Tempted By Her Husband Twin

5.

Lana

“You really should invite him to dinner,” I remembered Raina’s words as I walked towards the kids' room to wake them up. It was my day off at the restaurant, and I was taking them to their grandmother’s place.

Mom would be delighted to see them, as always, and I was sure she was already getting breakfast started as we speak. Whenever I told her we were coming, she always insisted on our getting there early enough to feed us.

Back to my thought, I wasn’t sure I was going to take her advice, at least, not before I had spoken to my Mom. I still haven’t talked to her but I was going to have to do that when we get there.

Pushing the thoughts to the back of my mind, I opened the door of the kids’ room. “Why are you both still sleeping? It’s morning already. Or maybe you both are just pretending to be asleep.” I said, seeing Rory squeeze his eyes shut from the corner of my eye, as he tried to keep his giggling to himself.

Rory’s little giggle broke the quiet morning, and I could hear Riley’s sleepy groan as well, as he rolled over, clutching his blanket.

“I’m not pretending,” Riley mumbled, his eyes still closed. “Five more minutes, Mama.” he always wants to sleep more, that boy. I shook my head as I looked at him.

“Five minutes will turn into an hour,” I said, walking over and pulling the blanket down from his face. “Up, both of you. We’re going to Grandma’s today, remember?” And the last thing I wanted was getting them there late, because that woman wouldn't let me hear the last of it.

Thankfully, that got their attention. Rory sat up instantly, hair sticking up in every direction, causing me to almost laugh out loud, but knowing he was going to whine about it for the whole of next week made me stop myself.

“Can we have pancakes?” he asked me, giving me his incredible “you can't say no to me” grin, but I shook my head, disappointing him.

“You’ll have whatever Grandma makes,” I said, smiling despite myself. “Now go brush your teeth before I change my mind.”

They scrambled out of bed, bumping into each other on their way to the bathroom. I stood there for a moment, watching them; the same way I had done every morning since Logan died, while they were still babies, still half expecting to hear his voice behind me. I’ve got them, Lana. Go back to bed.

But it was only me now.

I sighed and turned toward the hallway, catching sight of the photo album Rory had shown Landon that day. I hadn’t been able to look at it after he left. The way Landon’s face had gone pale when he saw Logan’s pictures; it had hit something in me I hadn’t prepared for. Grief, yes, but something else too. Something I didn’t want to name.

He looked too much like him, too much like the man I lost, and it was killing me, but I couldn't blame him for that, or stop him from coming around because of it. It wouldn't be fair to him at all.

It was after all, my feelings, so I was going to have to sort it.

I ran a hand through my hair and muttered under my breath, “Raina and her ideas…” I finally went back to thinking about that.

Dinner? With him? What would that even look like? Sitting across the table from Logan’s brother… from his twin, pretending I didn’t see every feature I used to love on my late husband? Pretending it didn’t make my heart ache in the most confusing way possible?

No. Not yet.

An hour later, I was loading the boys into the car, their backpacks filled with snacks and coloring books. The morning air was crisp, sunlight peeking through the trees, and for a moment I let myself breathe. The road to Mom’s house wound through quiet streets; the kind of calm that always reminded me of home, of safety.

As we went, I turned up the radio a bit, leaving it just on the station I had left it since Logan’s death. It was his best station, so it became mine too since he died, even though I always argued with him about it while he was alive.

By the time I pulled up at the house,

Mom was already waiting at the front door of her house, waving a dishtowel in one hand, the smell of fresh biscuits floating out of the kitchen.

That woman sure was dramatic. Why did she have a dish towel in hand when she could have dropped it on the kitchen counter on her way out?

I shook my head with a smile.

“There are my boys!” she called, her face lighting up as the twins raced to her. “And there’s my beautiful daughter who never calls unless she’s bringing over my grandkids.” she said.

Right, drama queen. I thought as I looked behind me at the boys. We got down and they ran to her immediately, getting all mushy with one another.

I smiled, shaking my head as I followed them inside. “Good morning to you too, Mom.”

She gave me a knowing look, one that had always made me feel about ten years old again. “You’ve got that look on your face. The same one you used to have in high school when you were hiding something.”

How did she… Oh right, mothers knows everything.

“I’m not hiding anything,” I said quickly, which was, of course, a lie.

Mom arched an eyebrow, clearly not buying it. “Uh-huh. Sit down and tell me what’s going on before I pour the orange juice over your head.”

Threats. My mother always thought that threats would get her her way, well, sometimes it does.

“We just got here, Mom. I'll tell you all about it later.” I said.

She shook her head. “I want to know if something is bothering you right now. You're my child, no matter how grown you are.” she said.

I sighed, sitting down at the table. “It’s about Logan.”

That made her freeze for a second, her hand tightening around the coffee pot. “What about him?” she asked, acting normal. I would say that my mother was very upset when Logan died because she loved him. Or at least, how he treated me.

I hesitated, then said quietly, “It’s his brother. His twin. He’s here, Mom.”

She slowly set the pot down, her expression unreadable. “His what?” she asked, looking at me surprised.

“Well, Ma, that's exactly how I felt too. I wanted to say, but didn't.”

“His twin brother,” I repeated. “Landon. I met him at the restaurant a few days ago. He didn’t know about me. Or the boys. Or that Logan was gone.”

Mom sank into the chair across from me, blinking. “Good Lord.”

“Yeah,” I said softly. “I didn’t believe it either. But he’s real. And he looks…” I exhaled shakily, rubbing my hands together as I glanced at Rory and Riley who were now on the living room floor, dragging around their toys. “He looks exactly like him. And I don’t know how to handle that.”

For a long moment, she didn’t say anything. Then, in that quiet, steady tone only my mother could manage, she said, “Maybe you don’t have to handle it yet. Maybe you just… take it one morning at a time.”

I half expected her to ask me a lot of questions, but no, she was already trying to reassure me. Mothers, huh.

I nodded, but my chest still felt heavy. Because as much as I wanted to believe that, I couldn’t stop thinking about the way Landon had looked at the kids. Like they were pieces of something he had been missing his whole life.

Well, I knew he was probably seeing his brother in them, and that would hurt him as hell.