Almost, Completely His

Chapter 14

Arthur

For the next two weeks Celeste and I spent every moment we could together. Well, as much as we could to not raise suspicions.

I would claim to go out riding, practice shooting or even seeing friends and she’d say she was going for a walk, reading outside in the gardens or excuse herself to her room.

There was even one instance where she accompanied her maid in an errand and I tagged along for “protection.”

And with every passing moment, I grew to adore her more.

Not only was she beautiful, but she was smart. I always knew she was intelligent but never fully grasped it. We talked about philosophy, religion, politics, science, mathematics, literature and even medicine. Neither of us were experts there but we had our opinions and theories.

I spent the same amount of time invested in our conversations and marveling at her mind as I did praising and adoring her beauty.

Her soft warm skin always had a hint of light citrus scent, her dark curls were wild and glistened red in the sun, her full pink lips were ever so inviting and her dark eyes were constantly observing everything and everyone.

The moments I was able to sneak a kiss on her wrist, caress her cheek and hold her hands were sacred to me. Which was why the letter I received this morning had shaken me to my core.

We sat together in the field behind the house, both with a book in hand. Celeste was very much invested in her story.

“Celeste?”

“Yes?” She kept her head down still reading.

“May I see you tonight in your room?”

Her snapped up and her eyes widened in horror.

“Excuse me?”

I felt my stomach drop. Did she think I wanted to have s*x with her? Was I scaring her? Did I insult her?

“It’s not what you think, I just wanted to talk about some things in private.” I assured her.

“At night? And in my room?” She paled. “Why not now?”

She asked a good question. I knew how this must look to her.

“Because it has to be later tonight. Celeste I would never do anything to insult you...” I put my book down and grabbed her small hand in mine. She was warm but also shaking a bit.

“I would never force anything on you and I’m not asking to go into your room for what you think....” I said reassuring her. “But if you’d like to meet somewhere else we can. It’d be easier for me to jump out the window or be seen wandering the house at night rather than you leaving my room or getting up so late.”

She nodded and I kissed her knuckles. “No pressure Celeste, I’m sorry for bringing it up. We can find another place and time.”

She took a deep breath and gave me a wobbly smile. “It’s ok... I’ll see you tonight.”

Celeste

My heart hammered in my chest as nightfall approached. Arthur told me he’d be meet me in my room after midnight. He said that was when majority of the servants were in bed and the ones still up were scarce and didn’t question where he was going at such hours.

I lay in bed anxious of what was going to happen. When he mentioned wanting to come to my room at night my heart had stopped. At first I thought it was because he dared to be so open about his s****l intentions with me, but when he said that wasn’t the case I felt a sense of disappointment.

Surely I should feel grateful that he didn’t want to bed me... but I didn’t. I didn’t know how much I wanted him to want me that way , how DEEPLY i desired him and wanted him to desire me in the same way.

Our time together was full of flirtations, bright smiles, stolen glances, warm hand holding and tight embraces. I had let myself get lost in the happiness of it all that I had forgotten that our time was limited.

I’d return home, I’d marry in a couple years, and maybe I’d never return to see him. There was a possibility that he wouldn’t be part of my future.

I felt tears in my eyes just thinking about that. When had I grown to deeply care for this man? To want him to be a part of my future?

There was a light knock on the door. I put on a light orange robe and opened the door. Arthur quickly stepped in as I closed it.

Even though I hadn’t looked at him yet I felt his body tense as he walked past me. When I turned around his eyes were sad. He stood in the middle of the room and the small candlelight from my bedside table illuminated his blonde hair ever so slightly. There was shadows on his face making him look so much more handsome.

“Arthur is everything alright?”

I walked to him, the nerves of him being in my room at night washing away.

“It’s complicated my dear.”

His term of endearment along with his solemn expression worried me.

“Arthur please do tell me what is going on.”

He walked to me, grabbed my hands in his and he kissed one of my wrists. His lips were soft and gentle but I could feel his labored breathing. I waited for him to say something, to calm down and talk to me.

Finally, he looked at me with his bright green eyes and said the five words that I never thought would send my world tumbling down.

“I’m going off to war.”