Flowering Dreams

Bad Decisions

I quickly threw my blanket around me as Dillan began putting his clothes back on. Kate was in shock, staring off into space. Jordan had turned his back to us, I could feel the anger rolling off of him. Once we were both covered, Kate looked at me and for once was at a loss for words.

"Kate, I am so sorry. I shouldn't have used our room like that without discussing with you first. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." The apologies just kept coming out of my mouth.

"I'm just.. surprised." Her face was hard to read, but I thought I detected some anger. "It's your room too, so it's not a problem. Just put a sock on the door or something next time." Jordan stiffened when she said 'next time.'

"Yes, of course. I should have been more considerate. I'm sorry."

"Would you stop apologizing all the damn time!" Jordan's voice was loud and harsh as he whipped around to look at me. "You made a mistake, it isn't the end of the world. No matter how big of a mistake it was." He glared at Dillan.

"Why are you yelling at her? Actually, why are you even here? You obviously aren't a part of this conversation so why haven't you left yet?" Dillan stood from the bed and was about a foot infront of Jordan. Both of them shooting daggers with their eyes.

"It's not your place to tell me whether or not to be here. So why don't you get out of my face. If Millie and Kate want me to leave, then I will go. Otherwise, I'm staying right here." Jordan said.

"You got a lot of nerve you know that? I'm the one who Millie invited into her bed, not you. So why are you acting like this is any of your business? Go be a jealous little puppy dog somewhere else." Dillan smirked at him.

I saw Jordan's fist clench, so I jumped between them before it went any further. I was facing Jordan and coaxed him to look at me. "Hey, it's ok. Will you just give us a minute? I'll meet you by the fountain. I just need to talk to Kate ok?" My voice was soft and soothing. I could see his body relax at my words.

"Fine. Don't take too long though, or I will come back up to check on you." He threw one last glare at Dillan before walking out the door. Dillan whistled at him and said "Good boy." I turned on my heels and shut the door before they started up again.

"What is wrong with you!? Why would you say those things to him!?" I yelled at Dillan.

"He obviously has a thing for you, Millie. Any i***t can see it. He started it, so I was just going to finish it." He smirked at me like he was doing something heroic.

"No. There will be no 'finishing it' because there is nothing to be finished. Neither of you have any claim over me so there is no reason to act like that. I can tell that this whole night was a mistake. I'm sorry Dillan, but I'd like you to leave now." I made sure my voice was stern.

"So he starts stuff with me, and I'm the one getting punished for it? Come on, Millie. Please don't do this." He began begging.

"I'll talk to you tomorrow, Dillan." I crossed my arms over my chest, holding the blanket tight around me.

"Millie, please can we just talk about this for a minute? Why are you acting like I did something wrong?" He kept pleading with me. His eyes sparkled and I could smell his breath on my face. I was about to give in.

"She said to leave." Kate spoke up. I had almost forgot she was here because of how quiet she was. Her and Dillan stared at each other for a moment before he turned and walked out. The door slammed behind him and it was suddenly very quiet.

"Kate.."

"Don't, Millie. I already know everything. Jordan told me what happened the other night between you two. I can't believe you did this! What is going on with you?" Her voice was concerned.

"I.. I don't know." I sat back down on my bed and put my face in my hands. I felt a lump forming in my throat and my breathing begin to get ragged. Kate sat next to me and put her arms around me. We sat there for a minute, me sobbing and her soothing me.

"I'm starting to get worried about you. All you've talked about since I've met you is how much you wanted the 'love at first sight' fantasy. You've turned down every guy I've thrown in your direction because you wanted it so badly. If this Dillan guy isn't your fairytale man, then why was he in your bed?"

"That's a good question, I wish I knew how to answer it. I think it's mostly just a lust thing. There is something about Dillan that draws me in, like two magnets being pulled together. As hard as I try to stay away from him, I just fail in the end." I looked down at my lap, embarrassed at my lack of self control.

"Well, maybe it's one of those things where you just have to give in. Then you can move past it." I looked at her and she had a wide grin across her face. "He is pretty hot if you ask me." She winked at me.

"Kate!" I swatted at her, giggling. She wasn't wrong, he was very attractive. His body was perfectly sculpted as well.. Damn it Millie. Maybe she was right.. "I will think about it, ok?"

"Ah! Yes! Millie's first boy toy! You have to tell me everything afterwards. I want to live vicariously through you." She winked again and jumped off the bed to avoid my swat. I threw my pillow at her and we both laughed.

"After you get done experimenting with Dillan, what about Jordan? I can tell you really like him."

"Oh no! I almost forgot about Jordan!" I jumped up and began throwing clothes on. "We will talk about it later, ok?" I threw a sweatshirt over my head as I ran out of the room. I heard Kate huff as the door shut behind me.

I jogged through campus to the water fountain. Jordan was sitting on the side, facing away from me. As I got closer, he turned slightly and looked at me. The only light was from the street lamps surrounding the fountain, and I couldn't quite see his face yet. I didn't know what to expect from this conversation, but I knew he was mad.

"I'm sorry it took so long." I said.

"What did I say about apologizing all the time." His voice was lighter than before.

"I know.. I just can't help it. I messed up today. I know how you feel and I put you in an awkward position." I looked down at my feet. This whole thing had been embarrassing and I felt horrible about it.

"We can't help what we feel, even if it's for someone like him. You never need to try to protect my feelings. I can handle waiting for you." His hand gently lifted my chin up. A gasp escaped my lips as I saw his face.

"Jordan.."