Loving Izi

Chapter I

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I held my head up high and I saw the perfect baby-blue sky with those varieties of fluffy clouds comfortably giving company to its vast. Birds softly singing in the trees as though they're inviting the fresh wind who was already brushing through my skin. A fine day it is. 

I'm here waiting for the time to come while Urm was busy on her phone. I unconsciously pout my lips when I realized that Urm was not in the mood to be nosy right now. Wala tuloy akong magawa. 

Dinampot ko ang bag ko sa tabi niya. To alleviate my boredom, I opened my book and continued reading the last chapter. 

Nasa part na ako kung saan ang bida ay mamatay nang may naaninag ako sa peripheral view ko. Bumaling ako sa left side ko and as usual, my heartbeat is pounding again on its abnormal pace.

"Oh no. Here we go again." Urm said while shaking her head.

Walking arrogantly with his minions by his side, he was nonchalant with all the attention he was drawing from the clamoring crowd. His clean and neat uniform fit perfectly on his sculpted body, the necktie hanging candidly and his usually stoic face made him more fiercely attractive. 

Almost the girls gasped (including me) when he unconsciously brushed his ash gray hair with his firm hand, making it messier. 

He found my eyes looking at him. Napaupo ako nang maayos nung papunta siya sa banda namin. 

"Ang epal kahit kailan." Bulong ni Urm.

I hushed her. Galit siya talaga kay Izi. Well, Izi is really indeed epal but I don't mind. That's one of his charms I guess. 

"Uy Urm! Nandiyan ka pala. Hindi kita nakita ah." Pang-iinis ni Jun sa kanya. Itinaas naman ni Urm ang kilay niya at tinignan nang masama si Jun.

"Sino ka ulit?"

Jun winced when Urm bluntly told her that. "You're too mean Urm. Ano yun nag ka amnesia ka agad at nakalimutan mo ang pinakagwapong lalake na nagngangalang Jun sa mundong inaapakan mo?" He said while flexing his muscles.

She scoffed and rolled her eyes. "You're too stupid Jun-Jun. Ano yun naging bulag ka at hindi mo agad nakita ang pinakamagandang nilalang sa ibabaw ng mundong inaapakan mo?! Asshole." Agap niya.

"Miss, kung kagandahan lang naman pala ang basehan. Pwes, walang wala ka sa ganda ng lola ko. You're way out of her league."

"Really? Then I kinda pity you because you didn't inherit her beauty. Mukha ka kasing talampakan ko. Oh hindi pala. You're way out of its league."

Napahagalpak naman nang tawa si Nike dahil sa banat ni Urm. Napanganga lang si Jun habang nakangisi si Urm pero obvious pa rin ang inis sa kanyang mukha. Umiling na lang ako at bumaling na kay Izi na naiinip.

"Did you finish it?" 

"Yeah. Kukunin mo na?" Binuksan ko ang bag ko at hinanap ang module na ginawa ko kagabi. 

"Ang bobo mo kasi kahit kailan. Sabi kong huwag mong asarin yan dahil sure na talo ka tol." Nike said at binatukan niya pa si Jun. These are Izi's best buds (I think). Ang dalawang to kasi ang lagi niyang kasama. 

"Here." Sabi ko sabay abot sa kanya ng module. Kinuha naman niya ito. He briefly opened it and surveyed what it's inside. 

"Thanks." He uttered lazily and immediately turned his back on me. Walang pag-alinlangan siyang umalis sa harapan ko, habang ang dalawa naman ay magkaakbay na lumayo sa amin at sumama na sa kanya.

"They ruined my morning! Those ugly three blind mice! At ikaw naman! Martyr ka na nga sa kanya naging katulong ka pa niya?! Ano sunod na gagawin mo para sa kanya?! You're going to cook for him? Do his laundry?! Lilinisin ang sasakyan niya?! My gosh Ianne! Hindi kita matake!" Tuloy tuloy niyang sabi habang umiiling. She's really disappointed. It was just one module at grabe na kung makapagreact siya.

"Ngayon lang naman siya humingi ng favor Urm." I said calmly, but her face is now red as tomato. 

"Kahit na!" She shouted kaya napapikit ako.

"Urm, can you refrain from shouting? Pinagtitinginan na tayo oh." Sabi ko at medyo napayuko dahil sa mga kuryusong mga mata na nagmamasid sa amin. 

"Duh. Like I care! Ano?! Anong tinitingin tingin niyo diyan?! Suntokan na lang oh?!" Tumayo pa siya at umambang sumugod nung hinigit ko siya paupo.

"Urm! What do you think you're doing? Jeez. Can you please calm your mind? Mapapagalitan tayo nito." I uttered. Wala talagang sinasanto ang babaeng to. 

I heard the bell rang so all the students walked briskly to their respective rooms, and so do we. Hinila ko na si Urm na nag-aabulturo pa rin. 

The extended hallway made it more difficult for us to run. Why didn't I think about that? Ang next subject namin ngayon is sa kabilang building pa. Sana hindi na lang namin hinintay na mag ring ang bell nang sa ganun hindi kami male-late sa klase namin ngayon.

"Ianne! Slow down! Late na tayo kaya lubos lubusin na natin." Naiiritang sambit sa akin ni Urm but I just ignored her. Hinila ko siya ulit at kumaripas na ng takbo hanggang sa makarating kami sa classroom namin. 

Pero napanganga na lang ako nang madatnan namin na magulo ang classroom at wala pa ang prof. The chairs are dancing incoherently. Some of the boys are seating comfortably on top of their tables and the girls are busy gossiping about something. Lahat sila may kanya kanyang ginagawa.

"Hoy! Mga siraulo! Nasaan ang matanda nating professor?!" I winced when I heard Urm shouted again. Bakit ba ang hilig niya sa pagsigaw?

"Absent siya Urm. Gawa na lang daw tayo ng Module." Sagot ng kaklase namin. Ano ba yan? So napagod lang ako sa wala?

"So... what are we gonna do Ianne? Tapos naman natin yung Module." Napaisip naman ako sa sinabi niya. 

"Sa Botanical Garden na lang tayo. Mas tahimik doon." She immediately agreed. 

But before going there, Urm went to the cafeteria to buy some snacks. Hinintay ko naman siya at makalipas ng ilang sandali, nakita ko na siyang naglalakad papunta sa akin.

Her face and her personality contrast. She had an angelic face that could allure you to put in mind that she's an angel sent from above. Very innocent and sweet na hindi mo inaasahang may tinatago pa lang siyang kademonyohan sa loob. 

When I first met her, I thought she was quiet and shy but she was indeed the opposite. Kaya siguro nagustuhan ko siya. Unlike me who's into books and silence, siya yung walang araw na hindi sumisigaw o may malait na ibang tao. 

"Ianne! Let's go! OMG! Kanina pa kita tinatawag diyan." Napakurap ako nang marining ko ang sigaw niya sa harapan ko. Why is she shouting again? 

"W-What?"

She groaned. "Tara na sabi eh." At hinila na niya ako papunta sa Botanical Garden. 

The familiar delightful scent waft through the warm fresh air. The green with a soft touch of colors welcomed my eyes. It felt like I'm in a sort of fairytale every time I'm here. The birds chiming as though they're agreeing to my euphoric feeling. 

We went to a kiosk who is perfectly located in the middle of this garden. Vines are slowly trailing its wall as the golden ray of the sun quietly poured down making the garden more paradisiacal as ever. 

I opened my book and continued reading the last chapter again. Tears were beginning to blur my vision as the enormous feeling of sentimental submerged within for the last word of this book was being read by me. 

"Hoy! Why are you crying?" Agad kong pinalis ang luha sa mga mata ko nung mapansin ito ni Urm. I cast a subtle smile then shook my head.

"It's just the book." Napabuntong hininga siya at agad isunubo ang isang napakalaking chicharon sa kanyang bunganga.

"Bakit ba kasi ang hilig mo sa tragic stories? Tanga tanga naman nito." Sabi niya at sumubo ulit ng isang chicharon.

Kumuha rin ako ng isa at sinubo ito. "Well, to be honest, nakakarelate kasi ako sa mga ganyang stories. I'm into reading tragic than stories who had happy ending on it." I saw her moue with my explanation.

"Bakit? Feeling mo ba na sa love story mo eh mamamatay ka? How stupid! Mas mabuti na lang kung si Izi na lang ang mamamatay! Palibhasa wala namang naiaambag na maganda sa mundong ito. Puro pagwapo lang at ano... at paepal!" Nagaabulturo na naman ang mga kilay niya dahil sa inis.

"Urm, don't say that. Tragic is not all about having your lover dead in the end. Meron din yung mahal niyo naman ang isa't isa pero hindi talaga kayo pwede, like the infamous line "Pinagtagpo ngunit hindi itinadhana". Pwede ring yung, either you both grew apart or you both fell out of love." 

"Yeah right. Relatable sayo yang mga yan dahil ang love story mo naman ay one sided, yup I get it." She said while gesturing her thumbs up to me. 

Kumain na lang siya ng kumain hanggang sa naubos niya lahat ang mga binili niyang pagkain. Yung chicharon lang yata ang nakain ko. Well, I didn't mind. Just by watching her happily eat all the snacks makes me full and that is already enough. 

We stayed there for few minutes and just enjoyed the peaceful ambience of the garden. Pero nasira yata lahat ng kapayapaang yun nang may marinig kaming unggol sa hindi kalayuan. 

"What the f**k?" Malutong na mura ni Urm, kaya agad ko itong tinakpan.

"Quiet." Mariin kong sambit sa kanya. 

She stood up and surveyed the area. Nung may nahagilap siya, agad siyang yumuko at napansin ko ang mga gulat sa kanyang mga mata. 

"What is it?" I asked curiously. Umiling siya at hinila na ako pero hindi ako nagpatinag.

"Why Urm? Ano yung nakita mo?" 

"I-Ianne, kasi ano... Basta! Hali ka na!" Naiinis niyang sabi ngunit gamit ang mahinang tono.

"Hmm~" I heard a girl moaned and this time mas klaro na. I furrowed my eyes and followed that sound. Papunta na ako sa likod ng kiosk nang higitin ako ni Urm.

I faced her. "What?" 

"Don't Ianne. Just don't." She warned me but I'm too curious kaya binalewala ko na lang siya at sumilip sa likod ng kiosk. 

"Ah~ s**t!" 

I felt my heart shattered into pieces when I saw the scenario. Izi was topless while being pleasured in kissing that girl. They're doing something that I never imagined I could see it with my own eyes. 

"I-Izi?" I stuttered. He quickly turned his face to us. I clenched my fist, trying my best not to cry in front of him.

Shocked was very evident on both of their faces. The girl immediately buttoned her blouse and fixed herself.

"I-Ianne? What are you doing here?" Napatingin din siya sa katabi ko. 

"Anong what are you— Tangina! Ikaw! What are you doing here?!" Sabi ni Urm at sinugod niya pa si Izi. 

"Urm please." Awat ko sa kanya kaya naman huminto siya at tinignan na lang ng masama si Izi.

Ibinaling ni Izi ang tingin niya sa akin. Nakakunot ang noo niya and I saw a glint of fear in his eyes, at ang sakit non. I know the meaning of that fear. Alam ko kung para kanino yan. 

"Izi, let's go somewhere." Narinig kong sambit ng babae niyang kasama. 

"What?! You b***h!" Sigaw ni Urm at hinila na niya ang buhok ng babae. 

"Ahh!" The girl cried in pain. Urm didn't give the girl a chance to fight back. Sinabutan niya ito hanggang sa napaiyak na lang ang babae. 

"Urm!" Hinala na ni Izi si Urm palayo sa babaeng iyak ng iyak at gulong gulo na ang buhok niya dahil sa pagsabunot ni Urm sa kanya. 

"Sa likod ng kiosk talaga Izi? How cheap!" She yelled and then she faced me.

"Let's go." Mariin niya sabi at hinila na niya ako palayo.

"That mother fucker! Oh he will f*****g regret this!" Pagrarant ni Urm habang kumakain ng junk food. 

We're here inside the cafeteria. Ayaw kong pumunta sa classroom dahil baka nandoon si Izi. I don't want to see him for now. That scenario was a big blow for me. I know I don't have the right to be mad at him or even just feel jealous, kasi in the first place, he made it clear to me that he will never love me the way I love him, though hindi naman talaga niya sinabi. But I can see the way he stares that lucky girl. 

I can't help it. The pain in my chest is still alive kahit ilang oras na ang nakakalipas nang madatnan namin silang ganun. 

"Are you sure you're okay? Sasamahan na lang kita Ianne." 

"No Urm. I'm okay. You should go na, baka kasi malate ka pa sa pupuntahan mo." Uuwi na kami pero yung driver ko eh nasiraan yata kaya matatagalan ang pagsundo niya sa akin. Magcocomute na lang ako, alam ko naman eh. But she wanted to accompany me though I know my pupuntahan pa siya. Nasabi niya yun kanina sa akin.

"Fine. Just text when you get home." I nodded.

"Alright. Bye Ianne! I love you." She said while waving her hands at me.

"Bye! I love you too!" I waved back.

Nang hindi ko na siya maaninag, napabuntong hininga na lang ako at lumabas na rin sa school gate. I wend to the waiting shed which is just across the road. 

Umupo ako doon at naghintay ng tricycle para makauwi na ako. 

Habang may iniisip akong malalim, naramdama kong may umupo sa tabi ko. Inangat ko ang tingin ko at nagulat nang makita ko si Izi.

My traitor heart is pounding again. Making it pump more blood than the usual. Izi is staring at me with his serious eyes. I can't help but stare back. He's here. He's here beside me. Hindi ko maiwasang umasa. Nandito ba siya dahil sa nangyari? Is he going to say sorry to me? 

"Ianne, about what happened." He said. I faced him and waited for his next words. So it's true. He's here because of what happened a while ago. 

"Please, huwag mong banggitin ito sa kanya. That girl was just a pastime Ianne. Siya pa rin. Please, promise me you won't say anything to her." But then again, bakit pa ako umasa? Lagi na lang. 

He came to me dahil takot siya na baka magsumbong ako sa pinakamamahal niya. Na baka sasabihin kong nagchecheat siya. Na may iba na siyang mahal. I won't do that. Bakit? Kung sasabihin ko ba yun, magugustuhan na niya ako pabalik? No. 

"Hindi ko sasabihin sa kanya Izi. Don't worry." I assure him kahit ang sakit sakit na. I slightly hoped na sana pumunta siya sa akin para humingi ng sorry kasi alam niyang hindi ko nagustuhan ang nakita ko kanina, but that will never happen. He just simply don't like me. 

"Okay. Thank you Ianne." He said at tumayo na siya. A Thank you from him dahil gagawin ko na naman ang gusto niya. Ako na naman ang nag-adjust. But still, I love him so much that I will endure every pain. 

No sorry from him, just a painful thank you.

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