My Best Friend, My Beast

Proposal

[Nadia’s POV]

I took big gulps of breath the moment I walked into one of the stalls. The washroom wasn’t crowded, and I hoped that I hadn’t earned weird looks from the ladies outside.

My legs gave in and I sat down on the closed toilet seat. I rubbed my chest to ease the pain, even though I knew this pain was not going to go away anytime soon. I felt short of breath and wondered if I would get a panic attack. I hope I won’t.

My vision turned blurry as Derek’s words came back to my mind. Well, it hadn’t left.

The words played like a loop. I let out a choked sob as I realized how everything was shattering around me — my work, my life… my best friend. Nothing was right at the moment. The only person who kept me sane was also going to go away.

‘So? Did you expect him to stay with you forever?’ A voice at the back of my mind sneered.

Did I?… A very selfish part of me answered in the affirmative.

I wiped away the tears but they wouldn’t stop so I buried my face in my palms and cried.

It might look like a serious issue from a stranger’s point of view. The way I was so dependent on Derek was dangerous for both of us. I was hopeless yet practical so I had never not considered this development in Derek’s life.

Fact 1: he was a billionaire with generational wealth

Fact 2: I didn’t know a lot about his life because even after 10 years of friendship, I had no clue what his parents looked like.

Fact 3: I was almost broke. My Aunt had very little to give. I sometimes wondered why he was even stuck with me.

Fact 4: I—

My fact-check and self-pity was rudely cut short when I heard a loud knock on the door.

“If you don’t come out in 5 seconds, your lover boy is going to break down this door,” Lana warned, not unkindly. How did she even know I was inside this stall?

I let out a groan. Why? Why was he like this? It was because of this that I…

“I will be out in a second,” I said, hoping my voice didn’t quiver.

“You better. Or you will be paying for the broken door,” she said. I heard Lana’s receding footsteps and let out a shuddering breath.

I fished out my compact and looked at my reflection. My face would tell him right away that the girl problem wasn’t a girl problem after all. It wouldn’t take him long to figure out why I was crying.

‘I am screwed.’ I lamented inwardly. I looked at my phone only to find several missed calls from him but somehow the device had gone into silent mode. The heck?

I left the stall and splashed water on my face. My eyes were rimmed red, and swollen slightly. I wiped my face with the tissues available to dry hands, before leaving the washroom.

My heart stuttered when I saw Derek tapping his brown loafer-clad foot impatiently as he scrolled through the phone. His jaw was clenched and that wasn’t a good sign. I gulped fearfully before my gaze met Lana who was wiping the counter.

She gave me a pitying look. I need that.

I took a deep breath and, pasting a small smile, walked up to him. “Sorry I was—”

The words died down my throat when he lifted his gaze. The stormy look in those cerulean eyes wasn’t something I was expecting.

“Sit,” he said, and oddly I felt some kind of authority in that tone. I complied.

The cafe had become quieter now, with mostly late office goers having their breakfast or coffee in a rush.

I fidgeted with my bag on my lap as he remained silent for a while.

“Why don’t you listen to me and jump to conclusions?” He began. My stomach dropped. Did he figure it out?

“Do you think that if I find someone, I will abandon you?” He asked quietly but made sure I heard each word.

I gulped, feeling shame fill my heart. I lowered my gaze.

I heard him let out a deep sigh. That sigh hurt more than a long lecture from him.

“I… I am not myself these days,” I mumbled. It was partially true.

“Like what? Avoiding me? Keeping me from visiting you? Or visiting me at my office? Do you think I am blind to not notice all this? Or do you think that I am heartless enough to overlook all this?” He quizzed, his tone icy.

I blinked furiously to ward off the tears. I clenched my hands into fists as I struggled to answer him.

“I had been waiting for you to open up to me,” he murmured when I remained silent.

“I would never…” he went to add but trailed off. I glanced at him to find him moving his palm across his face. My heart clenched to see him like this, so… helpless because he didn’t know how to react to my behavior.

“What did you have to say?” I asked quietly, my voice quivered. “I will listen without running away like before.”

I wanted to run away… from him… for now, so that I could have some time to myself to wallow in guilt and grief. However, not letting him even say what he wanted to would be selfish of me. Even if that news would break my heart into pieces.

“Marry me?” He asked.

My head snapped up. My eyes widened. What the heck was he saying? However, his gaze was somber, there was no hint of a smile on his lips.

‘He is being serious,’ I thought incredulously.

“Where did this…” I forgot to form a proper sentence with that suggestion of his.

“This is what I wanted to tell you, dimwit,” he muttered, but affectionately.

“And you just went on thinking wild and impossible thoughts,” he continued, shaking his head while I stared at him like he had grown three heads.

“You are stuck with me in this life Nadia Jones,” he said with a soft smile.

I averted my gaze, flustered and slightly dazed. It was then that I realized that people were watching. Well, some were. Mostly girls who looked envious.

“Look at me,” Derek said, slightly exasperated and petulant.

I swiveled my attention towards him. He was frowning or rather subtly pouting. My heart did that back flip which had been an instant reaction ever since I met him.

“Why?” I croaked, still not grasping the concept. True his parents wanted him to get married, and in that case, I had thought that they must have even found a girl for him. In wealthy families like theirs, marriages were usually arranged, right? Or were those dramas that I binge-watched at times showing fake scenarios?

“Because…I…” he remained silent, while my heartbeat notched up. I didn’t want to get my hopes up.

But what about my traitorous heart? It would always want more.

“Why?” I repeated this time my tone slightly demanding. “You could get anyone.” The words made my mouth bitter.

He looked me in the eye. His gaze was piercing. “I know, but I do not want to. I…I don’t want to settle down yet.”

Oh…

My heart broke a little. This was what I was fearing.

He didn’t want to marry me because he loved me. How did I get ahead of myself despite trying to remind myself that he couldn’t…wouldn’t love or even think of me as his potential lover?

I was just a substitute. Until he found THE ONE.

I swallowed the disappointment and ignored the way my heart clenched painfully.

“Marry me?” Derek asked again, oblivious to my suffering, and swiftly held up a jewelry box showcasing a diamond ring. He looked at me hopefully, as my gaze widened at the beautiful ring sitting proudly in the cushioned box.

I distantly heard murmurs of excitement, someone even squealed and cooed. My ears were burning.

“Wha—” I couldn't even finish my question as he took my hand and slid the ring onto my ring finger.

I looked at my finger which now adorned the ring. It fit snugly! The b*st*rd had this planned!