Shattered Vows, Unexpected Bonds

MILIANI One...two....three... “You are the coffee to my mornings and....” No. “You are the reason I’ve learned to sleep with one eye opened and never to leave my coffee unattended. Happy anniversary, my....” No. That still didn’t make sense. “I love how we balance each other out, I’m the calm in your....” I stood in front of the mirror, practicing my anniversary speech for what felt like the hundredth time. I wanted it to be perfect, to make him laugh and feel loved. Striking a pose, I examined myself in the mirror. My hair was a mess and I had a smudge of mascara under my eye but I felt confident. I was going to nail this. “I love how you...” The gentle turn of the key in the lock interrupted my speech, announcing his arrival. My heart skipped a beat. Lennon was home early. I quickly smoothed out my hair and wiped away the mascara smudge. I took a deep breath, calming my racing heart. I wasn’t ready for him to see me yet. I needed a minute to compose myself. But it was too late. The door swung open and he walked in, looking tired and stressed and just before I could say what I had practiced since forever, he collapsed on the bed. I felt a mix of emotions swirling inside me. It was our anniversary and he hadn’t come home the night before although he had sent a text that he wouldn’t be home as some urgent work came up. Looking at him now, I saw the exhaustion etched on his face and the tension in his shoulders. My anger melted away, replaced by a deep desire to care for him, to make him feel better. I rushed to help Lennon take off his coat and bag but then, he pushed me away and rolled on the bed. Guilt washed over me, watching him work tirelessly, day and night to provide for us, to give us a comfortable life. I placed a kiss on his forehead and turned to the other side of the bed to sleep. ** I stood in front of the vanity, picking up my mascara and twisting it open as I leaned in to apply it when the doorbell suddenly rang, shrill and insistent. I paused, my hand hovering in midair when I heard it again. “BABE! ARE YOU EXPECTING SOMEONE?!” I shouted at the top of my lungs. My voice echoed through the house and I hoped it was loud enough to penetrate the sound of running water. “Yes.” He responded coldly and turned off the water. “Please, get the door. It’s a delivery.” A smile spread across my face and I could not help but feel a thrill of excitement. I was convinced the delivery was a special gift for me. Perhaps, something romantic and special, maybe it was flowers or chocolates. Whatever it was, I was sure it would be thoughtful and sweet. I opened the door to see a stranger standing on the porch and in his hands was a large envelope. “Good morning, ma’am. Are you Mrs. Dyer?” He asked, his voice, formal. I nodded and he handed me the envelope. “This has been delivered to you on behalf of your husband.” He handed me the envelope and turned to leave. I turned the envelope over in my hands, studying it for a moment. I could feel a sense of excitement and anticipation building up in me. I opened the envelope, pulling out the content and then, my smile froze. My heart skipped a beat as I read the words on the page. I rubbed my eyes and tried to force myself back to reality but this.... was reality. Divorce Petition. Irreconcilable differences. My mind reeled as I stumbled backwards. Divorce? How could this be? We were married, we were happy.... or at least, I thought we were. I saw how cold and detached he been in the past few months. I had attributed his distant behavior to the toll his job was taking on him. I had convinced myself that he was just preoccupied. I had made excuses for him. I stumbled back into the room, the divorce papers still clutched in my hand, my heart racing with shock and anger. Surprisingly, he was sitting calmly in his work chair, his back to me, typing away on his computer. The scene was so ordinary, so mundane, that it felt surreal. “What is this?” I slammed the paper down on his desk as I felt a surge of rage and hurt. He turned to face me, a look of mild surprise on his face as if he had not expected me to act this way. “It’s pretty obvious.” He said, his voice flat “You can read, can’t you?” “How did this even happen? How did this happen? When....how.... what... we were happy. i...” “I wasn’t.” He interrupted me. “I was never happy in this sham of a marriage. I only agreed to it because grandfather wanted this union to happen but now that he is no more, I think it is fair we bring this to an end.” I searched his face for any sign of remorse, any hint of apology but there was nothing. No regret, no sorrow. “You are not even sorry, are you?” I asked, my voice barely above a whisper. “No.” He said flatly. “Sorry but I am not sorry.” For four years, I thought our marriage was real and strong but I guess it was all a lie. “I know you have nothing.” He said, his voice dripping with condescension. “But don’t worry. I’ll give you something to set yourself up. You can start your own life, finally and no longer be an attachment.” Reality still failed to dawn on me but his words made me feel stupid. The way he said it, like he was doing me a favor, like I should be grateful, made my blood boil. “I don’t need anything from you. I will be out of your house and your life before you know it.” If anyone had told me things would take turn out this way, I would have denied it terribly.... not even after I saw that message from ‘Shirley’.