Good Night Sweetheart

Small Moments

I was right in my suggestion, and soon she has music playing on her phone helping me unpack all the books and looking at me smiling when she comes across some of her favorites. I do tell her that some of the older volumes I picked up on my travels, I omit the part that they were new at the time.

I took the opportunity to throw her clothes in the washer for her. However, I don't think she noticed she had started reading Robert Browning, and I lost most of her attention. I can't compete with poetry. I make a note of that, smiling to myself, returning to the room.

"If I can steal you away from Mr. Browning, you should have some lunch." Leaning on the door frame to watch her smile as she sits on the floor, reading is heavenly, but I don’t think she would stop to eat anytime soon. She looks up, checking the time on her phone, making a cute face at it, realizing she has lost track of time.

"Oh, I'm sorry." She gasps, sliding the book onto the shelf.

"Don't be. You can read all of them as much as you would like. I just thought you might be hungry. Your clothes are dry. Would you like to go and get some lunch with me? I would make you something, but I don't have any groceries at the moment, and I don't know what you would want." I tilt my head waiting for her reply, and she looks lost in thought.

"What's on your mind?" I ask, walking over to her and sitting with her.

"I just don't want to be a bother, and I feel like I'm in the way. I have taken up so much of your time as it is, and you have been so nice about it." She speaking with her eyes cast down and looking so unsure of herself. Part of me wants to tell her everything and everything she is to me, while the other part of me screams to never tell her. She's safer not knowing, just having her here is dangerous for her. I have to keep her safe from my family, and if she leaves now and they find her and what she means to me. I am trying to think what they will do.

"I told you already anything you want is fine with me. I'm happy to have you here as long as you like." Forever works for me, I mentally add.

"Why are you being so nice to me. We hardly know each other." She mutters, and her heart speeds up when she looks at me. She has to feel it, too. The more I'm with her, the more I'm sure she can feel at least some of what I feel.

"I don't know what it is, but from the moment I met you, I wanted to know you. I still want to know you. please let me." I whisper, leaning in and brushing the hair from her face daring to get a little closer to her as she bites her lip.

"I would like that, and I want to know you too." She breathes the words so softly, so sweetly, all of my resolve is fading fast until the only thing left is my impulse and desire to kiss her only once. I only need one kiss, knowing full well all of me is hers to do with as she likes. She could grind me to dust, and I would let her.

Leaning in and using my thumb to free that poor bottom lip of hers, I want to take her and feel her in my arms. She lets out a small breath like a hum letting me pull her lips to mine. I was right. They are as soft and as sweet as I had imagined and dreamed about. Kissing her softly and savoring this moment, feeling the rush of warmth and life. I'm lost forever and only hers.

When her lips part from mine, she makes the same soft hum, her eyes closed as I move back only a breath away. "Come on, Sweetheart, let's get you some lunch." Eating is the last thing on my mind, but I know I need to move slowly; I have all the time in the world anyway. Looking into her star-filled eyes, the soft smile on her lips, and the pink flush of her cheeks. I'm hers. I can only pray to any god that will hear me that she wants to be mine.

After she changes and I take more deep breaths than I ever have in my life, we get in the car heading to town. She looks over at me, blushing now and then, making me wonder what she is thinking.

"Could we go to my apartment?" she's looking out the window, not looking at me, and I fear the worst is she rethinking things? Did I scare her off? She seemed to enjoy the kiss as much as I did, but is she doubting it now? I must have been silent for too long because she looks over at me, reading my face and smiling.

"I need to get a few things." She giggles a little as I relax a moment. "I don't know what it is, but being with you feels right." Whispering the words, unsure of how they might sound and like I may not understand, but I do completely. She feels like home, and for the first time in such a long time, I found the one thing that feels like home to me. How am I ever going to part with that?

Pulling up to her apartment, she hesitates to look around, and I know she's looking for him. I know he won't bother anyone again, but she doesn't.

"Hey, it's okay. I promise you," assuring her as best as I can.

"How do you know that?" She stares back at me, and I know she's reading me again. She is hard to keep things from.

"I just know. How about I go with you?" covering my a*s with a smile. I'm not lying to her. I promise myself to tell her everything when she's ready to hear it. I will have to, but today isn't that day. She gives me a weak smile but nods, relieving my fear of being scrutinized under her gaze.

Unlocking her door, she looks at me, "it's not much, but it's mine." She smiles, but I can hear her heart rate rise. She opens the door, and I'm honestly impressed; she has managed to make a warm and inviting space. From everything I gathered in our conversations, she doesn't talk about her parents a lot and she has no other family. She mentioned once, her mother lives a free-spirited lifestyle and was never in one place too long. Libby mentioned moving around a lot as a child, even camping for the entire summer, always in a new town every week that summer. Her mother told her it was good to see new places, but Libby looked sad as she talked.

"I'll only be a minute or two." She glances over her shoulder at me, and when she goes in the little bathroom, I snoop around only a little, looking in her cupboards and fridge to get an idea of what she might like to eat. To my shock, there isn't any food other than an apple and expired milk. She is clearly having a hard time making ends meet. The stack of mail on the table doesn't go unnoticed either. I know I shouldn't butt into her affairs, but I have to do something, seeing that she is struggling and knowing I can do something to help.

Hearing her leaving the bathroom before the door opens, I lean against the wall crossing my arms and looking at the stack of books next to the small bookshelf. She busies herself, getting her clothes.

"Hey, I just thought of something. Did you happen to see my backpack?" She tilts her head, looking at me from the dresser she's rummaging in.

"I did, and it's in the trunk of my car." The wave of relief on her face makes me smile.

"Well, I think I'm ready." She smiles. "You sure I won’t be in the way staying with you?" She looks down and fidgets with her fingernails.

I walk across the small room and tilt her face up to look at me, leaning in, "Very sure Sweetheart. You can ask a million times, and the answer won't change."