The Huntress Within: A Heroine’s Tale of Empowerment and Freedom

Stop yelling at me! I said to him as I walked into the bedroom and shut the door behind me. Simon had the habit of yelling at every thing I did. It baffles me how I'm still attracted to him despite the ill-treatment. Melissa! Melissa! He called right after me. I didn't respond a few minutes later I heard him drive out of the compound. I knew my love life was in shambles and it was having it's effect on other parts of my life. I was brought back to reality by my ringing phone, mom was calling. Hi baby, she said. hey mama, I replied. The conversation ended with her asking after my boyfriend Simon and I couldn't even tell her the things I was going through in the relationship because she'd hate him and definitely want me to leave him but how can I leave the only man I love? At times I felt like a slave for love. I sighed and accepted my lot as it is. I go to law school currently in my third year I even have more qualifications than he does but I guess love is truly blind for me to let a man boss me around the way he likes. I went back into the bedroom to tidy my scattered books and prepare for class the following day. School is just a 30 minutes drive away form the house and I for sure enjoy driving down that's the only time I get to have peace and quiet and not bother about Simon complaining or nagging about something I did or didn't do. I really be taking in the air and embracing the wind as it makes me become whole for that short time and it brings a temporary joy I cannot deny just like orgasming does. Alot of things and thoughts surely happen in 24 hours. Kenneth was my first, he took his time to teach me the principles of pleasure, from being whipped to being smooched. He was such an inspiration for everything s****l. He would have been the best man for me if he didn't die two years ago, he drowned. It was a painful experience for me as I loved him dearly and had hoped to spend the rest of my life with him. He was loving, kind, and he respected me and my opinions. It got me wondering what is special about Simon because he is the opposite of Kenneth yet I loved him way more than I loved Kenneth. Could it be that I was in love with toxicity? I shrugged the thought of and decided it was time to take a nap because one thing is for sure my mind was beginning to suffer from thinking about Simon. A tap on my shoulder woke me up and I opened eyes to realize Simon already got back from wherever he went to. What's for dinner? He asked, I was brewing with anger because he doesn't get to go out leaving things unsettled and coming back to ask me about dinner like he can't microwave the chicken or better still eat out but then again isn't it my responsibility to do these things for him? of course it is. A woman is meant to do these things for the man she loves, she need not let him starve. Chicken and fries is for dinner, I replied. Excusing myself to the kitchen to make preparations. I turned on my favourite song to help me relax and deal with the anger swelling within me. Love is patient I said to myself reciting 1corithians 13:4 calming myself down with the words of the lord. Dinner's ready I called out to him, at the table we barely said any words to each other. I knew I was hurting but I wasn't sure if he cared about that at all. He seemed satisfied with the meal this time as I heard no complain about the meal. I cleaned up and went in to shower only for him to join me and act like nothing happened during the day. I said to him ' do I mean nothing to you'? why must you make me feel like you're being forced to be with me? You keep making me feel less of myself and out of love because It's more glaring that you're doing this on purpose to me, why? Why must you make a big deal out of everything? what else do you want from me? He said as he hissed and turned his back on me to continue his business. I started becoming worried and scared that I might lose him after it was evening the following day and he was still ignoring me. It was so painful to know he that he could go hours without talking to me. I started practicing how i was going to talk to him and beg him when he gets back. I prepared a tasty meal anticipating him coming back. I was setting the table when he came in. I gave him a warm hug and kissed asking how his day went. I had a busy day at work, he replied. He had a car he used for pick ups an he worked as a chaffeur sometimes too. I saw the surprising look on his face with the way I welcomed him. I helped him prepare a bath and afterwards led him to the table to eat. I need to talk to you, I said. What is it about, he asked. I'm sorry for for everything I said. I don't like how things have gone bad between us and I would really like for things to get better between us. I love you dearly I said to him. I love you too Melissa, he said. let's go to bed and the rest was history. At about 7:00am my alarm rang bringing me back to reality that I had to meet up with class that morning before 9:00am. I quickly scrambled my way out of his arms and bed and ran to the bathroom to prepare for school. At about 7:50am I set out after preparing myself a sandwich and a milk drink for breakfast, of course I didn't forget to make some for Simon as my mum would always say being in a relationship means putting the efforts to make it work and care for your partner. I wrote a little note while smiling for Simon to read when he gets up from bed later. As an introvert I had a little bit of problem talking, meeting up with people and expressing myself without employing a means like writing. It's also my go to when I'm feeling down and dejected especially when Simon starts with his troubles which gets me really worried and unhappy. Why do I have to make my happiness depend on this man? I thought to myself as I drove to school. I still haven't finished paying the mortgage for the car. My momma still sends me money at 24 all because she wants me to concentrate and finish from law school in flying colors and open my very own law firm and continue to be my dream of working with the American Legal court. Big dream right? It's what I've always wanted ever since I was a child and my mom managed to do her best to make sure that that dream becomes reality as dad already left us since I was little as in dad died of cancer of the lungs which came as a shock because he wasn't a smoker but I guess life isn't fair. I remember watching other children play with their dads in elementary school and I'll feel lonely especially when mom couldn't be there for me to fill up the space dad left empty. I grew up with mom being both parents tried to turn up as much as she could but I guess the space if a father is always left empty. Mum didn't remarry because she feared that I wouldn't be able to receive all her love anymore and she would have to share her love with a man that night not know how to treat her daughter well. She wanted t make sure that I didn't suffer because I didn't receive enough love. I was her priority, she chose me before anything else and I knew that and I loved and promised myself to treat her right and make her happy as well knowing she sacrificed every other thing to make sure I was okay and comfortable. i thought to myself that I needed to make mama proud as I wanted to park my car. I got down and put a call to Tasha. Tasha is definitely one of the girls you would recognize as a diva, down to earth and moved around with the pride of a Lion. I still wonder why she decided to be friends with me because I really am a kind of person that finds it hard to stand up for myself when wronged I would rather just walk away than face an uncomfortable situation. Tasha went out more, made friends and partied. I wondered how she managed to still keep a good grade despite partying and staying out late. As I was about to call her I saw her walking toward me. Hey Mel, she said. Hi Tash, I replied. She was going on and on about her new girlfriend and how they did all sort of intimate things. Did I mention Tasha is gay? I bet I didn't but she is one hell of a sexy one. As she talked on I watched her beautiful lips move with each expression on her face as she talked about her experience she looked angelic in my eyes and I wanted to kiss her. Mel? Mel? She called out. You're not commenting or saying anything to all I've been saying. I snapped back to reality from my fantasies of kissing her. Is everything okay? She asked. She put her hands across my shoulder and her fingers dropped on my boobs and that sent a sensation all through my body system as we walked to class. I looked at her and smiled. I'm really glad I have beauty and brains as my best friend. As soon as class was over we headed to the library to access a text book to work on an assignment together before she headed out to her part time job. Her mum is an addict and barely worries about her daughter. She has had to work part time and and read just as much to retain her scholarship. I loved her courage to do what she wanted to, when she wanted to and to remain dedicated to her goals and aspiration. We parted ways after finishing our assignment. I went back to my car after bidding Tash goodbye. The drive home was a long one as I was thinking of what Simon might bring up as an issue once I get home. I got down to get veggies at Walmart and a bowl of ice cream for my cravings, i also got snacks to munch on when reading and a packet of chewing gum. Simon had a friend of his over whom I didn't make plans for and he flared up and because abusive, slamming the door on me to drive downtown with his friend to eat out, abandoning what I prepared initially. I was so scared that I had pissed him off. I waited till 12pm then it dawned on me that he wasn't coming back that night. I left for school the next day and he still wasn't back. At around 5pm when I got back he had come home showered and put his dirty cloths in the basket for me to take care of. He didn't drop a message , call or text for me and I was absolutely worried. I took my phone to call him. I called a couple of times without him responding then I sent him a text saying I was sorry. He came back at about 10:00pm drunk. How could a chaffeur get drunk. I wonder how he escaped security and got home without a fine or ticket for drunk driving. He slept off almost immediately and I helped him take off his shoes and and pant trouser so he could sleep comfortably while I continued to read. He suddenly got up at about 2 am and ran to throw up in the toilet. I went after him and was patting his back because he was suffering bad from the hangover, I made him a ginger tea afterwards to help with the nausea. After a while he seemed to have gotten better. I went ahead to talk about what happened the previous day and why he thought the best thing he could have done was to spend the night away and embarrassing me that way in the presence of his friend. Mel, not tonight, he said. I - Don't even bother, goodnight, he said as he cut me short as I was about to speak. It was a weekend today and I woke up a little after 10am with a flower beside my bed and note saying "I'm sorry for how I treated you babe". I love you. I pinched myself to make sure I wasn't dreaming. This is real I almost cried, I really can't remember the last time he did something this sweet for me. Maybe when we the relationship first started 11 months ago. I was so happy I thought of what I could do to make him happy. To know I really appreciated his gift and note to reconcile and apologise to me. He isn't someone who apologises when he is wrong so you know why this means a lot to me. I looked up sneakers on sss the rest is history. I had Tash over for a girls' time in. yes, a girls' in instead of out. we saw a movie, made popcorn, marinated chicken, made baked potatoes and orange juice. it was really nice having her over. Each time we spent together feels special than the last. it was like there's something about my best friend that was suddenly revealed to me, of course I have always known she is attractive but for sometime now I've been feeling a kind of attraction that I don't want to accept because I'm not sure I know what I'm thinking. My mum- Mel, the chicken is burning! Tash screamed and ran to check the. burning chicken. Thank God there's more left to grill because we sure can't eat burnt chicken, Tash said laughing. I tried to laugh but I was so embarrassed . I got lost in thought and didn't even smell the burning chicken. I sighed and asked her it leave it that'll take care of it. What's wrong? Is it anything I can help you with? she asked. Do you need me to- the rest I didn't hear as her n*****s brushed against my hands. Get behind me you Satan! I screamed in my head. Trying to not agree that my sense were awakened by her sight. This isn't right I said to myself as I came back to my surrounding. You can sit by the table and watch me I said to her. She sat down quietly and said nothing afterwards. I served us both and we ate in silence. This is delicious, as always. You're a good cook babe,she said. I smiled and and jokingly said it's in the genes. I remember granny Sam, she's an excellent cook and a good Samaritan and oh! she loves the word of God. She loves to preach to whoever would listen. She would gather little children give them treats and sing to them and encourage them to be obedient to their parents. I should pay a visit to my granny when we get our next semester break, i said to Tash. she would be so happy to see me. Let's go together when you decide, Tash said. That would mean a lot to me I replied. what are friends for? she replied. I smiled an gave her a hug i withdrew almost immediately to prevent fantasizing. Simon came in few minutes after she left and he met me with a kiss to the neck. I moaned slightly and reciprocated he lifted me and carried me to the bedroom. we slept different. Woke up to eat, went back to bed to cuddle till day break. I woke up to a gentle spank on switching to my side Simon had prepared pancakes with grilled sausage. I smiled praying he'd continue to be this sweet and not suddenly switch up on me again and ignore me for days. Surprise! He said and smiled down at me. He leaned in for a hug and I gladly took him in in my arms. I hugged him so tight like I wanted to make him feel the love I had for him by all means possible and in every way possible transfer that sweet love to him. I sat him down and fed him a little portion of the meal so we could both enjoy the meal before preparing for church. Church ended and we both headed for home the practice is to visit an amusement park or the cinema to spend some time together after church service. We decided to visit the cinemas. After getting the ticket and popcorn on our way to watch the movie someone tapped me from behind. On looking back I realised it was my law school mate. Hi Mel, he said with a big smile on his face. Unknowing to me Simon didn't like the idea of me waiting to have a conversation with him Hey Greg, I replied. what did you come here for, he asked. Obviously to see a movie, I replied. Hmm, so you talk? He said sarcasm. I laughed a bit and replied of course I'm not mute. I just don't react if my opinion is not directly needed , I said back to him. well, well said, I hope we get to talk better from now on and I'd really it if you can help me with your notes. I'll see you in class, he said. Bye, I replied.