The Driver

CHAPTER 19

A few months ago, while lying on the hospital bed, I did not think I would be alive today, let alone prepare to have a baby and be engaged to an angel. But here I am.

        Here we are, me and Izabela, facing the world... in a different way. Things did not go very well as we planned, but we must keep in mind that this does not happen very often. And even if we could, we would not want to change them.

        I heard the water from the shower stop and, seconds later, a loud bang vibrating through the wall. I jumped out of my chair, dropping the remote on the floor while I was running towards the bathroom. The corner of the coffee table pokes me damn hard in the shin of my foot when I run past it. I opened the bathroom door.

-       What is going on?

        Izabela shakes her head towards me and smiles as she bends down to pick up the hairdryer next to the toilet, where it had fallen.  I breathed relieved.

-       You are more paranoid than I am.

        She laughs. She put the hairdryer back on the table, she came towards me and kiss me on the corner of my mouth.

-       Looks like I am not the one who must make sure she does not get hurt.

        She says with a smile. I grab her by the shoulders and pull her closer to me, then put one hand down to touch her belly. I do not really say she is pregnant. Five months into pregnancy, I thought she was going to look like a little hippo, but what do I know about that kind of thing?

-       Maybe it is, I said, trying to hide the redness in my cheeks. You must have done this on purpose, so you can see how fast I get here.

        She kisses the other corner of my mouth, and then she gives me the death blow, kissing me for good while she sticks her wet, naked body to me. I pull out a moan while I hug her. But I am retreating before I fall into her dishonest trap.

        I hope she will be just as horny as now throughout her pregnancy. I have heard horror stories that some women want s*x non-stop, until they get big, and then, if you touch them, they turn into witch-spitting flames.

        She is always worried that the tumor will relapse. I think she is more worried than I am. If it happens, it will happen and that's it. We will get through this together. We will always go through anything together.

        As a result of the accident I found out that I had a brain tumor and that I would not have lived much longer. My chance at life was that accident.

        If I had found out about it before the accident, I would probably have resigned myself and waited for death to come and take my hand and take me into the clutches of darkness. But now I had reason to fight her, to tell her to wait.

-       Honey, we must go, I am yelling from the living room.

        She comes out of the bedroom wearing a pair of tight jeans and an equally tight T-shirt. And shoes with heels.

-       Really? With heels? You are going to deform our little girl head, I said.

-       No, I am not going to deform our little girl's head or our little boy's head.

        She contradicts me as she grabs her purse from the couch and puts it on her shoulder.

-       You are very sure of yourself, but we will see.

        She takes my hand and we leave the house, blocking the doorknob when I slam the door behind us.

-       I know for sure it is a girl, I say confident.

-       You want to bet?

        She looks at me and smiles to me. We walk into the gentle November air and open the door of the car, waving at her, palm up, to enter.

-       What kind of bet? I asked. You know I am crazy about betting.

        Izabela sneaks in the chair, and I run to the other side and climb in the car. Leaning my hands on the steering wheel, I turn my head towards her and wait. She smiles at me and, for a moment, gently bites her bottom lip. Her long black hair descends on her shoulders, and her blue eyes glow with delight.

-       You are the one who seems so sure, she says in the end.

-       Therefore, you propose the bet, and I accept it or refuse it...

        She suddenly stops and raises her finger towards me:

-       No s*x! I think you are doing pretty good on that. Think of something else...

        I wave out my hand in front of her.

-       … I do not know…

-       A bold thing or something to be meaningful.

        I am at a standstill. I put the key in the ignition, but I do not twist it.

-       Okay, if it is a girl, then I will name her, I said with a gentle, proud smile.

        Her eyebrows contract slightly and lift her chin.

-       I do not like the bet. This is something we should both contribute to, don't you think?

-       Yes, okay, but you do not trust me?

         She is swaying.

-       Yes, I do... I trust you, but...

-       ... but not as far as the child's name is concerned. I raise my eyebrow at her, but I do it as a joke.

        She cannot look me in the eye anymore and she looks like she is not comfortable.

-       Well? I urge her.

        Izabela crosses her arms and says:

-       What name did you think, exactly?

-       What makes you think I have already picked one? I twist the key in contact, and the Maserati starts spinning. She smiles at me arrogantly, tilting her head to one side.

-       Oh, will you let me? You have obviously picked one already, otherwise you would not be so sure she is a girl and you would not bet on me when we are supposed to get to the ultrasound.

       Laughing, I turn my eyes and put the gear shift in reverse.

-       Amanda, I said, and I can barely catch a glimpse of Izabela's eyes as we go out of the parking lot.

-       To be honest, I like it, she says, and her smile gets bigger and bigger. I admit, I was a little worried. Why Amanda?

-       No special reason. I just like it.

        She does not seem too convinced. She is staring at me, as a joke.

-       I am serious! I say it laughing. I have been thinking about the baby's name ever since you told me.

         Izabela's smile warms up, and if I were not a man, I would have allowed myself to blush like a fool.

-       All this time, you have been thinking about baby names.

        She seems surprised and happy. Okay, I am blushing anyway.

-       Yes, I admitted in the end. I still do not have a good name if it is a boy, but we have got a few months left.

        Izabela simply looks at me, laughing. I do not know what is going through her mind, but I do realize that my face is getting more and more blushing as she looks at me that way.

-       What is it? I asked with a laugh. She leans over the chair and raises her hand, her fingers turning my chin to one side. And then she kisses me.

-       God, I love you! She whispers.

        It takes me a second to realize that my smile is so big, I can feel the skin on my face that is extremely taut.

-       I love you, too. Now, put your seatbelt on, I said, pointing at her.

        I sat back in the chair and insert her support belt. As we head to the doctor's office, we kept looking at the clock from the board. Eight more minutes. Five. Three. I think when we walk into the building parking lot, the thought hits us both just as hard.

        Soon we will meet our son or daughter for the first time. Yes, a few months ago I did not think I would be alive...

-       Waiting kills, me, whispers Izabela, leaning towards me.

-       It is so weird. Sitting in this waiting room, surrounded by pregnant women.

        I am kind of afraid to look them in the eye. Some of them have an angry look. Looks like all the men's magazines have a guy on their cover in a boat, holding a fish, thumb stuck in his mouth. I am pretending to read an article.

-       We have only been here ten minutes, whispering to her and slapping my hand over her thigh, leaving the magazine on my lap.

-       I know, but I am nervous.

       Just as I take her hand, a nurse in a pink uniform comes out from a side door and calls Izabela's name. So we get up and follow her. I lean against the wall while Izabela undresses and puts on a hospital gown.

        I tease her that her ass is visible, and she pretends to be offended, but the redness in her cheeks betrays her. We sit down and wait. And we were waiting a while, until another nurse comes in and takes care of us. She washes her hands at the nearest sink.

-       Did you drink enough water an hour before your appointment?

        Asked the nurse after we say hello.

-       Yes, ma'am, she said Izabela.

        I realize she was afraid there might be something wrong with the baby and the ultrasound will show that. I tried to tell her everything was going to be okay, but that does not calm her down at all.

        She looks at me from the other end of the room and I get up and went next to her.

        I help her, where I can, to answer to questions, because Izabela seems more and more worried with every second that passes, and she does not talk much. I am shaking her hand, trying to calm her down. After the nurse lays that gelatinous thing on her belly, Izabela takes a deep breath.

        The nurse starts moving the probe through the gel, showing us the baby's head and elbow, and other parts. I feel the grip of Izabela on my hand begin to weaken when the nurse speaks and smiles while explaining that everything looks good. I see Izabela's face moving from agitation and clenching to relief and happiness, and that makes me smile.

-       So, you are sure there is nothing to worry about? asks Izabela. Are you extremely sure?

        The nurse agrees and gives me a look.

-       I do not see any concerns currently. It is developing properly. Movements and heartbeats are normal. I think you can relax.

        Izabela looks at me and I have a hunch we are thinking at the same thing. She confirms it when the nurse says:

-       So, you are curious about the s*x of the baby? Izabela and I do not say anything, we just look at each other. She is so beautiful. I cannot believe she is mine. I cannot believe she is pregnant with my baby.

-       I accept the bet, says Izabela finally, taking me by surprise.

        She smiles at me serenely and pulls my hand, and we turn to the nurse.

-       Yes, Izabela answers. If it is possible now.

         The nurse moves the probe back to a specific area and appears to be double-checking it before making the announcement.

-       Well, it is a little early, but... for now I think she is a little girl, she says it later. On the next ultrasound, we will be able to officially determine the s*x of the baby.

-       I won the bet, I told Izabela.

        She gave me an angry look and started getting dressed. I was very happy to have a baby, but especially since I would have a little girl who would look like her mother. Her mother's beauty had to be carried on and only a little girl could do that.

        I had no problem being a boy, but girls have a special place in the fathers' hearts. I had to plan our wedding urgently.

        After the accident I had and especially the discovery of a tumor that could occur whenever, I had to make sure that my family would have everything necessary if I were no longer in their lives. I am going to surprise Izabela and prepare whatever is needed for the wedding.

        I know she does not want something fancy and she does not want to have many guests. I am not interested in these details either, so I am going to organize something intimate and unforgettable.  I have been given another chance at life and I am not going to miss another day.

        I am happy because Izabela has given up her promise and I will make her happy every day. After we finished at the doctor we went to the mall and bought clothes for our baby. We walked into every store and bought all the clothing that Izabela chose.

        All the people looked at us with admiration and some even with envy because we radiated happiness. I could not define in words everything I felt in those moments and in what followed. I do not think there is a specific definition of happiness and love. Both together produce feelings that makes me euphoric.