Placeholder (MxM)

Blind Leading part 2

I don’t understand…

Then at once there was silence… no one moved, or at least that’s what it sounded like… was the fight over or did my brain completely shut down at that moment? I couldn’t tell…

Then suddenly… I felt something over my shoulders. I panicked at first and then understood it was a coat…

Suddenly… I felt a bit warmer…

“What… happened?” I asked, my voice trembling as I clung to the coat, it wasn’t Miles’s… it was that other Alpha’s coat…

“I beat him up.” The man said as his hand touched the top of my head. “…the same way he hit you…” His hand moved to the side of my cheek.

Now I remembered… Miles had hit me that day, I knew it was a sharp pain but I forgot it would leave a bruise, and I went outside looking like that…

This man noticed that… and followed me here knowing I was hurt… he… did all that, for what?

“Why… did you… do that? I never asked for your help…” My voice was small, so much so that one probably wouldn’t be able to hear it if you didn’t pay close attention.

“Because Alphas that hurt their Omegas are the worst pieces of garbage…” That man spoke so confidently and yet it wasn’t domineering in the same way that Miles’s words were towards me.

“What happens now? When he wakes up… he’s going to… he’s going to be angry with me…” I began shaking, the very thought of having to endure any more than this made me feel like I was suffocated.

“You don’t need to stay with him.” The man told me, his words were sharp and his tone was pleasant but that was no more than wishful thinking.

“You don’t understand! I have no where else to go!” I yelled at him, for the first time in my twenty something years of existence I yelled at someone, anyone… a man… an Alpha…

I was frustrated…

“No one else will want someone like me! No one! He’s the only one that tolerates me! The only one!” I continued yelling at this point I was pouring out all my emotions as I grabbed the man standing next to me, I lashed out, I hit him… once, twice, my hands that were shaking, the coat that fell to the ground as I moved back and forth trying to land a hit on a man much larger than me… I was…

“You can come with me.” His only words that were followed by a heavy sigh… this man was so strange.

“As if I’d go with a strange unfamiliar man like you…” I slumped down to the ground and stayed there. Then the same coat was put over my shoulders once more.

“Listen… you don’t need to take this from him… he’s not that strong. Although you can’t see it, at the moment he’s on the ground, his face is bloodied and he’s too tired to even make a sound. Do you want this kind of pathetic man that beats you to continue standing by your side?” This person spoke so confidently, why was he like this?

“I don’t have anything else…” I stood up and moved forward. “Where is he? Where is Miles? Lead me to him, I need to treat his wounds…” I demanded and as reluctant as the other Alpha was, he did as I asked from him.

Soon as I reached Miles’s body it felt odd… his breathing was so shallow.

“You’re a monster…” I remarked without turning back, I knew the other man was still there because now I was focused on his scent.

It was odd, the other Alpha had such a faint scent that I can’t really feel it at all unless I concentrate solely on him and nothing else…

“I’m not the real monster here… but you’re right… I am one as well…” This man didn’t deny what he did, he didn’t justify it as something right. He knew it was wrong and he did it anyway…

“I… get him inside…” I tried to lift up Miles but he was simply too heavy, he was much larger than me, there was nothing I could do to drag him there.

“Sure…” This man agreed once more and carried Miles…

As we were back to the apartment I headed to the kitchen to get the first aid kit when suddenly I heard the man’s voice and it made me pause.

“Careful, there’s something on the ground, you’re going to trip over it if you step forward.” The man’s voice penetrated my ears.

“Ah, Miles probably put something there by mistake…” I justified it.

“There’s no way it was on accident.” The other man said the quiet part out loud. I knew Miles did it for his own amusement, seeing me trip and stumble was something he found joy in, or at least a quick chuckle. But I never did anything to stop him because…

Because…

I don’t know… did I love Miles? Do I still do?

“You don’t have to leave with me.” Suddenly the man behind me spoke quietly. When did he get there? He moves so quickly and silently that I can’t keep up. I lose concentration for one moment and he’s already so close by…

I turned around. “What do you mean by that?” I questioned him.

“If you’re uncomfortable with me, then I can take you to a shelter, the police station, or anywhere else… there are organizations that help Omegas in your position.” He spoke to me quietly with a calm voice. Why did it feel like he cared? It didn’t make sense, we had just met and he’s just…

“What does it matter to you, what happens to me?” I asked him through my head held low. I couldn’t explain this feeling that made me distrust him…

That’s right… no one treats you nicely unless they want something from you…

No one does things for free…

But what could he want from someone like me?

It can’t be my body… because Miles told me how bad I looked. I starved myself more and more trying to keep in shape so that at least he won’t be disgusted with me but it never seemed enough…

It can’t be because of wealth because I have none…

It can’t be because he’s just a good person because people like that don’t actually exist…

“What do you want from me?” I asked him straight up and the silence made me wonder… what if he’s a dangerous man? What if he’s a murderer? A stalker? Who else follows a woman home and beats up her husband like that!?

Then suddenly I felt his hands wrapped around me. I didn’t even dare to struggle… that’s it, he was going to hit me as well…

I braced myself but… nothing happened. There was no impact, there was no pain, there was nothing… just some warmth…

“I’m sorry… I’ll help you, I don’t need anything… just… don’t stay with someone like that… please…” His words sounded so pitiful, although I should have been the pitiful one here… why… why did hearing him make me feel so bad?

Why was he like this?

Before I realized it I had tears rolling down my face… trickling down one after another…

Chapter 3: Beginings

***

Miles always told me I was ugly when I cried… so I never did in front of him. I’d always wait to be alone, to be outside, to make sure no one sees me… So why was I crying in front of this man right now?

In front of a total stranger?

That night I left that house… I left Miles and I went with him… not because I trusted him but because at this point I just didn’t care what happened…

I’d rather have this moment last just a few more seconds…

Even if this person’s kindness is completely fake… for a moment… when he held me, he hugged me and apologized to me. I felt like I wasn’t so alone anymore… just for a second…

It was so warm it made me think how wonderful it would be if I had a life like that… someone to hold me and reassure me while I cry, someone that cared, someone that would… be there for me…

If only this type of happiness existed for me… then maybe I wouldn’t hate this world so much… no it’s not the world that I hate… but myself…

“I’ll take you back to my place for now, are you alright with that? I have a guest room and the door locks from the inside, so you won’t have to worry about me staying with you.” He explained.

“You… don’t want to stay with me?” I asked him in confusion.

“I don’t want to make you uncomfortable…” This man drove me back to his house and said those words… I didn’t know what came over me but at that moment I reached out and he held my hand.

“I don’t want to sleep alone tonight…” Those words escaped my lips and then I heard a sniffle. Was he crying? No way… why would he…

“Okay… I’ll sleep next to you…” He told me as he lead me inside. I held his hand and he told me everything that was around me so I wouldn’t trip or hit myself at anything.

He was being far too kind…

I laid down at that bed… and I waited…

“Nothing is going to happen, don’t look so frightened… this is why I suggested I sleep in another room…” The man spoke in a low voice, he was next to me in bed but didn’t touch me, only I continued to hold onto his hand… somehow it gave me the slightest bit of comfort to do so.

“Don’t you want some kind of repayment?” I asked him. I expected something, maybe that he wanted to sleep with me despite the way I looked. I used to hear that Alphas didn’t care who they sleep with.

“I told you I don’t want anything, you don’t need to give me anything… just sleep… I’ll go in another room.” At that he stood up from the bed and left. I stayed there for a while. As my mind continued racing I couldn’t figure anything out… I didn’t know what to do so finally I stood up and carefully wanted towards the door. I somewhat remembered where it was. Then around the same floor… until I reached a door and I opened it. “Are you there?” I asked but no response, so I opened another door and another…

Until finally he responded at one of the doors. “Do you need anything, water?” He asked me and I heard the creaking of the bed so I headed towards the sound. Along the way I tripped over something on the ground, it felt soft like a pile of clothes.

Before I realized it I landed on top of him on the bed.

“Are you alright?” He asked me. I clung to his shirt and breathed heavily… I didn’t understand any of this… I wasn’t alright.

“Tell me what do you want from me.” I demanded once more and he held my hand.

“Nothing. I don’t want anything…” He repeated himself but somehow I couldn’t accept that response.

“There must be something.” I told him.

“Why, why must there be something I want?” He asked me with a serious tone.

“Because there aren’t any good and selfless people in this world… because… because I have to give you something to deserve this nice treatment… how can it be fair that you did that for me and I give you nothing!?” I was yelling again, it might become a habit… why did I feel so comfortable around this man that I’d yell at him?

“There are good people in the world… I might not be one of them, but there really are good ones out there…” He told me as he hugged me once more.

He held onto me and gave me that familiar warmth from before… that warmth… why was I clinging to it that night?

“My existence isn’t worth anything… if I can’t give you something you want…” I muttered in a low voice. I sniffled and felt the drool and snot trickling down my face. “I… have to…”

“Then if you want to give me something I want… how about you tell me a bed time story?” Suddenly these ridiculous words escaped his lips.

“A story? I don’t know a*********s…” I said as I sighed.

“Then a song?” He questioned.

“I… can’t really sing…” I muttered. “…but I can try to tell you a story… about well… maybe…”

“Okay, how about you sleep now and tell me what you dreamt about the next morning? Is that alright?” He asked me as if my decision mattered.

“…sure… right…” I don’t know why but his ridiculous request somewhat made me laugh but it also confused me so much that I didn’t know what to do…

I closed my eyes and as he held me throughout the night I slept soundly… I don’t think I’ve ever slept so soundly in my life…

A part of me was still a little bit afraid though…

That the moment I open my eyes again I’d realize that all of this was just a dream… that I had dreamed of a man that saves me from my hurt… that I dreamed of a person that cared so much about me without wanting absolutely anything in return…

I was so scared… of reality…

If this was a dream then I hoped I could stay asleep for just a while longer, a few more moments…

I didn’t want my consciousness to slip away… but soon enough I drifted off to sleep… and the dream I had that night…

It was of a large place… a mansion… the ones I’ve heard about… there was sounds of chatter in the background, and I was wearing a dress… and I could see it all so clearly… these images I’d never be able to experience in real life…

In my dream I felt like a princess… and there was this voice of the man that helped me… I couldn’t imagine what his face looked at first so it was always shrouded in darkness, but his faint scent and his voice I could recognize so there was no doubt it was him…

Then I woke up the next morning in a daze…

END of Blind Leading