Rejected and Forgotten

Chapter 4

{Irish’s POV}

My parents were very surprised to find me outside of our home with enough luggage that would be obvious to make them realize that I’d be staying here for quite some time. They didn’t ask anything, but that doesn’t mean that I didn’t see the lingering suspicion and knowing look that they shared with each other. I thought it would be like that for the rest of my stay here—no questions and all—but after I had settled my things in my old room, my father appeared outside of my room, and I knew then that I hadn't fully escaped the questions in their minds.

“What happened?” He asked once he was inside and seated on the sofa while I sat across from him. “I know that you’re supposed to visit us next week, and I’m sure that no matter how busy the pack is, Damon wouldn’t let you go here without him.” He gave me a stern look as if daring me to lie—I won’t. There’s no need to lie when it’d been my companion since I’d been blind enough not to see and realize the truth.

I took a deep breath, preparing myself for the thousands of knives that would pierce my heart the moment I uttered the truth. My truth.

“I…” I swallowed, a tinge of hesitation passing for a second before I realized that I had to do this. “I—I can’t be around him anymore. It’s over, Dad. I’m sorry.”

I didn’t want to see or face my father’s scrutiny, so I looked down on my lap, enduring the tightening of my heart as if someone was squeezing it to the core.

For what seemed like an eternity, my father remained silent. His heavy gaze lingered on me despite his quiet thoughts, and no matter how many times I stopped myself, a small doubt had formed in my head, questioning my decision. Was he judging me because of what I did? Didn’t I do the right thing?

He cleared his throat, and the thoughts in my head were instantly silenced.

“And Damon let you?” He asked as if he couldn’t believe it was possible—that my mate had really let me leave him without much of a fight.

I tried my best not to flinch at just the mention of his name and focus on the question instead, but deep inside, I felt like I’d been cut in half before being dumped into an ocean of salt.

“He wasn’t at home when I left.”

My father doesn’t know about Damon’s and my holiday date today, and I doubt that he’d care even if I told him, so I spare him the other details. And besides, it wasn’t just about Damon forgetting about our tradition. The whole problem was us.

It doesn’t feel like us anymore.

Our relationship was like a crumbling mountain of hope. It used to be full of it, but as time passed, it had been neglected, abandoned, and condoned. I had to leave before I’d be totally wrecked.

“I see.” Was all his reply.

To my relief, my father left me alone after that, so I was able to rest peacefully in my room, but the thing was, the quieter it got, the louder my thoughts became, and the clearer Damon’s voice sounded in my head.

Where are you, my love?

I kept telling myself that he didn’t care—that he probably wouldn’t even notice that I was gone because he was busy with the pack, as always—but there was still a part of me that wanted to be convinced, that was still hoping that Damon was still the same man I loved.

And that’s the thing.

The more I hope to bring back the old us and the more I hold onto him, the more it hurts, and the more I bleed. So before I completely bleed out, I have to remove the thing that’s hurting me the most, no matter how much I love that thing—no matter how much I love him.

I choose to save myself this time.

When I woke up in the morning, my first instinct was to stretch my arm, expecting to feel that familiar warmth from a certain man next to me, but I realized that the comforter was cold and flat. I opened my eyes, and a familiar ache returned as the memories of yesterday came crashing back.

I left him.

I shouldn’t be this sad and pained and down. I already forgot the last time I woke up with Damon beside me even before I left his pack, so I should get used to it. I’m okay. It’s okay.

A knock on my door made me stand up even though all I wanted was to stay curled up in my bed all day. When I opened the door, I was surprised to see my mother.

Victoria Lee grew up with nothing. She left her home when she was ten because she couldn’t endure her abusive parents anymore. She had to survive without anything and anyone, but she was smart. She was ambitious; that’s why when she had the opportunity to be with my father—a count from the Lycan royal family—she grabbed it. She took it as a key out of poverty even though she was twenty years younger than my father.

“Irish.” There was urgency in her voice, but she remained composed—she always was. With her jewelry that hung everywhere—her wrist, neck, ears, and fingers—that cost an arm and leg, she had to act like some regal lady somehow. “You have to stop him. He’s causing a havoc outside.”

My brows furrowed in confusion.

Who?

I was about to ask her when a familiar angry, yet desperate voice resounded, causing my eyes to widen.

“I have to see her! Let me in, or I’ll destroy all of your fvcking property!” Damon’s voice roared from outside. My room was upstairs, surrounded by other rooms and hallways, yet I heard his voice clearly.

My heart thrum wildly against my chest as I looked at my mother, who merely rolled her eyes in disdain at my mate, who was obviously causing a scene outside.

I took a step forward, ready to go downstairs, but a thought halted my steps. Am I ready to face him? What if I went weak and came home with him? I’m sure that’s why he was here, but who will win?

“What are you waiting for?” My mother barked. “Talk to him and send him away. He’s already caused enough damage.” She scoffed before walking away.

I swallowed, my hands as cold as ice. I breathed out before following my mother.

While descending the stairs, I could hear Damon’s voice getting louder with each step I made. It was enough to drive my nerves to the edge.

“Let me see her! Let me see my mate. I have to see if she’s fine. I have to talk to her!”

My mother turned to me when she stopped just outside of the closed front door. I’m sure that Damon was on the other side, fighting his way inside.

“Fix your mess, Irish.”

I bit the inside of my cheeks and slowly walked towards the door and gripped the handle. My insides were screaming, but I had to be calm on the outside. There were eyes watching, judging, and waiting for me to lose my cool. I wouldn’t.

I pulled open the door, revealing the mess outside. There were guards stopping Damon, and in front of him was my father. His cold gaze was directed at my mate as if he was measuring his worth, which he doesn’t see.

“Stay out of my way—”

“Damon,” I said with a hint of anger.

He stilled and looked in my direction. I was surprised to see the amount of desperation in his eye. Exhaustion marred his face as well as…regret?

My heart throbbed.

I clenched my teeth. Stop.

“Irish…let’s talk,” he pleaded.

I glanced at my father. “I’ll talk to him.”

I was angry at Damon, but I didn’t like the way my parents handled him. It was like he was more of a trespasser than their daughter’s mate. I knew that they didn’t like him from the very start because he wasn’t of noble blood, and over time, they merely tolerated him because of the things he has accomplished, but I never stopped hoping that they’d learn to like him.

And they never stopped proving me wrong.

The guard finally let go of Damon, but he didn’t leave his spot. I didn’t too. I waited for my father to go back inside and shut the door close. Only when I was certain that no one was listening did I look at Damon.

His eyes were already on me as if it didn’t leave me in the first place. But it did, and God knows I wasn’t talking about his eyes.

After a minute of silence, I finally decided to break it.

“What are you doing here, Damon?” I crossed my arms over my chest, suddenly feeling conscious. I know him and how weak I always seem to become when it comes to him. And I may not admit it, but I don’t trust myself right now.

He finally walked towards me; his expression was a mixture of disbelief and a little bit of anger.

“What do you mean, what was I doing here?” He asked as if he couldn’t believe that I just said that. “I almost lost my mind when I found out that you left the pack alone.” He wasn’t yelling, but he was frustrated. “And now you’re asking what I was doing here? I’m here to take you back, Irish.”

Hearing him say all those things as if he was the only one who’d been through hell and back made me feel so angry. It was as if all the pent-up anger in my chest suddenly wanted to resurface.

I looked at him. “You made a promise, Damon. You made tons of them over the years. Promises that you broke as if it was as easy as breathing.” I stopped when my voice shook and took a deep breath. Calm down. “You missed one of the most important days for me…for us, but I guess it didn’t matter to you anymore, right? Nothing in this relationship mattered to you anymore.”

He shook his head. All the anger in his eyes was quick to disappear. It was replaced by regret, guilt, and pain.

“Irish…love—” I almost flinched hearing him call me that. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry I wasn’t there yesterday, but hear me out first, okay? The trespasser I told you about escaped, and I had to take action for the pack—”

“Of course.” I let out a bitter laugh. “Of course, it was for the pack. It’s always for the pack.”

He shook his head and gave me a desperate look. “Irish, everything that I’m doing is for you. I did all those things for you. You know that, right?” He looked hopeful.

I swallowed.

I used to believe that before because I could see it. He promised me a life without worry, and he gave me exactly that. But the problem with him was, even after he achieved everything he promised he would have, he didn’t stop. Nothing was ever enough for him.

I let out a shaky sigh before I slowly shook my head.

“No. I don’t.” The pain that flashed through his eyes should be enough for me to stop, but I didn’t. “Everything that you were doing isn’t for me anymore. I was happy with what I had. I would be happy with everything that you’d give me. Expensive or cheap, big or small—none of it would matter because we’re together. Everything that you’re doing was all for you! It was you who were never contented. It was you who were never satisfied enough.”

Now everything made sense to me. I thought seeing him would change my mind, but I realized that this relationship had crumbled long before I came to my senses. I see it now.

It’s not going to be easy, but I had to do this for myself. I’ve endured this pain for so long, but this time, I had to choose myself.

My bottom lip was shaking, and my heart was breaking, but I forced myself to look at him. A tear fell from my eyes as his expression changed. He looked like he’d seen something in my eyes that made him shake his head.

“No. Irish, please. I’ll make it up to you. Just please, love.” He took my hand desperately as he continued to shake his head.

This wasn’t the cold Alpha that I knew. This man in front of me wasn’t the ruthless man in the stories I’ve heard.

A sob came out of my mouth as thousands of knives stabbed me in my chest. I pulled my hands away from him as I uttered the words that I knew would change everything from now on.

“I, I-Irish Lee, Luna of the Crescent Moon pack, hereby renounce my position as your Luna and r-reject you, Alpha Damon Carter of the Crescent Moon pack. We are no longer mates.”