The Monster's Feelings
1397 Words
Rion’s POV
His eyes twitched with a certain dark amusement that I’ve become familiar with. He took one look at me…blood smeared across my nose, swaying like a drunk…and exhaled like he was exhausted.
“Rion, what the hell? You face-planted like a sack of bricks. Did you trip over your own ego or did the floor finally fight back?”
I blinked. The joke landed flat in my brain. Humor. Was that humor? I didn’t laugh. Couldn’t. But the playfulness in his eyes cut through the fog.
“I… felt something,” I said. The words tore out of my throat, rough and raw, like gravel dragged through skin. I barely recognized them as my own.
‘Feel.’
The word sat there, ugly and impossible…because people like me weren’t supposed to feel anything at all.
William’s eyebrows shot up so high they nearly vanished into his hairline. He let go of my shoulder, crossed his arms, and leaned against the doorframe like he was settling in for a show.
“You. Felt. Something.” He snorted. “Right. And I felt like a ballerina this morning. Pull the other one, Alpha. You’ve got a concussion or something. Next you’ll tell me you cried at a sunset.”
“I did feel something,” I growled. Or tried to. It came out more like a confused rasp. “I really did.”
He stared. The smirk faded.
“Okay. Fine. Humor me. What exactly did you ‘feel’ that made the big bad Alpha eat dirt?”
I opened my mouth, but closed it almost immediately.
How do you explain color to someone born blind?
“It was… everything,” I started. “Like the world was gray. Always gray. Then the moment my eyes landed on her, something exploded inside me…like heat in my chest. I felt this… pull, this need to make anyone who hurt her suffer. To touch her. Make the bruises stop hurting. Make her look at me without hate.”
I paused, grasping for words that didn’t exist.
“It was loud inside. Roaring. Then she flipped me off and walked away, and it all… sucked back out. Left nothing. Just this.” I pressed a fist to my sternum. “Hole…this ache like…loss.”
William’s face went through stages…confusion, disbelief, then slow-dawning horror.
“Goddess above,” he muttered. “You’re describing the mate bond. Actual emotions. You—”
“Break it off,” I cut in immediately. Voice flat and final. “The marriage. To the other one. Sophia. Whatever her name is. I won’t go through with it.”
Silence.
William barked a short, incredulous laugh. “You can’t be serious, Alpha.”
“I am.”
“Rion.” He stepped closer, voice dropping low and urgent. “You can’t. This alliance has been in the works for months. Her godfather’s pack controls the eastern trade routes. If we back out now…especially after today’s spectacle…they’ll take it as an insult. And that’s assuming Sophia doesn’t burn the pack house down in a tantrum first.”
I stared at him. The hollow ache sharpened, twisting like a knife.
“I don’t care,” I said. “She’s not my mate. The other one is.”
“The mute girl that came with her?” William pinched the bridge of his nose. “The one who flipped you off like a sailor? Rion, you don’t even know her name.”
“Princess,” I said. I didn’t know why I felt she should be called that. But it fits. It felt right on my tongue.
William groaned. “Great. You’ve named her already. This is a disaster.”
Ray growled in agreement inside me. Find her. Claim her. Now.
The loss pulsed harder. Like a heartbeat that wasn’t mine.
“I need her back,” I said quietly. “Or the void comes back forever.”
William looked at me for a long moment and his grip tightened on my arm as I lurched toward the empty corridor again. Her scent was almost gone now…just a whisper teasing me forward.
“Alpha,” he muttered, voice low and urgent. “Let me get you inside the room first. Before you do something stupid.”
Gods, I wanted to shove him against the wall and run off to see her. But I didn’t. I chose not to.
My legs felt unsteady anyway, the void creeping back in thicker than before. He guided me through the door, and shut it firmly behind us.
My chambers felt colder. Emptier. The bed still bore the indent from where I’d thrown her. Her wildflower scent lingered faintly, mocking me.
William turned, face tight with worry and frustration.
“Alpha. Have you forgotten why I’ve spent months traveling to nearly every powerful pack in the region, begging for a marriage alliance? Every other girl took one look at you and fled screaming. Some threatened to end their own lives rather than stay a single night. We were losing hope…real hope that this pack could secure its future. But Sophia… daughter of the Beta of Dawn’s Creek, blood-tied to their Alpha… she agreed. Willingly. She’s not running like the others. She wants you. Wants this marriage as much as every soul in this pack needs it.”
His words landed heavy. I leaned against the wall, wiping blood from my nose as the hollow ache sharpened.
“You do remember why you have to get married as soon as possible?” he pressed. “You realize why we need an heir from your direct lineage…tied to a powerful family…before the year runs out, right?”
I stilled.
Of course I remember. The council’s deadline. The royal decree about branding my pack members rogues if there is no legitimate heir to secure the Royal blood in my lineage. Everything my father fought for would be gone.
I can't let that happen.
William stepped closer.
“You owe us, Alpha. You owe every family that followed your father into exile. They left titles, homes, safety…for him. For the Blood Moon Pack. For you. Sophia’s family has already signed the alliance. They’ve opened trade routes, started fulfilling their promises. And you want to break it all… because of some mute girl who could taint the lineage we’ve worked so hard to cleanse?”
Mute girl.
The words ignited something unfamiliar inside me.
A surge…red-hot, blinding…exploded through me. My vision narrowed on him as my body moved on its own.
I lunged, hand clamping around William’s throat, lifting him clean off the ground. His back slammed the wall, his feet kicking uselessly as his face turned purple.
It wasn’t me.
Ray had seized control…claws pricking my fingertips, as a growl vibrated through my chest.
William choked, hands scrabbling at my wrist. “R-Rion… let… go…”
The plea barely cut through the rage. I wrestled Ray back…hard…forcing my fingers open one by one.
William dropped to the floor, gasping, coughing and collapsing to his knees.
I staggered backward, slamming into the opposite wall. Chest heaving as my hands trembled. What the hell was happening to me?
William rubbed his throat, eyes wide with shock.
“This has to stop,” he rasped. “You’re losing control.”
He reached into his jacket and pulled out a small dark vial…silver liquid swirling inside.
“Here. Drink this. It’ll quiet your wolf. Keep Ray locked down until we’ve sealed the deal and you’ve marked Sophia as Luna.”
I stared at the bottle, my chest tight, caught between instinct and obligation. One swallow and the noise would stop…the hesitation, the weakness, the feelings I didn’t recognize and didn’t want. I’d be clean again. Focused. Ruthless enough to do what needed to be done.
Ray tore through my mind, pacing, snarling, slamming against my resolve, warning me not to touch it.
But I wasn’t just choosing for myself.
I had a duty to the pack. To the debt written in blood. To the future of the Blood Moon Pack.
And duty had never cared what it cost me.
I reached out slowly and reluctantly…my fingers brushing the glass.
Just then…
BAM. BAM. BAM.
A hard knock thundered against the door and my hand froze midair.
The bolt slid back before either of us could speak, the door creaked open and someone stepped inside.
- Writer
