind leered. I pushed it back. I would muddle over these thoughts later.

I pivoted back to the present as my ears picked up claps, laughter, sound of photos being taken and then I felt a pair of arms wrapping around me.

“Thank you, Dee,” he mumbled against my ear, soft and affectionate.

I felt my eyes tear up. They weren’t happy. I knew that but not others.

After a long time, Derek was hugging me. I felt a tingling sensation of sorts course through me. As if it was a habit, I wrapped my arms around him too, hiding my face in the crook of his neck.

‘This isn’t real,’ I reminded myself.

“The breakfast is on the house then folks,” Mark said cheerily. We pulled away, Derek somehow seemed reluctant to let go, but it could as well be my hyper imagination.

“I won’t say no today,” Derek replied with equal enthusiasm.

I somehow pulled up a smile. I didn’t know how I looked, probably not great, definitely not as impeccable as Derek.

At the back of my mind, I couldn’t help but wonder if he would propose to a girl he would later fall in love with in the same way he did today. Or if he would take her to some fine restaurant where she could go dressed up and then bend down on one knee and propose.

I gulped as the thought hit me. There were no flowers and him bending down on one knee.

‘This is not real,’ a voice whispered again. Maybe I would have to repeat this sentence quite a few times before letting myself get hurt for all the wrong reasons.

~~~

“He did what?” Katie, my once colleague and now girl best friend shouted when I broke the news to her.

I nodded slowly before raising my fingers and still getting shocked at the diamond ring sitting on my ring finger. She took my hand or rather grabbed it and yanked me towards her. She ogled at the jewelry and uttered some expletive under her breath.

“This s**t is expensive like this looks organic,” she said, slightly in awe.

“A broke person like me wouldn’t even know the difference,” I mumbled as I gazed at the ring.

“Dude, it’s princess cut, and on top of that, the band is platinum. Even for a fake marriage, Derek went all the way, huh?” She shook her head, her voice unable to hide the incredulity.

She used to work with me on a part-time job, but now she has become a successful beauty influencer. Her designer bag and expensive jewelry told the tale. However, she had never become snobbish. At least not to me.

Her staying beside me was another thing that I sometimes couldn’t wrap my head around. My two best friends who were equally successful were somehow still keeping me in their orbit. Well, now one of them would be my soon-to-be husband.

“Oi, did he tell you anything else?” She quizzed, snapping her fingers in front of me, to bring me out of my thoughts. I blinked, regarding her.

“No… he offered to drop me to my place, but I declined and thankfully he received a call at that time, so I could escape,” I mumbled.

I literally had taken the subway ride back in a daze. Once I had returned I had called Katie, and without even asking why I had randomly asked her to visit, she had just rushed here.

I looked at her, pacing the length of my room. She was dressed in one of the gorgeous dresses, which basically indicated that she had left to come here mid-shoot. Her wavy blonde hair was impeccably styled in a messy bun with few curls resting on her shoulders. She had full makeup on, again for the shoot.

Mid-pace, she stopped and turned to look at me. Her grey eyes bore into mine.

“So… you have not asked him what the terms of this fake marriage would be?” She asked me.

I opened my mouth and closed it again. This time I couldn’t even defend Derek.

The thing was Katie never really liked him, stating that he seemed suspicious. This turn of events and pissed her off even more.

She threw up her hands in exasperation. “You can’t just agree to this without knowing the timeline, no? You cannot continue to pretend to be his wife forever.”

I bit my lip. In the very deep recesses of my heart, I would like nothing more. However, that was impossible. If Derek really wanted me to be his, he would never have suggested this thing.

For me, all this felt like a dream. A bad one. It was like, I had stepped into one of those dramas which I binge-watched during my college days.

Katie came to sit beside me. “Dee, you need to understand that someday you will find a man whom you love, and who loves you. If you remain tied to Derek even that time then think of what will happen. You have a life too, of your own, not the one that revolves around Derek.”

I got what she said. I did. But she didn’t know that another aspect of why I had such low self-esteem was that I had never had a boyfriend or even a potential lover. It… just never happened for some reason. I used to see other girls get flowers and chocolates on Valentine’s Day or listen to them brag about what gifts they got on their birthday from their significant others.

I would get jealous. But that envy would somewhat be soothed by Derek who would give me little trinkets and gifts now and then and would make sure to stay with me on my birthday.

But that longing remained— to go on cute dates and take pictures, or of experiencing fleeting romances in my school or college days like other people of my age.

“Say something,” she said, exasperated.

Smiling wryly, I replied, “We were at the cafe so I couldn’t ask him. I will today and ask him to drop by.”

Katie gave me a look. Folding her hands across his chest, she said, “You better. Do you want me to stay?”

I smiled, a genuine one, and shook my head. “I have got this.”

I didn’t want anybody’s intervention, not even Katie’s. I just wanted to know why Derek sought me and for how long we had to keep up this ruse. My heart clenched when I thought of this.

Katie hugged me and reminded me to be strong and stand my ground before leaving. I watched her red Audi glide out of the main gate.

Fishing out my phone from the bag, I texted Derek. [We need to talk.]

~*~