A spider's whimper

Mistakes Can't Be Fixed(2)

The raven glanced up at the blonde, her gaze filled with a mixture of resentment and longing. She couldn't help but despise the stupid grin that adorned his scarred face, a constant reminder of the battles he had fought. Just as another wave of tears threatened to consume her, she gasped, her eyes widening in surprise as the blonde leaned in closer, their breaths mingling until their lips finally connected.

Penny's mind raced, feeling electrified as Johnny's lips met hers, leaving her frozen in the intense moment. Johnny's tight grip on her hips constrained her, while his other hand continued to stroke her unruly hair, soothing her in a strange mix of tenderness and seduction. A few lingering tears escaped from Penny's eyes, a testament to the emotional rollercoaster she had been on.

With a deep breath, Penny made a conscious decision to surrender herself to the intoxicating connection they shared. She closed her eyes, allowing herself to be consumed by the passion that enveloped them. Her hands instinctively reached out, grasping onto Johnny's shirt, pulling him closer as her body pressed against his.

As Johnny briefly broke their kiss, his words hung in the air, "I love you." The sincerity in his voice echoed through Penny's ears, momentarily silencing her whimpering. Before she could respond, their lips crashed together once more, muffling any doubts or hesitations she may have had.

Penny, despite feeling confused and in pain, couldn't ignore the authenticity in Johnny's words and actions. His love felt genuine as she opened her eyes to see him close to her. Yet, even in the blur, she found solace in the fact that he was there with her. As she leaned back slightly, breaking the kiss, she gazed up at his bright, blue eyes that met her own. A rush of warmth flooded her cheeks, causing them to flush with a rosy hue.

The intensity of their connection, coupled with the vulnerability of the moment, made Penny's heart race. Johnny's presence stirred emotions within her, his gaze piercing through her defenses irresistibly.

“You do know that I love you, don’t you?” Johnny asked, easily prompting a timid nod from the raven. The scarred man smiled and leaned up to give the calmed raven a kiss on the forehead. Penny felt the weight lift from her heavy heart. Even though it sounded as though Johnny might have been dumping her, his actions now made the raven wonder if that was really the case. He did say that he wouldn’t ever dump her, and that he loved her.

But if that was so…

Johnny's grin faded as Penny voiced her confusion, her words causing a shift in his demeanor. The usual playful expression on his face transformed into a strange, indescribable look. However, in the close proximity, Penny noticed something she hadn't seen before - a flicker of nervousness in Johnny's eyes.

The revelation of Johnny's nervousness sent a wave of curiosity through Penny. She couldn't help but wonder what could be making him feel this way. The contrast between his usual confident demeanor and this newfound vulnerability intrigued her.

The scarred man gingerly withdrew his hand from Penny's hair and reached into his back pocket, retrieving something hidden within. With his hand balled into a tight fist, he held it out in front of Penny's face, obscuring the contents from her view. Her eyes darted between his concealed hand and his gaze, her confusion intensifying with each passing moment.

A muttered remark escaped Johnny's lips, his voice tinged with a mix of amusement and nervousness. "Ha! Well, this is awkward... I had been practicing all day, but now it's primetime and I can't remember s**t," he chuckled weakly, confirming Penny's suspicions. Johnny, the epitome of confidence, was undoubtedly nervous. This was an entirely new side of him that she had never witnessed before.

Penny's curiosity grew, her mind racing to decipher the mystery concealed within Johnny's hand.

“I just want you to get that I’m not breaking up with you. I don’t ever want to be without you, baby girl” Johnny continued to insist, and earning another nod from the raven.

“And I want you to know that you’re more than just a girlfriend to me. You’re my everything. And I know it’s selfish of me, but…I wanna be your everything, too.”

“…you are my everything…” Penny muttered quietly, earning a small smile from her boyfriend until that nervousness overtook his face once more.

Johnny's voice trembled as he struggled to find the right words, his nervousness palpable. "I... I uh, I don't wanna ruin what we have," he stammered, his eyes searching Penny's for understanding. "We've got a good thing goin' on, and I don't wanna push you into something you don't wanna do. So please, just... don't say yes on my account."

Penny's heart wavered at the vulnerability in Johnny's voice. His words struck a chord within her, as he expressed his concerns and fears about their relationship. The self-deprecating comments that followed only added to her confusion. He spoke of his own flaws and insecurities, painting himself as a burden and a responsibility.

His voice softened, tinged with a mix of sincerity and a hint of self-deprecating humor. "Trust me, I'll get it. Waking up and looking at this face for the rest of your life isn't exactly healthy. Not to mention I'm f*****g insane. I'm a big responsibility and need constant supervision. Like a puppy. A really sexy puppy!" A small, nervous laugh escaped his lips as he attempted to ease the tension. "So just…please be sure about your answer, okay?”

Penny's fingers gently traced the side of Johnny's scarred face, her touch filled with tenderness and affection. She had grown accustomed to the way he talked about his scars, as if they were something to be ashamed of or burdened by. But in her eyes, they were a part of him, a testament to his strength and resilience. To her, his scars were beautiful.

As her fingers grazed his skin, a sudden realization washed over Penny, freezing her movements. Johnny's words echoed in her mind, "Waking up by Johnny's side for the rest of her life..." The weight of those words hit her like a tidal wave, stirring a mix of emotions within her.

The thought of spending the rest of her life with Johnny had never crossed her mind before. They had shared beautiful moments together, but the idea of committing to a lifetime together was both exhilarating and overwhelming. It was a decision that would shape the course of their future, entwining their lives in a way that Penny hadn't fully comprehended until now.

Wait..for rest of what life now?