Falling for my enemy

The Fight

         "What's up with you El today and yesterday you have been acting so weird. First, you went home with that jackass, second, you got drunk yesterday, and you were late this morning which you hate being late more than anything baby please tell me what's up."

I need to get this out and not keep leading him on like this anymore.

“I want to break up and before you think it’s about

Payton or if he did or said something. I have been thinking about this for a while now and I feel like I need something else in my life. I may be stupid for doing this and we will end up getting back together in like a week but I need this and we need this maybe the thing that brings us closer in the future. I will always love you for the rest of my life and I wish you all the happiness in the world.”

He looked at me shocked he was holding back his tears and pain I knew was in his heart I also knew that I had broken him. I had broken his heart, his hope in our future, and his dreams that I knew he dreamt or hoped for because I know him better than his friends or family. “I……. can’t believe you, Ellie, what the f**k. We have been together since freshman f*****g year and now you want to throw all our love away for some bullshit. I have given you all that love in my f*****g body I can give and you just want to throw that away so you can f*****g hoe around then come crying back to me when you realize that your regret that you f*****g did.”

His words broke me. I felt tears stinging my eyes and a lump in my throat with a sharp pain in my stomach. “I am not going to hoe around and I have thought about this ever since you joined the f*****g football team and you have f*****g changed I also know you have been f*****g taking steroids for you damn father. I can’t be around you when you are your bitchy-ass self or when you blow up on me for no reason. I am not going to deal with someone like my mother or my brother. I want to be with someone who will not take his f*****g anger out on me when something doesn't go right in his perfect life and don’t try to say you don’t have a perfect life when you do. You have a rich daddy who buys you anything you want when I don’t even get to see my dad because he f*****g KILLED HIMSELF and you complain about yours every damn day.”

He slapped me right across my face. I was shocked I felt the pain starting to sting my face. I had no word to explain how I was feeling at that moment. All I knew I needed to get away from him as fast as I could but then Payton came running and before I knew it he was on top of Jackson beating the s**t out of him. “Jackson get the f**k off him NOW YOU f*****g ASS.”

“YOU DON’T f*****g DESERVE HER YOU PIECE OF s**t TELL ME WHI I SHOULDN’T KILL YOU HERE AND NOW.”

“GET OFF ME YOU SON OF A BITCH.”‘ I was frozen at the sight of these two going at it fighting to beat the s**t out of each other. All I could do was stare at them and watch them try and kill each other.

I saw a bunch of people running over including teachers and staff trying to break up the fight. I finally was knocked out of the daze I was in. “Ms. Williams, come with me to the principal's office.”

“Ok, Mr. Yeller.”

We walked to the principal’s office. I was numb at this moment and the weed that I had was finally taking its effect. I was high out of my mind and I hope I don’t get into trouble for being high. We walked into the office and I was them all bruised up and blood with bloody knuckles from beating the s**t out of each other.

“So, Ellie Ann, how did this whole situation transpirate between you Jackson and Payton.”

“I had broken up with Jackson and he had slapped and before I knew it Jackson came and they started to beat the s**t out of each other.”

‘Language Ellie, but do you know if anything like this had happened between these two boys before?”

“I know that Jackson doesn't like Payton and vice versa but I don’t know if anything else like this had happened before but I do know one thing”

“What is it, Ellie?” I didn’t know if I should tell them about Jackson’s steroid and drug abuse but I will help them get him away from his dad and me.

“Jackson has been abusing steroids and drugs which have been giving bad rage problems. I haven’t told anyone because I didn’t want something bad to happen to him but now that we are broken up I don’t care anymore what happens to him. I want to have him away from me forever and not be scared that he would do something.” I felt relieved to get this off my chest. I was questioned by the police since Jackson hit me and since I was the witness to this whole s**t show. I was suspended for not telling anyone and for watching them fight but Jackson was being expelled and Payton was being suspended for two weeks.

I had driven myself home. I went straight to my room and fell asleep. I had woken up to someone ringing my doorbell. I did not want to leave the comfort of my bed. I wanted to be dead to the world. I finally got up and threw on a sweatshirt since I was only wearing skimpy pajamas. I looked through the peephole to see who it was and I saw Payton. He was holding a pizza box and a bag. I opened the door to let him in and he quickly put the pizzas on the table by the door. Then pulled me into a hug and I quickly hugged him back. As soon as he did that I broke down. “Ellie it ok just let it out.” I don’t know how long we were there for me crying and him holding me like we were friends or he was my boyfriend. I haven’t cried like this since my dad died. That was the hardest day of my life the day that broke me and the day I started to drink, smoke, and drink. This day was the day that I completely broke once more the thing that I was scared of or being abused again as my mom would always do to me after my dad had killed himself. She would f*****g blame sit on me but it was her f*****g fault she leads him to f*****g kill himself because she couldn't f*****g keep her legs closed and she would f*****g treat him like f*****g s**t.

“Can you get me my bag please Payton, it's on that chair.”

“Yeah of course here you go.”

I pulled out my vape pen and took a long hit of it and let it sit in my lungs to help calm me down. Payton grabbed it out of my hand and took a hit himself coughing out the smoke.

“I am guessing you have never done this before?”

“No never I just wanted to see what all the hype was about, but why the f**k do you do this to yourself.”

“It’s a form of stress relief and control in my life especially after my dad died and my mom treated me like s**t I started to hang out with people who drank, did drugs and smoke so I joined so here we are now.”

“Those were bad friends for letting you do that wait how old were you when you started to this s**t”

“I was 14 when I started to do this to myself in your words but my dad died when I was 12.”

I took another hit walking into the kitchen to pour myself a drink and check my weed stash to smoke later when Payton had left since I don’t want to corrupt him. He is too good for this s**t.

“Bring the pizza you asshole I am f*****g hungry and do you want a drink because I sure the hell do.”

“Yeah whatever you are having.” I poured him a drink too and quickly downed mine then pouring another on then downing that too.

“So, what the f**k happened between you and that fucker earlier that would lead him to f**k put his hands on you.”

“I….broke up with him.” I quickly downed another drink then took another hit. The saying f**k it and rolled the most perfect joint and lighting it.

“What the f**k put that s**t out you know how bad that is for you Ellie Ann,”

“I am in a mood where I don’t give two f***s about anything to were I let you in my f*****g house after yesterday. I can easily kick you of my f*****g house without even thinking about it.”

“Sorry I just don’t see you like this type of person. I guess I still see you as the girl who I had a massive crush on with those adorable pigtails and braces.”

I was shocked at what he had said he liked me than before I was f*****g broken before my dad died when I was pure and innocent. The girl who would never smoke or do drugs and wanted to stay pure until marriage and didn’t have that taken away from me one day I was f*****g high. We had hung out and were both getting really drunk and high. I was surprised he took part in my bad activities.