Almost, Completely His

Chapter 15

“What?”

Arthur’s eyes didn’t leave mine as he repeated his words. “I’m going off to war.”

My mind began to swirl and I felt my lungs collapsing. He was leaving? To war?

“No.... no you can’t.”

My hands began to shake and he led to the bed, helping me to sit.

He never let go of my hands, his warmth somehow kept me sane despite his news. I felt tears burn hot in my eyes. I looked at our hands interwoven.

His hands were large, warm and a bit tan and calloused while mine were small, soft and pale yet strong. How this very much resembled us. Him strong, large and rough around the edges and me the image of innocence and delicacy while hiding much beneath.

I finally looked up at his eyes which were watching me closely. I never wanted to look away, how I had taken those eyes for granted?

I hadn’t appreciated their brightness enough. I hadn’t touched his golden hair or sharp jaw enough. I wasted so many moments where I could have hugged him or held his hand.

This couldn’t be happening.

“But why? You’re the son of an Earl..”

He shrugged. “The second one. I’m told my country needs me in France.”

“But... I need you more.” My voice barley came out as a whisper. “I’ve barley gotten you... it’s not fair. I can’t lose you now. I can’t, I NEED you.”

Arthur smiled sadly and cupped my cheek with one warm hand. “ you have no idea how much I’ve longed to hear those words my dear.” I saw tears in his eyes as well. “They both break and fill my heart.”

I was flooded with emotions and pulled him to me. I hugged him tightly not wanting to let go. I felt the tears begin to fall and I shook my head fervently.

“No.. I won’t let you go. Not you... not now when I’ve only just started to... to have you.. to feel you.”

Arthur shivered against me as he hugged me back. “My dearest Celeste... you had me the moment you stepped into the room the first night you arrived.” He pulled back and smiled at me. “All you did was look at me and I was yours... even before I knew it myself.”

I pulled him in again, my tears hit his jacket. I buried my face deep in his golden hair. He smelled of soap and mahogany. A smell I now realized I wanted to be with me always. On my bed, my clothes, my body, everywhere.

I jerked back, grabbing him by the shoulders and speaking too quickly for my own ears.

“Run away with me..”

“What?”

“Let’s run away,” I grabbed his hands and I felt my heart thundering. “Let’s go away Arthur. Let’s leave everything and be together. Leave the war behind, the society, arranged marriages and responsibilities. Just you and me.”

His green eyes shone with hope but they dulled instantly. He shook his head. “I can’t do that Celeste. Not to you.”

“Why?!”

“Because I adore you… I want you to have the best life. A charmed life. With a grand house, your own gardens, a beautiful place to rest and live in. A happy and strong place to raise a family.” He kissed my forehead. “I know someday you’ll want that.”

I looked up at him, with wide eyes and open heart. I said the next words very carefully to make sure he’d hear me.

“I only want that with you.”

Both of us stood still for a moment.

Then in the blink of an eye he was kissing me.

He pulled me tightly to him, pressing me against his hard chest and holding me in his strong arms. His lips were eager and passionate, but he was also gentle.

Heat ran through my skin and I felt myself grow needy, hot and wet in between my legs. God I desired this man so much.

I felt adored, worshipped, desired and protected in his arms. Like the world was ours and his kiss could save me from anything.

My first kiss was with the man I loved..

Love.

I loved Arthur.

I wrapped my arms around his neck and opened my mouth. It felt like the right thing to do.

He instantly took my bottom lip in between his teeth and bit lightly. A soft yelp escaped my mouth and he groaned. The sound sent shivers up my spine. I wanted to hear more.

I pulled away and began to kiss his jaw. Then his ears and neck. I gripped his shoulders and before i knew it, he was laying me down on the bed. He was positioned above me and his eyes were wild.

His long golden hair was a mess and his cheeks were flushed. He looked beautiful.

He leaned down for one more kiss and I held him to me, refusing to let go.

How could I let him go now? Now that I knew exactly what he meant to me. I had to tell him.

So I did.

“I love you Arthur.”

His eyes went wide and he stilled. “What?”

I spoke louder this time, completely sure of what I was saying.

“I love you.”

Arthur

Celeste had flipped my world upside down with three words. Three words I had longed to hear from her but denied myself the hope that I would.

She lay under me, her dark curls all around her, her chest heaving, dark eyes wild and pink lips swollen. She blushed under my touch and I knew this woman was meant for me.

She touched my face and repeated it.

“I love you.”

I didn’t know what I should have said, or what I should have done. But I let my heart guide me.

“I love you too.”

The words rang loud and true. No other words could ever feel more right.

And I felt it to my bones.

I loved her.

I kissed her nose.

“I love the way you lose yourself in boring books. I love the way you scowl at people when they irritate you.”

I kissed her shoulder. “How you speak your mind and observe everything. I love your wild eyes and dark hair.”

I kissed her collarbone. “The beauty of your lips and your warm body. Even how you scold me and irritate me with your complaining.”

I kissed her lips and I could feel her trembling. “But most of all I love your spirit.”

She pulled me towards her and kissed me in the way only a woman in love could.

“Then don’t leave me.”

My heart broke. Tears filled my eyes and I saw her face sadden at my reaction.

“I have to.”

Tears fell down the side of her face and I kissed them away. My own tears fell and she wiped them away with her hand.

“Then stay with me tonight,” she said, kissing me softly. “Hold me tonight… as if nothing else mattered. Don’t leave me, even if it’s just tonight.”

I shifted her so her head was laying on top of a plush pillow. I pulled the duvet over her and me, and pulled her into my arms.

She nestled her head in my chest and her warm body fit perfectly into mine. We were made for eachother.

She wrapped her arms around me and held on tightly.

“Stay with me tonight.”

I kissed her hair and nodded. She smelled of lemon and I wanted to smell her forever.

Pulling her closer to me, i felt complete for the first time in my life.

“Of course my love.”