Forbidden But Bound

The End And The Beginning

Julia got back to her hotel room after a long walk along the pebble path. She opened her room door and walked into her dimmed-lit room. What was she meant to feel about all that just happened? Her emotions were mirrored by the constant smile she had. She felt warm and excited something she hadn’t felt in a while. Julia held on to his suit jacket remembering how it felt to hold him close to her. She remembered the sound of his heart beating and the movement of his chest with his every breath. She missed him, she yearned for him.

She decided to take a late-night shower to wash off all the saltiness from both the sea breeze and the humidity. 

She turned the music on her phone to auto-play. Calum Scot came on. Playing music while she had a shower was something that she did all her life. It always put her in a relaxed mood. The housekeeping turn-down service had come through that evening while she was at the party and they dimmed the lights and lit some scented candles and placed some Frangipanis around the bathroom. Her bed cover was neatly turned and the pillows fluffed. They had placed a small bouquet of lavender flowers on the pillow. It instantly made her feel at peace.

Julia had never seen a bathroom like the one at the hotel the party guests were booked in for the few days of the wedding. The bathroom was made up of light brownstone and opened out onto the balcony overlooking the ocean. Julia was so happy to have booked herself into the suite. She wanted to spoil herself after all that happened with Thomas. Before she undressed she let the shower run a little. In the meantime Julia undid her dress and let it slip off onto the bathroom floor, she tied her hair up and got into the misted shower. The water jetted out of the shower from the high-powered shower head massaging her body with every touch. She turned her bare back towards the shower and closed her eyes. There he was standing in the shower with her. The water dripping from his pink lips as he looked into her eyes. His hands holding her close as he moved to kiss her neck. Her imagination drove her crazy. She smelt him, felt him, and could feel him. She held her hand out to stop herself from falling over, leaving a handprint on the misted shower door. He raised her against the glass, “ Why did you leave me, James?” Julia whispered into his ear. Just then she heard her phone chimed from her clutch bag. She was jolted out of her fantasy. 

“Who could be messaging me at this time of the night?” She rolled her eyes and grunted as she hopped out of the shower, quickly wrapped a bath towel around her, and grabbed her cellphone.

“I miss you, Julia. Maybe when you get back we could sit down and sort out our issues. I hope you are having a great time at the wedding. I love you.”

That burst her little dream bubble.

“Thomas,” she said looking at her phone. 

Julia stared at her phone as the water dripped on the floor from her wet body. She pressed the home screen button on her phone and jumped back into the shower. The mood had completely changed. That had been such an anti-c****x. She quickly had her shower, and did her night skin routine, and got into bed. 

Julia loved Thomas. She knew that he was the kind of guy that she can spend the rest of her life with. But she could never really trust him fully again. There will be a lack of trust between them. But she knew that she would forgive him if he could just admit that he was wrong. The battle between James and Thomas went on in her head for a few minutes before she fell off to sleep. 

                                                                                                §

James walked up to his hotel room on cloud nine. 

“What was her room number again?” He asked himself. 

“I need to go over there. I have to, I need to or I will regret it for the rest of my life.” He decided that he would just pop into his room to freshen up and head over to Julias’s room. 

“There was deep s****l tension between us I am sure she felt it too,” James said as he put his key card into the slot he thought, “Wow, she is so damn beautiful.”

The door unlocked and he pushed it open. James didn’t notice her immediately. There she was, Stacy. She was sitting in the dark on the armchair in the corner of the room. 

“I have been waiting all night for you,” she said in a very monotone, unimpressed voice. 

James was startled. He flipped the light switch on. 

“What the flying...jeez Stacy! What the hell are you doing sitting like that in the dark you gave me such a f*****g fright!” He said emptying his trouser pockets onto the hotel desk next to the Nespresso Machine and sat at the edge of the bed.

“James, we need to talk,” she said as she moved from the armchair to the bed closer to where he was seated. 

James had a feeling he knew what she wanted to discuss with him, eyeing the packed suitcase and coat not far from the door. He looked at her seeing the seriousness on her face she sat down beside her close enough that their legs touched. 

“What’s up?” He said looking at her.

“ I thought you would have at least called me to see where I was all this time. Instead, you have been gone for hours,” she began crossing her arms and legs. 

“Oh I’m sorry I was...” he tried to give her an explanation or more like an excuse.

“Stop James, Don’t even bother I am not interested,” she admitted pushing his hand away from her shoulder.

“I think we are done here. s*x is good but I am looking for someone who takes this seriously and sees a future with me. We are engaged to be married for god-sakes James!” Her tone of voice slightly increased as she mentioned their engagement. 

“Yet I feel that we are not at all in the right position to take that big step. Do you even love me, James? I actually do not think you have an ounce of love for me. I was hoping that I would find the love of my life and we would love each other and live the rest of our life together but you are not him. I am just looking for more out of a relationship or marriage. More than s*x and expensive restaurants. But I guess we both saw this coming. ”

James didn’t have anything to say. He went mute. Disagreeing with her would be a lie. For a few months now he felt a huge disconnection from Stacy. He knew that he had loved her and wanted to marry her. But he realized later into the engagement that the idea of finding the perfect mate had forced him into proposing to her before he realized that she was not the love match that he was looking for. Too often in the wolf pack, they would just look for the ideal mate but James felt that he wanted to find the love of his life and he just didn’t see Stacy as being the one. He had not caught up the courage to break the engagement off himself although he had thought of it time and time again. He was worried about how this would affect the relationship between her father and the rest of his family. But hearing her utter the words herself gave him a huge sign of relief. 

She got up and grabbed her trench coat and suitcase.

James looked at his watch. It was 2:30 am. 

“But Stacy where are you going at this time. You can stay here I will get another room. You don’t have to leave. I really do not mind.” He jumped up from the bed and moved towards her.

“My dad sent his plane to get me, I am headed to the airport. ” she opened the door. 

He had nothing to say. For once he had absolutely no words that would help the current situation. 

“See you around James,” Stacy tiptoed and kissed his cheek and handed him the diamond engagement ring. She walked out of the hotel and shut the door behind her. She did not even turn around to look at James who was standing in the middle of the room like a statue, with a blank look on his face. 

“What the hell just happened, did she just break up with me?” James said scratching his head with one hand while holding the ring with the other. He sat back onto the bed and stared at himself in the mirror facing him. He couldn’t find a reason to be disappointed with what had just happened with Stacy. She was right they had seen this coming for a long time. But he was not expecting her to do it at a wedding, the timing was a little off.  

He untucked his white shirt and begun to undo his buttons from his collar. 

It was at that moment he remembered he had given Julia his tux jacket. 

“Julia,” he thought slightly smirking at the corner of his mouth. He put the ring deep in his pants pocket.

“It is too late to head over to her room,” he thought to himself. 

“Calm down James!” He scrolled himself.

“...you just went through a breakup. This is very insensitive.” 

But this made it evident that James and Stacy truly had been over for a while and seeing Julia also confirm in his mind that maybe he had found the love of his life many years ago and had to let her go. But he knew that they couldn’t be together and that there was no point giving himself false hope. James couldn’t let this chance of being with her one last time slip through his fingers. Although, the thought that she did not feel the same way did cross his mind. She did have a boyfriend. However, he was sure he felt the chemistry between them that night and he had a gut feeling that she did want him as much as he wanted her. 

“Agh! It’s almost morning,” he thought looking at his watch. But that didn’t stop him from thinking about going over to her room. 

All those years that had gone by his memory of her was pretty accurate but seeing her that night confirmed that she was more exquisite than he could have ever imagined. Back then they were young, innocent. But Julia had grown into a beautiful woman. The perfect woman. The thought of her being a stone throw away made all the blood rush through his body. He craved her touch. James allowed himself to linger in the memory of her beauty. Just then, James came up with a brilliant idea to surprise her the following morning with a special breakfast delivery. He jumped across the bed like a teenager and grabbed the hotel phone from the nightstand.

“ Good morning! Sorry to call at this time of the morning but I would like to place an order for a special room service delivery later this morning at around 8: 30am or 9:00 am if that is possible to do,” James spoke to the waiter in charge of room service and gave him a detailed description of what he wanted. 

“Yes, and don’t forget the champagne. Perfect!! Thank you very much you can put this all on my room please, I will clear the bill when I check out later today. And don’t forget to tell whoever is delivering the breakfast that they should call me once they have delivered it. Thank you very much. Good night!” James chuckled at his dry joke.

He leaned back into the bed. The soft bed was calling his name. It was the early hours of the morning, sleep hit him all at once as he lay on the edge of the bed. His eyes began to slowly close as sleep fell upon him. Too lazy to change or shower he removed his black pants and shirt, brushed his teeth, and crawled under the blankets in his briefs. He gave one last thought of Julia’s amazing smile.

“I have to see her again,” and slipped into dreamland.