18+ warning: self harm)
Maya’s POV
I wake up with a yawn. I was dreaming of the black wolf and the lake again. I feel like each time I have the dream, I come closer and closer to finding out who the man behind the wolf is. But, just as I think I have him and am going to figure it out, I end up taking like fifty steps in the wrong direction and end up lost. I really am beginning to wonder what the dream means.
It’s finally Friday, tomorrow will be my birthday celebration. My mom has everyone running around doing so much in preparation for my birthday. This entire week has been something of madness. Between helping Alice get over her rejection, trying to calm my mom down about the party and thinking of the Lycan King being here, I am exhausted.
My mom has been reassuring me all week that the party will go smoothly and it will be the best night of my life. To be honest, the only thing that I am truly looking forward to about tomorrow is my shift. After what happened with Alice and my brother, I am not sure if I want to even meet my mate. They knew each other their entire lives and he still rejected her like a stranger. If my mate is from a different pack, I don’t think I could leave Alice after what happened with her mate bond. We have been friends from the time we could walk. I don’t think I could leave her even if my mate is the best thing that ever happened to me.
I get up and go through my morning routine. I have been feeling really off lately. I feel like something big is going to happen, but I have no idea what. I shower, brush my hair, do my skin care, my makeup, and at last get dressed. I am wearing a comfy pair of leggings and a dark blue turtleneck sweater. As well as tomorrow being my birthday, today is the last day of school and finals week. I have always hated taking those tests; it is brutal and a complete waste of time. They already taught us everything. I don’t get why they can’t let us be.
We have a ton going on in the next three days. It’s the tests today along with the last day of school, the huge birthday celebration tomorrow (I swear my mother invited half the population of werewolves), and then we have graduation on Sunday along with another huge party to celebrate everyone in the pack that graduated this year.
I grab my bag and head down to see if Alice is in her room. When I finally get there I knock.
“Just a minute!” She screams.
I don’t care so I just walk in. She is taking a shower in the bathroom. I sit down on her bed and scroll through my social media feed. I see a lot of last day of school pictures. I look through all my classmates and I can say I could care less about any of them. The only one I truly care about is Alice.
I see Alice walk butt naked out of the bathroom and start digging through her dresser.
“What are you looking for?” I say with a smirk. “Nice Butt!” I also say while slapping her butt from the bed.
“I just want to wear something comfortable. You know since we have to be sitting for eight hours straight today.” She says with an eye roll. She looks a bit pale, but I don’t think much of it.
“Okay, I’m ready. How do I look?” She asks.
I look up from my phone and see she is dressed in a plum purple pair of leggings and an oversized black sweatshirt. Her hair is in a bun on the top of her head, and she has a pair of black sneakers on.
“You look great. Let's go before we are late for our tests.” I say with a roll of my eyes.
I really didn't expect her to be taking her rejection as well as she has been. They say that when someone rejects their mate it's like losing a piece of yourself. There are a lot of wolves that die from losing their mates, or that are caught in a comatose state. They are alive, but they don’t speak, eat, walk, or do anything by themselves. It's really sad to see.
Alice seems to be just fine. She looks sad every once and a while, but she doesn't look broken or like it is affecting her a ton. My brother on the other hand. He has been locked in his room. Not talking to anyone, eating, or showering. The stench that is coming off his body is starting to make it out the door. I cringe at the thought, but he deserves everything there is to make him feel like cr*p after what he did.
We make it downstairs. I see the streamers and balloons scattered all over the place. I see tons of things being moved to make room for an excess amount of people that are going to be here. The people that are coming are going to be staying overnight. So, every available room is going to be used this weekend to house guests. Some of the people will even be sleeping outside in extravagant tents.
We grab a few granola bars each. We don’t have time for breakfast after Alice’s debate on what to wear. I internally groan. I love breakfast. I love food in general and I haven’t been eating much lately. I think I am just nervous about the huge celebration tomorrow.
We head out the door and to the school building. We eat our granola bars in silence. I have noticed Alice is quieter than usual. She hasn’t been talking as much or wanting to hang out. I feel bad. I wish I could kill my brother for her, but I don’t know if that's what she needs right now.
We make it to the school building and go inside. I am really not looking forward to this eight hour long torture, but it’s the last time in my life that I will have to endure it.
Alice’s POV
I wake up in the morning with no energy or will to do anything. Lately, all I have been wanting to do is lay in bed. I have been blowing off my family and friends. There have been so many times that both Axel and Maya have tried to get me to go out and do things with them, but I don’t feel like doing anything with them. I don’t feel happy like I used to. Something inside of me feels broken, like it's missing.
I drag myself out of bed and into the bathroom. My eyes land on the razor blade laying on the edge of the sink. I started using it again last night.
Flashback last night
I was running in my wolf form all around the territory. It seems that being in my wolf form helps with my sadness and hopelessness. Sapphire seems to be a lot more cheerful than I am, and that is unusual. Most of the time the wolf counterpart is more affected by rejection than the human counterpart. However, I guess that's not the case with my wolf. She seems the same as she was before the rejection. I mean she was sad for the first day, but when we woke up the day after, she was entirely back to her normal self. When I ask her why she's so happy, the only response I get is “The Moon Goddess has a different plan for us.” Super weird if you ask me
I get home from my run and change into my clothes I left in a pile outside the woods. I ran up to my room, feeling lonely and helpless once again. I don’t know why the moon goddess would do this to me. I must have made her mad.
I lock my bedroom door and go into the bathroom. I go into the doors under the sink searching for it. I finally found it under my spare box of pads. My blade. I guess old habits die hard. It was something I used to do in middle school to help with being bullied at school. But after what happened with my so-called mate, I have turned to it once again.
I bring the blade up to my wrist. It doesn’t do a whole lot because now I have my wolf and she heals me super fast, but the deeper I go the longer it lasts. I slice my arm from the elbow down to my wrist. I go deep enough to start a puddle of blood in the sink. At first it stings, but after a few seconds it gives me a calming feeling, a feeling of relief and peace. I throw my head back and enjoy the feeling. Then it closes up. I do it over and over again. Each time it closes digging deeper and deeper seeking the relief it is giving me.
End of flashback
I started craving this form of therapy shortly after I got rejected. I remembered all the times I got upset or overwhelmed when I was younger and remembered how much it used to help. I used to use my blade daily. Whenever I got upset or bored. I would cut. It became an addiction. No matter how much I did it, it was never enough.
I only ended up stopping when Maya found out. She agreed to never ever tell anyone, but I needed to stop. She ended up staying with me day in and day out for weeks. She was my rock whenever I broke down and couldn’t take my emotions anymore. She has been my rock through everything. But now, my main issue was I couldn’t let out my feelings to her because it’s her brother. He is the source of my pain and suffering. I can’t tell her….
I made my decision. I grab the blade off of the counter and turn the water on. I slice my arm over and over again. I throw my head back in relief. It’s my own personal drug. I cut until I feel dizzy from blood loss. Even feeling dizzy and disoriented, I continue.
While being lost in my own bliss, I hear someone knock on the door. “Crap, it's probably Maya.” I think to myself. I quickly shove the blade back into its cabinet and wash my arm off from all the blood. I turn the shower on and hop in. I quickly lather myself up in my mango bliss body wash to cover up the scent of blood.
When I finish my quick shower. I hop out and dry off. I run into my bedroom and open a drawer pretending to look through my clothes and be indecisive of what to wear. She suspects nothing. I pick the first outfit I see and change. She doesn’t seem to really be paying attention to me. I sigh in relief that she didn’t catch me. She would be furious.
We head downstairs to grab breakfast before we head to school. I don’t talk much at all. I’m thinking about doing it again when I get home tonight. And tomorrow before the party…
Lycan King POV
I wake up at 4am sharp. I have a lot of paperwork to do before we head to Moon Cry Pack to attend the eighteenth birthday party of Alpha Richard's daughter. I sit up with a groan. While training with Reese yesterday, he got a few good punches into my kidneys. I’m really feeling it today.
I get out of bed. I feel like utter s**t, but a king always has work to do. I agreed when I became king to always put my work before myself. Sadly, even though I want to sleep all day and watch movies while going through tubs of ice cream, I can’t because I have to get all my work done before I leave. Then, I will be there for an entire twenty four hour period. I will have tons of work when I get back too.
I hop in the shower and turn on some ice cold water to wake me up. There is not an easier way to wake up than to turn a shower on cold and spend a few minutes standing in it. I begin to lather myself up with my sandalwood scented body wash. Thoroughly enjoying my ice cold shower. That is until I look down and see my stubborn morning wood.
I sigh and squirt some shampoo in my palm. I grab a hold of my girth and begin to move my hands back and forth. I close my eyes and sigh as the feeling of pleasure begins to flow through me. I continue for another five minutes until I feel my release coming. With a grunt I release my seed onto the bathroom wall. “Oh how I wish I could find my mate.” I think to myself.
I do a quick wash of myself again before I get out of the shower and dry off. I decided to dress casually today. I picked out a pair of dark blue jeans and an ocean blue button down. I put on a pair of black shoes and head to my office.
When I arrive I am met with a very happy Reese.
“Why do you look so happy? We have tons of stuff to do today.” I say.
“We have a party tonight. Who wouldn’t be happy? Free booze, girls, and we don’t have to clean up the mess. How much better could it get?” He says with a grin plastered onto his face.
“We are there on business. Alpha Richard is a very good friend of mine and he is still good friends with my father. I don’t want you screwing that up. Got it?” I say. Reese likes to spend time with women that aren’t his mate. He hasn’t found that one yet, but he does like to keep many women as company. His mate is going to have a huge challenge when they meet. Every woman he’s ever been with thinks he belongs to her.
“Yes, your majesty.” Reese says with a bow.
“Knock that off you i***t!” I yell as we get into a play fight fist fight.
I hear the door open and know instantly who the two women who walked in are. My gamma, Topaz and the latest woman who has warmed my bed, Alisha.
“You two knock it off!” Topaz yells at both of us. I immediately followed her request. I may be king, but she has some mean punches when she gets angry.
Topaz, Reese and I have all been best friends since we were little. The three of us did everything together and they were the two people I would trust with my life. Reese is like a brother to me even though he may be an i***t. He is the strongest fighter in the kingdom beside myself. And Topaz is like my little sister. She has been with Reese and I since we all learned how to walk. She has trained with us and proved to be a strong capable fighter. I made her my third in command when I became the king and Alpha of all Alphas. She is just as strong as Reese and I when it comes to fighting. I have never seen her cry. That’s the kind of person I want to take care of my future Luna as her guardian. Each gamma is assigned their Luna to guard and protect with their life. I know Topaz will do just that when I find my beautiful queen.
Just as I stop fighting with Reese, Alisha comes up to me and wraps her arms around my waist. She goes to give me a kiss, but with Topaz and Reese watching it doesn’t seem right.
“Meet me in your bedroom babe and I’ll send you off the right way.” Alisha says with a wink before she leaves.
“Man, you really have to stop screwing around with girls. What are you going to do if you find your mate?” Topaz asks.
“I will break it off with her once I find my mate. All I need right now is someone to help take the edge off. We men have needs and it’s been three years and I still haven’t found my mate.” I told her. I am starting to get angry.
She found her mate the day she turned eighteen. She has never felt the same way as Reese and I because she has always had him. But, Reese and I have been without our mates for three years. It’s a long time to wait for someone who could spend another ten years to show up.
She puts her hands up in surrender.
“I’m just saying. What’s the plan for today?” She asks to change the subject.
“Yeah boss, what's the plan?” Reese joins in.
We will spend the entire morning working. It should be enough time to get everything done that needs to get done. After lunch, we will leave to head to Moon Cry Pack. Hopefully we will get there by dinner time. Have your stuff packed and be ready by then
“Okay, sounds good.” They both say in unison.
We all get to work. We spend the entire morning in the office getting all of the paperwork done. My mind keeps wandering to the party and if what Topaz said might be true.
“I might find my mate tomorrow.” I think excitedly.
Finally, the clock hits noon and we begin to pack up the paperwork and head down for lunch. As we are walking, I remember what Alisha offered me.
“Hey, I’ll meet you guys in the dining room. I have to pack quickly.”
They both just nod. I turn around and walk back the way I came until I get to my bedroom. I can hear that Alisha is waiting for me behind the door.
I open the door and the first thing I see is Alisha laying on my bed in a black lace bra and matching thong. She seems to be playing on her phone, but upon my arrival she looks up. Seeing me, she puts her phone down and I am immediately hit with the smell of her arousal.
“You took me up on my offer?” She asks with way too much enthusiasm.
I don’t answer her, I just continue to stare at her. She has voluminous breasts and hips with a tiny waist in between. She wears way too much makeup, but I am not interested in looking at her face.
Seeing that I am not going to answer her, she gets up and walks over to me, placing her hands on my chest. She knows I don’t want to kiss her. So, she trails kisses all over the side of my face and down my neck. Upon reaching my shirt, she grins and starts unbuttoning it. Once she slides it off she runs her hands down my bare chest trailing kisses after her hands. I’m getting sick of this touching. She is not my mate but I still want my release. I grab her under her thighs and throw her onto her bed. That action alone only makes the smell of her arousal more pungent in the air. I unbutton and pull my jeans and underwear down in one smooth motion. She sits on the bed biting her lip. She knows I don’t like it when she talks. She is not my mate. She is just s*x. I don’t care about her.
I grab her panties and tear them off her body and do the same thing with her bra. Not once did I look at her face. That's not what I’m here for. I roughly grab her mound in one of my hands and roughly massage it. I’m not sweet or gentle with her the way I will be with my mate. I leave marks on Alisha from how hard I grip her. I don’t care about hurting her. She likes it anyway.
I pull away from her body and position myself at her entrance. It’s disgusting how much she is dripping onto my sheets. I thrust into her anyway. Rough and hard until I hear her cry in pain and then m**n. I continue thrusting into her hard each time she cries in pain and then m**ns.
I flip her over onto her stomach.
“Kneel!” I command using my king tone.
She quivers, but complies with it anyway. Now her head is buried in the covers and her butt is in the air. She is still dripping onto my sheets. I’m going to have to make her change them before she leaves. I slam my c**k into her as fast and rough as I can. She is crying with her face buried in the mattress, but I feel her c*m all over me. So I know she likes it.
Shortly after her first or***m happens, she c*ms again and again, every few seconds I feel her clamp down on my c*ck and she c*ms on me. By the time I feel myself get close, the entire mattress is covered in her juices. I continue thrusting into her. Now it’s starting to feel good for me too. I decided to give her a little more pleasure since she is being so good for me.
I spit on her forbidden hole. And ram my thumb in. She starts m*****g uncontrollably into the sheets and I feel her clenching and unclenching constantly. She is having an or***m every few seconds. I continue to thrust my thumb and my c*ck. Until I feel like I’m about to burst.
I pull my thumb and my c*ck out. She is whimpering at her loss of contact with me. I spit on her forbidden hole once more before I ram my c*ck into her. I also take my fingers and push them into her p***y. I f*ck both her holes at the same time. I feel her starting to find her release and this time I find mine as well. I fill her with my seed. Then I fall beside her on the bed panting.
She is still laying with her butt up in the air and her face buried in the sheets. So, I push her over on her side so that none of my seed will actually get her pregnant. I get up and go take a shower. When I am done, I wrap a towel around my waist and walk back into the bedroom. She is still laying on her side. I grab a damp washcloth and push it between her legs, washing my seed off of her.
“Get up and take a shower. When you're done, change my sheets.” I say as I walk out.
“Wait!” She yells.
I turn around. I am annoyed at this point. “What?”
“Thank you for the s*x, daddy.” She says.
I don’t respond, I just walk out of the room.
I make my way to the dining room. As I walk in everyone bows to me as a sign of respect. I give everyone a head nod before I look around searching for Topaz and Reese. I finally spot them sitting at one of the tables in the corner.
I go grab a plate of food. Today we just have turkey sandwiches with celery and carrots. I bring my food over to their table.
“Hey, guys!” I say when I get there.
“You so had s*x with that b***h.” Topaz says and Reese snickers next to her.
“Shut up.” I say as I turn red in the face. She might be good s*x, but that doesn’t mean I’m proud of taking her to my bed.
We eat the rest of our meal in silence. Once we are done, we go to dump our trays in the trash and head to grab our luggage.
We all meet out in front of the house. Each of us with a bag in hand. We are taking about ten warriors with us for safety. Even though all three of us are great fighters ourselves, it never hurts to bring backup. We all get into the three black SUVs we are taking and we are off. Topaz, Reese and I all climb into one SUV and everyone else piles into the two others. I make Reese drive. It will be about a five hour drive to Moon Cry territory.